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Flags Half Mast for National Bracket Tragedy

Jimmy Higgins

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LOUISVILLE, KY -- President Trump signed a declaration today declaring that flags shall be flown at half mast on Monday, the first day since the end of the 2nd round in the NCAA Tournament.

"Our nation has not seen darkness like this since the smoldering wreckage we witnessed on September 11th," noted a press release from the White House.

The weekend was already rocked to its core when #16 seed UMBC defeated #1 Virginia by 20 points on Friday. This was after plenty of upsets had ripped people's brackets to a point of being unrecognizable and more akin to a safety school list than a NCAA Tournament bracket.

Observers from the UN indicated that this was the worst condition they've witnessed in an NCAA Bracket ever. They noted parts of the West and Midwest in America were damaged, but what they saw in the South was what they considered a "calamity".

"It is important that we remain strong and vigilant," continued the White House press release. "Our thoughts and prayers are with those that have lost so much."
 
Fake news. Donald Trump correctly predicted the outcome of all the games this weekend. Not that the dishonest liberal media will ever report on that, of course.
 
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