Am I drinking too much?

[Smoker]

I have been a fan of drinking for a long time because I like to enjoy life and howl at the moon sometimes, but lately my wife has been telling me that I drink too much. People throw around the word alcoholic like they understand the complex nature of the brain and how neurotransmitters work on dopamine receptors in the brain, but I'm trying to actually understand if I have a real problem. I'm looking at the criteria in the DSM 5 for what they call Alcohol Use Disorder and I have a few disagreements and questions. These are the question psychologists ask to diagnose somebody who has a drinking problem:

DSM 5 Alcohol Use Disorder


1. Had times when you ended up drinking more, or longer, than you intended?

Who actually plans out ahead of time before you get to a party exactly how much you are going to drink, or how long you will stay? And even if you do that, should it not be allowed to have a few more drinks if it is a good party and with fun people?



2. More than once wanted to cut down or stop drinking, or tried to, but couldn’t?

Everybody knows that drinking is not good for you, except for maybe one glass of wine or beer per day to help relax. Drinking water is good for you, but if you drink too much it will kill you. If you drink water or alcohol in moderation, then maybe you will be ok.


3. Spent a lot of time drinking? Or being sick or getting over other aftereffects?

This is two different questions. How much is a lot of time? If you're drunk every day or every other day then yeah it's probably a problem. But who gets to decide how often you should drink? If you are young and in shape and your liver can process the alcohol then maybe you are fine to drink as much as you want?



4. Wanted a drink so badly you couldn’t think of anything else?
**This is new to DSM–5**

Yeah it's probably bad if you can't think of anything else besides wanting a drink, unless somebody you love just died or you are going through serious trauma like a divorce or something. Having a drink and contemplating the meaning of life or having a serious soul searching session is maybe better than hurting other people or yourself.



5. Found that drinking—or being sick from drinking—often interfered with taking care of your home or family? Or caused job troubles? Or school problems?

Hangovers are a part of drinking and yes they will keep you from being at 100% efficiency, but maybe your mind needs a release every once in a while. If you drink too much so that your children go hungry then yeah you have a problem. If you drink too much and can't mow the grass the next day, then fuck it who gives a shit. The grass is just a stupid plant that doesn't really effect anything except the HOA rules.



6. Continued to drink even though it was causing trouble with your family or friends?

If your real friends are telling you to stop drinking then yeah you should probably consider what they are saying. If your family and friends are a bunch of idiots who don't understand how the brain works, but are quick to judge you, then why should you listen to them.



7. Given up or cut back on activities that were important or interesting to you, or gave you pleasure, in order to drink?

That's probably another good rule. If alcohol keeps you from doing things that you enjoy then maybe it's a problem.



8. More than once gotten into situations while or after drinking that increased your chances of getting hurt (such as driving, swimming, using machinery, walking in a dangerous area, or having unsafe sex)?

Life is a mystery. If you want to live inside a protective bubble to keep all the bad things from hurting you, then don't ever drink or do anything that might lead to danger. But if I go to a party and have a few drink, and then end up diving into a swimming pool with new people I just met, I don't think this should be considered a drinking problem. Perhaps the psychologists who made this rule are not very interesting at parties and don't understand how to have fun.



9. Continued to drink even though it was making you feel depressed or anxious or adding to another health problem? Or after having had a memory blackout?

This is one of the rules that I agree with. If somebody is drinking so much that they are experiencing black outs or depression then it's probably time to take a break. This is true of all mind altering substances and not just alcohol.



10. Had to drink much more than you once did to get the effect you want? Or found that your usual number of drinks had much less effect than before?

I am descended from Vikings who used to drink from the skulls of their enemies. Just because I have a higher alcohol tolerance level than most people doesn't mean I have a drinking problem Sometime I think people are jealous when I can drink more than them and jump to conclusions



11. Found that when the effects of alcohol were wearing off, you had withdrawal symptoms, such as trouble sleeping, shakiness, restlessness, nausea, sweating, a racing heart, or a seizure? Or sensed things that were not there?

This is one of the harsh effects of being a drinker. The withdrawal symptoms are terrible, but at least when I get drunk and smoke some weed and listen to some music, or enjoy a movie, then I can finally sleep. Alcohol lets me relax, and for somebody who suffers from anxiety that's a blessing. I know it's not good for me but neither is sugar or thinking about the people you hate. I know alcohol kills a lot of people every year, much more than drugs do, but if the US tries to outlaw alcohol again then I will be out there in the streets protesting with a bottle of whiskey

 

[rousseau]

There's a difference between being addicted and having a problem. You can be addicted and even drink too much, but be functional. That was the case for me about a decade ago: I was a pretty effective person but couldn't stop drinking.

I think people have acquired an unhealthy notion that you need to be guzzling vodka at 8 am to consider the possibility that you're drinking too much. This causes many of us to ignore how much we do drink, and the real addiction that's there. And because alcohol is so pervasive globally an unhealthy habit goes largely ignored.

In other words, if you were eating three McDonald's cheeseburgers every Friday and Saturday night you wouldn't necessarily have a problem, but it would be an unhealthy habit. Similarly, drinking, if overdone, is an unhealthy habit. So ultimately a person needs to decide what, and how much of it, they let in their body.

For me, back in 2012, after quitting smoking, I tried to take a stab at cutting back on alcohol. At the time drinking was so normal to me that I couldn't fathom not doing it. It took a long time, but by 2017 I went a full year without alcohol before I got married. And lately I just don't really like drinking at all.. entirely addiction free.

 

[Jimmy Higgins]

Your wife knows you much better than any of us! That doesn’t make her word gospel (especially round here ), but she’d be much more familiar with your habits and how they’ve changed or progressed over time.

Are you going to tell her, ‘but the people at TalkFreethought said I’m not drinking too much?’ Long story short, why is she wrong? Going through a psych diagnosis doesn’t get to the brass tacks. How much and how often do you drink? Can you drink less?

The fact you are even asking must indicate you feel there is some level of truth in there. And drinking too much doesn’t have to equal alcoholism.

 

[Smoker]

Lately I drink about two or three times a month, but when I do drink it's usually a lot. I live in Texas so it's normal here to try and drink more than your friends. My wife is on fertility drugs because we are trying to have a baby, and her brain is on fire with hormones. I'm just looking for logical and reasonable explanations for when it is acceptable to have a drink, if that is possible.

 

[Smoker]

There's a difference between being addicted and having a problem. You can be addicted and even drink too much, but be functional. That was the case for me about a decade ago: I was a pretty effective person but couldn't stop drinking.

Do you still enjoy the smell of somebody smoking a cigarette? Can you smoke a cigar without inhaling it?

 

[rousseau]

There's a difference between being addicted and having a problem. You can be addicted and even drink too much, but be functional. That was the case for me about a decade ago: I was a pretty effective person but couldn't stop drinking.

Do you still enjoy the smell of somebody smoking a cigarette? Can you smoke a cigar without inhaling it?

I went through phases with quitting smoking (it'll be ten years in October). For the first year or two I craved a bit. After that point I didn't crave them but enjoyed the smell, and would occasionally dream about smoking. Then a little while longer and it was like the habit never existed. I find cigarettes and cigarette smoke repulsive now.

What I still miss is the physical act of smoking; if it wasn't a horribly unhealthy habit I'd likely still do it. Actually, a little while ago I smoked Holy Basil for about a month out of pandemic boredom, but I realized it shouldn't be long-term and I stopped doing it.

 

[rousseau]

Lately I drink about two or three times a month, but when I do drink it's usually a lot. I live in Texas so it's normal here to try and drink more than your friends. My wife is on fertility drugs because we are trying to have a baby, and her brain is on fire with hormones. I'm just looking for logical and reasonable explanations for when it is acceptable to have a drink, if that is possible.

Three heavy sessions a month sounds like a lot to me (in terms of long-term health), but it may not be a problem. It might become a problem once you have a baby, though, it's a lot harder to parent hungover. You may find you can't support your partner well enough while still binge drinking that often.

 

[untermensche]

If you think you might have a problem and other people are saying you have a problem you probably do.

 

[DrZoidberg]

I have been a fan of drinking for a long time because I like to enjoy life and howl at the moon sometimes, but lately my wife has been telling me that I drink too much. People throw around the word alcoholic like they understand the complex nature of the brain and how neurotransmitters work on dopamine receptors in the brain, but I'm trying to actually understand if I have a real problem. I'm looking at the criteria in the DSM 5 for what they call Alcohol Use Disorder and I have a few disagreements and questions. These are the question psychologists ask to diagnose somebody who has a drinking problem:

DSM 5 Alcohol Use Disorder


1. Had times when you ended up drinking more, or longer, than you intended?

Who actually plans out ahead of time before you get to a party exactly how much you are going to drink, or how long you will stay? And even if you do that, should it not be allowed to have a few more drinks if it is a good party and with fun people?



2. More than once wanted to cut down or stop drinking, or tried to, but couldn’t?

Everybody knows that drinking is not good for you, except for maybe one glass of wine or beer per day to help relax. Drinking water is good for you, but if you drink too much it will kill you. If you drink water or alcohol in moderation, then maybe you will be ok.


3. Spent a lot of time drinking? Or being sick or getting over other aftereffects?

This is two different questions. How much is a lot of time? If you're drunk every day or every other day then yeah it's probably a problem. But who gets to decide how often you should drink? If you are young and in shape and your liver can process the alcohol then maybe you are fine to drink as much as you want?



4. Wanted a drink so badly you couldn’t think of anything else?
**This is new to DSM–5**

Yeah it's probably bad if you can't think of anything else besides wanting a drink, unless somebody you love just died or you are going through serious trauma like a divorce or something. Having a drink and contemplating the meaning of life or having a serious soul searching session is maybe better than hurting other people or yourself.



5. Found that drinking—or being sick from drinking—often interfered with taking care of your home or family? Or caused job troubles? Or school problems?

Hangovers are a part of drinking and yes they will keep you from being at 100% efficiency, but maybe your mind needs a release every once in a while. If you drink too much so that your children go hungry then yeah you have a problem. If you drink too much and can't mow the grass the next day, then fuck it who gives a shit. The grass is just a stupid plant that doesn't really effect anything except the HOA rules.



6. Continued to drink even though it was causing trouble with your family or friends?

If your real friends are telling you to stop drinking then yeah you should probably consider what they are saying. If your family and friends are a bunch of idiots who don't understand how the brain works, but are quick to judge you, then why should you listen to them.



7. Given up or cut back on activities that were important or interesting to you, or gave you pleasure, in order to drink?

That's probably another good rule. If alcohol keeps you from doing things that you enjoy then maybe it's a problem.



8. More than once gotten into situations while or after drinking that increased your chances of getting hurt (such as driving, swimming, using machinery, walking in a dangerous area, or having unsafe sex)?

Life is a mystery. If you want to live inside a protective bubble to keep all the bad things from hurting you, then don't ever drink or do anything that might lead to danger. But if I go to a party and have a few drink, and then end up diving into a swimming pool with new people I just met, I don't think this should be considered a drinking problem. Perhaps the psychologists who made this rule are not very interesting at parties and don't understand how to have fun.



9. Continued to drink even though it was making you feel depressed or anxious or adding to another health problem? Or after having had a memory blackout?

This is one of the rules that I agree with. If somebody is drinking so much that they are experiencing black outs or depression then it's probably time to take a break. This is true of all mind altering substances and not just alcohol.



10. Had to drink much more than you once did to get the effect you want? Or found that your usual number of drinks had much less effect than before?

I am descended from Vikings who used to drink from the skulls of their enemies. Just because I have a higher alcohol tolerance level than most people doesn't mean I have a drinking problem Sometime I think people are jealous when I can drink more than them and jump to conclusions



11. Found that when the effects of alcohol were wearing off, you had withdrawal symptoms, such as trouble sleeping, shakiness, restlessness, nausea, sweating, a racing heart, or a seizure? Or sensed things that were not there?

This is one of the harsh effects of being a drinker. The withdrawal symptoms are terrible, but at least when I get drunk and smoke some weed and listen to some music, or enjoy a movie, then I can finally sleep. Alcohol lets me relax, and for somebody who suffers from anxiety that's a blessing. I know it's not good for me but neither is sugar or thinking about the people you hate. I know alcohol kills a lot of people every year, much more than drugs do, but if the US tries to outlaw alcohol again then I will be out there in the streets protesting with a bottle of whiskey

So what's the questions? It looks to me like you're trying very hard to disqualify the questions. It looks defensive. That's a worrying sign.

If you are prone to anxiety that will put you at a risk for any addiction. So you will need to be extra cautious and attentive to the signs.

I helped support an ex-wife out of her alcohol addiction. The way the rehab staff explained it to me, if you have a pattern of drinking (or doing anything) in order to escape painful or unpleasant feelings, then it's likely addiction. Normal people don't do that. Normal people who feel bad just accept it and feel bad. They manage it by just sitting with it until it goes away. Or doesn't go away. Normal people are cool and chill about life most of the time. People prone to addiction are often overwhelmed by negative emotions and have a strong emotional incentive to cling to whatever short term coping mechanism they can find. Just to make it through the day. Addicts are often stressed out by a lack of distractions. They often find it painful to have no company but their own thoughts. Normal people tend to enjoy being able to chill and cool about nothing happening. Normal people can go to a bar or a party and not really drink. They can buy one or two drinks and it'll last them a whole evening. It's very common. Or not drink.

I think a major problem for alcoholics to self diagnose themselves is that they don't know how it is to not be an alcoholic. They think that everybody is like them. Nobody can read minds and truly know what others are feeling.

Alcoholics tend to have quite the number of a really fucked up thought patterns and dysfunctional coping mechanisms. The drinking is just the crowning piece on a mountain of shit.

And lastly. You can test whether you're an alcoholic or not. It's a super simple test. Don't drink for three months. And pay attention on what happens in your brain. It needs to be three months. Even alcoholics can stay sober a week or a month. It needs to be a couple of months before the psychological coping mechanisms start unravelling. Typically alcoholics will shift to some other common addictive behaviour. Often sex addiction or extreme training. Or getting obsessive about dieting. It can get quite humous seeing it in a partner struggling her way through it.

We got divorced 15 years ago. She was sober then. About a year ago she called me up and said that she'd checked herself into rehab again. Now she's sober again. Being an alcoholic is a constant struggle.

Good luck

 

[Bronzeage]

Lately I drink about two or three times a month, but when I do drink it's usually a lot. I live in Texas so it's normal here to try and drink more than your friends. My wife is on fertility drugs because we are trying to have a baby, and her brain is on fire with hormones. I'm just looking for logical and reasonable explanations for when it is acceptable to have a drink, if that is possible.

That's not actually normal, even if it may be common in your social circles.

The "I can drink more than you can" competition is a rationalization which gives one an excuse to do something self hazardous. Most people outgrow this phase of adolescence where they are eager to do all the "grown up" things.

If we assume you are a free man over the age of 21, with the economic ability to buy your own alcohol, it's acceptable to have a drink anytime you please. It's what you do afterward which may not be acceptable, but this raises the obvious question, whose acceptance do you want? If you want the acceptance of the men you are trying to out drink, that's fine. You do need to remember, any feelings of acceptance you have enjoyed were felt at a time of severe impairment.

Your wife may have a different idea of acceptable. The basic fact of this situation is that alcohol is a toxic substance that the body can tolerate in small quantities. It comes down to how often and how severely do you want to poison yourself. That is entirely your call.

 

[untermensche]

Alcoholism is not a moral issue.

 

[Tharmas]

Re: the topic of alcoholism

First of all, let me say that I speak as a recovered alcoholic. I have practiced absolute abstinence for many years, successfully and happily.

Second, I agree with DrZoidberg in general that typically there are psychological issues, but I would add that they can differ from individual to individual. In my case it turned out I was bipolar, and my drinking was perhaps a form of self medication.

And I definitely agree with untermensche that it is not a moral issue. My experience tells me that there are strong physiological, genetic influences in how one responds to alcohol – by no means are all drinkers alike in their reactions to alcohol.

As for your responses to the criteria in the DSM, I can’t comment. No doubt we have very different life experiences. For one thing, I was a daily drinker, not a binge drinker like you.

In my experience, the only one who can say you have a problem is you. If you are comfortable with your life, why change? If you are not comfortable with your life, perhaps it’s time to consider some other options.

Personally, I drank through a marriage, two careers, a house and a couple of cars, and ended sleeping on friends’ couches and living in the streets before it occurred to me I might have a problem with alcohol. Perhaps I’m not too bright. But that’s my story, not yours. Whatever you decide, I wish you all the best.

 

[southernhybrid]

You don't sound like an alcoholic if you are only drinking 2 or 3 times a month. My suggestion is that you have your liver enzymes checked the next time you have a medical appointment. That should tell you if the ETOH is affecting your liver in a negative way. It's unlikely to show any damage if you are still very young, but if you're over 40, it might have some significance. Of course, drugs like acetaminophen can also cause liver damage, so try to avoid Tylenol if you have a hangover.

My late grandfather was an alcoholic, yet I never saw him drunk. He took little hits of whiskey every few hours. I think it was a way of self medication, plus his father was an alcoholic, so it could have been genetic. Perhaps your wife just doesn't like seeing your drunk. Drinking to excess certainly can be a problem if you are driving or doing anything that requires having all of your cognition in tact, but I'm sure you already knew that. I also know that sometimes people do foolish things when they drink too much.

My late grandfather died of liver failure at the age of 70. Not to stereotype all Irish men with the name of Tommy Doyle.... Not that all people who over use ETOH die from that habit, but at least be aware that it can damage the liver if you drink enough of it.

I agree that using any type of drug has nothing to do with morality. A lot of us have habits that may be harmful to our health.

 

[Loren Pechtel]

I have been a fan of drinking for a long time because I like to enjoy life and howl at the moon sometimes, but lately my wife has been telling me that I drink too much. People throw around the word alcoholic like they understand the complex nature of the brain and how neurotransmitters work on dopamine receptors in the brain, but I'm trying to actually understand if I have a real problem. I'm looking at the criteria in the DSM 5 for what they call Alcohol Use Disorder and I have a few disagreements and questions. These are the question psychologists ask to diagnose somebody who has a drinking problem:

DSM 5 Alcohol Use Disorder


1. Had times when you ended up drinking more, or longer, than you intended?

Who actually plans out ahead of time before you get to a party exactly how much you are going to drink, or how long you will stay? And even if you do that, should it not be allowed to have a few more drinks if it is a good party and with fun people?

I think this is more about things like intending to stop by the pub for a beer and then having several.

6. Continued to drink even though it was causing trouble with your family or friends?

If your real friends are telling you to stop drinking then yeah you should probably consider what they are saying. If your family and friends are a bunch of idiots who don't understand how the brain works, but are quick to judge you, then why should you listen to them.

And your wife isn't a real friend?

8. More than once gotten into situations while or after drinking that increased your chances of getting hurt (such as driving, swimming, using machinery, walking in a dangerous area, or having unsafe sex)?

Life is a mystery. If you want to live inside a protective bubble to keep all the bad things from hurting you, then don't ever drink or do anything that might lead to danger. But if I go to a party and have a few drink, and then end up diving into a swimming pool with new people I just met, I don't think this should be considered a drinking problem. Perhaps the psychologists who made this rule are not very interesting at parties and don't understand how to have fun.

I think you miss the point here. They're talking about doing things drunk that you would have regarded as too dangerous when sober. It's not about whether you take risks in life, but whether alcohol causes you to take risks you otherwise wouldn't have.

11. Found that when the effects of alcohol were wearing off, you had withdrawal symptoms, such as trouble sleeping, shakiness, restlessness, nausea, sweating, a racing heart, or a seizure? Or sensed things that were not there?

This is one of the harsh effects of being a drinker. The withdrawal symptoms are terrible, but at least when I get drunk and smoke some weed and listen to some music, or enjoy a movie, then I can finally sleep. Alcohol lets me relax, and for somebody who suffers from anxiety that's a blessing. I know it's not good for me but neither is sugar or thinking about the people you hate. I know alcohol kills a lot of people every year, much more than drugs do, but if the US tries to outlaw alcohol again then I will be out there in the streets protesting with a bottle of whiskey

If you have withdrawal symptoms you're addicted and thus you're drinking too much. This one alone is diagnostic to me.

Also, as a general answer I would say that asking the question means you probably have a problem.

 

[Rhea]

Lately I drink about two or three times a month, but when I do drink it's usually a lot. I live in Texas so it's normal here to try and drink more than your friends. My wife is on fertility drugs because we are trying to have a baby, and her brain is on fire with hormones.

If you wife is trying to get pregnant, and assuming it’s with your sperm, you should know that your sperm on alcohol are more likely to create fetal defects and abnormalities..

https://www.healthline.com/health-n...s-may-contribute-to-birth-defects-in-newborns

New evidence has found a link between paternal alcohol consumption before conception and the chances of fetal birth defects. Fathers who drink alcohol regularly before conception are associated with greater chances of birth defects like congenital heart disease, limb anomalies, clefts, and digestive tract anomalies.

And if that can’t make you stop getting full-pissed-drunk every week for the duration of your conception attempts, then yes, you are letting it interfere with what you really want - a healthy baby.

I'm just looking for logical and reasonable explanations for when it is acceptable to have a drink, if that is possible.

It’s acceptable after your wife conceives and the pregnancy passes the three month mark and the worst risks of miscarriage. But, IMHO, if she can’t drink, then you’re a bit of a dick to drink in front of her throughout the pregnancy and breastfeeding. So make that 2023 or so.

 

[Toni]

I don't know you or your life but:
It seems to me that you have minimized each point of the DSM alcohol disorder questionnaire or sought to dismiss the question or danced around answering it to justify your relationship with alcohol. Avoiding direct answers seems like a strong indicator that these questions make you feel uncomfortable. That discomfort may be because you actually recognize that you do indeed have a drinking problem.

1. People who don't have a drinking problem might go to an event or party or just for a night out and have in mind that they plan to only have (X) number of drinks because they know they won't feel their best the next day if they over indulge. Or they think they get a little too silly or argumentative. Or worry about being able to drive. Or whatever. And then: that's what they do. They stop at X drinks. They don't lose track or decide they're having so much fun that another couple of drinks won't make the fun last longer or be more fun. And....if they realize that the drinks were a bit stronger than they expected, they stop earlier or tell their friend that maybe they've over indulged and need to make it an early night and could the friend please drive.

People who have a drinking problem...see no problem with drinking as much as they feel like and they usually feel like one more wouldn't hurt.

2.It seems like you are avoiding answering this question. Why?

3. Avoidance again and quibbling over the particulars of the question. Is it hitting too close to home? FWIW, if your 25 and drink a six pack or equivalent a few times a week, you are hurting your liver. Your liver can't handle it. You're just young and think you'll live forever.

4. Again---avoidance. You're coming up with reasons that it IS ok to want a drink so badly you can't think of anything else and justifying getting drunk to avoid hurting other people. Why? Do you have impulses about hurting other people that can only be quelled by drinking? That seems problematic.

5. Hangovers are not necessarily part of drinking. If one drinks in moderation, most people do not have hangovers. If you have a hangover, that's a sign of alcohol poisoning and you definitely drank too much. If you think this is normal, then you do not have a good understanding of what normal drinking is.

6. Again, avoiding answering the question. These questions are not to be answered as applies to some generic person or across a population. The question is about YOU. Does YOUR drinking cause problems with YOUR friends and family? Should be a pretty easy yes/no/sometimes/maybe

7 OK

8. You seem to equate drinking and risky behavior with the way that people have fun. That might be problematic. Especially if you think people who don't drink a lot and then dive into pools at parties don't know how to have fun.

9. OK.

10. Avoidance again and blaming your 'Viking heritage?????'

11. The symptoms described in the question are not normally experienced by people who have a healthy, non-dependent relationship with alcohol. It sounds like you do experience withdrawal and that is a serious symptom of alcohol dependence. You also identified experiencing anxiety but it isn't clear if this is a symptom of alcohol withdrawal or a reason that you DO drink. If you have anxiety, as many, many people do, there might be safer and healthier ways for you to deal with this issue rather than risk your liver and your relationships.

 

[Smoker]

Ok thank you very much everyone for all the comments and replies. I think I'll give it a a rest for at least 3 months, or until we can get pregnant, and then maybe limit my drinking to about once a month to see if that works better.

 

[Harry Bosch]

I'll admit it, I'm a heavy drinker! But I only drink on the weekends on an athletic excursion type of trip (ski trip, fishing trip, kayaking, or hiking trip). I drink heavy on those types of outings with my friends.
Then, I'll drink a few beers (at most 3 or 4) when at a party at a friends house or at home. But I never drink outside of that. Never drink at home when I'm just with the family. Never drink alone. The only exception, is when my mother-in-law stays overstays her welcome when staying with us and I need a break! But that is very often. I used to go to a local pow-wow with a group of guys I grew up that really turned into heavy heavy drinking and drugs. But stay away now. I've noticed that I feel much better (sleep better also) on days that I don't drink anything.

 

[Elixir]

I find this interesting as a person who thought they were prone to addiction. Later in life, I realize now that I really am not prone to addiction at all. I have come to believe that the genetic component must play a much larger role than is generally thought.
There were times in my life when I could consume obscene quantities of cocaine and tequila, regularly and for months on end. And cigarettes. I avoided all opiates for fear of being addicted. I never really quit any of them, just stopped. First cocaine and freebase (I had been interested in chemistry and actually learned how to - and did - purify black market cocaine into pure flake) because they were expensive and had after-effects that I found unpleasant. Stopping coke destroyed my tolerance for alcohol, so alcohol consumption dropped to near nothing - again because of nasty after-effects, not because I decided to quit. I continued to smoke, but switched to cigars thinking it would give my lungs a break. When I quit smoking, that too was a non-event. I put a cigar in my designated smoking spot, and left it there for a few weeks in case I changed my mind about wanting to smoke it, but never did. Finally threw it away. I have learned over the years that I have very low tolerance for opiate-type painkillers. Every few years I throw out old one that were prescribed for injury, dental pain etc.. After one or two doses, the prospect of taking that shit seems worse than the pain, so I don't. The only habit that endures is pot, which I have always enjoyed. But the strength of modern weed is not such that one can sit around smoking it - at least the variety I have been growing. A hit or two in the evening is about all it takes. And quitting it for a week or a month or few is never an issue if I am traveling or otherwise preoccupied. I still like alcohol sometimes - last week I had a drink three days in a row. That was after zero alcohol for several months due to my inability to remember to go to the liquor store. It might be weeks before it occurs to me to have another drink, I don't know and am not concerned.

Anyhow, I see people struggling to get over addictions to ALL those things and have long felt some level of disdain for their inability to control their impulses. Now I am sure that those "impulses" are far stronger than any that I have ever felt, and must be rooted in some genetic proclivity. If addiction was more related to environmental conditions, I don't believe the struggle would be so great. When Harry says " I've noticed that I feel much better (sleep better also) on days that I don't drink anything" it tells me that he doesn't suffer the genetic form of addiction so much. In fact he says he only drinks on weekends etc., which I don't think would be that case if he was truly addicted, regardless of how heavily he drinks when he drinks. But some people are truly preoccupied with the object(s) of their addiction and do not suffer effects that are so undesirable as to overwhelm their urge to consume. I feel very sorry for such folks, and hear Smoker's plea for clarification as coming from a place of real dilemma.

Smoker, if you are concerned about the possibility of being an alcoholic, I don't think it's constructive to externalize the issue by holding yourself up to contrived metrics of addiction/non-addiction. If you are really wondering if you drink "too much", you must know that it's not a question for someone else to answer unless you know you ARE drinking too much, and are seeking an outside influence to get you to stop.
I wish there was a pill or something... maybe there will be, but it will probably be addictive.
As it is, the only thing that can overcome genetically rooted proclivities is your own will, reinforced by negative associations with alcohol and positive associations with abstinence. If you don't have those associations, there's no reason to stop or even reduce drinking. There must be some inkling of those associations currently operating in your psyche or you wouldn't be asking about it.

 

[Wiploc]

Am I drinking too much?

I have been a fan of drinking for a long time because I like to enjoy life and howl at the moon sometimes ...

Back when I was doing law, one of my clients, apropos of nothing, said indignantly, "You can't be charged with bad check if you didn't sign the check, can you?"

Me: "Sure, yes."

Client: "Why?"

Me: "Because of the part you didn't tell me."

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The part she hadn't told me:

- She stole the checks.

- She filled them out.

- She had someone else sign them.

- She cashed them.