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Last Friday Melbourne, Australia ended our 6th strict lock down with some relaxation of restrictions. Since March 2020 we have had 263 days in lockdown. What a record to have.

One of our jokes
Q: What day is the hardest of a 7 day strict lockdown?

(Where does the hide button live now?)

A: Day 55
 
A woman went to the emergency room, where she was seen by a young new doctor. After about 3 minutes in the examination room, the doctor told her she was pregnant.
She burst out of the room and ran down the corridor screaming.
An older doctor stopped her and asked what the problem was; after listening to her story, he calmed her down and sat her in another room.
Then the doctor marched down the hallway to the first doctor's room.
"What wrong with you?" he demanded. This woman is 63 years old, she has two grown children and several grandchildren, and you told her she was pregnant?!!"
The new doctor continued to write on his clipboard and without looking up said:
"Does she still have hiccups?"
 
I brought a new GPS. The first trip with it was to a cemetery I'd never been to before.
It directed me fine but i was concerned it when announced upon arrival "You have reached your final destination"
At least it didn't say "proceed to the route . . . "
 
A 320kg Argentine cow is a viral hit after being filming stumbling down a waterslide at a park 800kms west of Rio De Janeiro. It was reported that the beast was destined for the slaughterhouse before climbing to the top of the slide and going down.

Media outlets are milking this story for all it is worth.
 
A 'Making your Marriage Better' was held in Australia.
The speaker noted that most Aust. husbands do not know their wife's favourite flower.
One man leaned across to his wife and said "That's not true. I know yours .Yours is the self raising flour".
 
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