excreationist
Married mouth-breather
On a "forever alone" group I posted
Their message:
Is part of the problem that the women seem to have old-fashioned values? (wanting to "take care of your man"?)
What do people think of men that have found a wife overseas?
If the focus is on finding a very young wife and the money involved then that is a problem.
A reply:Possible solution - overseas bride?
Some people I know have found a wife overseas - like my intellectual introverted uncle who visited China and found a lot of interested women - he chose an accountant.
Some of the best countries might be the Philippines (mostly Christian) and Thailand (mostly Buddhist). Apparently they like old fashioned values and often they don't mind a man who is quite a bit older.
I'm not sure if Russian brides lead to successful marriages as often though.
I personally didn't purse that possibility because I am turned off by bad English and I am broke so it might be harder for me to attract those women. (and I eventually found a wife)
My reply:Fair warning - people can easily figure out the arrangement. Like, it's really really obvious.
The post was removed and I am banned for 7 days.When I see my uncle I think "good for him!"
BTW for some people this might be the difference between having a young loving attractive wife or having a hard time even finding a girlfriend (that they are attracted to)
Their message:
My reply:We do not support the exploitation of women in mail order brides/seeking poor foreigners type situations. Do not post things like that.
Their reply:Hi I wasn't talking about "mail order brides" - my uncle just visited on his own and found interested women. I guess the "overseas bride" part of the title seemed like a mail order bride... well I had been promoting the idea of looking overseas in some of the comments but now I know to stop that. Sorry about that.
My reply:It's the same concept. Go to a poor country and offer them financial security that they could never get in their home. That's exploitation. Do you think those attractive young women would look at them twice if they were from the same country? Can you explain why not? Because it's not love.
Theirs:If you meet enough of these women I think in some cases there can be love. Perhaps it is similar to women who are attracted to billionaires? BTW in the case of my uncle he was very poor and the couple and their 3 daughters initially lived in the one bedroom. His wife worked very hard in a restaurant (and used to be an accountant). I think him and his wife are genuinely in love. I think in China she was getting older and men weren't really interested. Though I think in a lot of cases of "mail order brides" the woman gets divorced and looks for a better partner.
Me:You were discussing getting attractive young loyal brides when otherwise they couldn't get a partner. Were all of the attractive men killed in their country that they need to do this? Do jobs not exist in their country? Explain to me how these men aren't exploiting something and are getting beautiful young loyal women. Can you do that? Tell me how these beautiful young loyal girls weren't wanted by every man around and settled for these socially awkward and generally unattractive men. You know it's exploitation, not love. Is it live for some cases like your uncle? Yes, it sounds that way. Is that the norm? No, and that is what we need to worry about. It's prostitution to have a chance to not live in poverty and hoping there's no abuse. That's sad and sick.
If a guy visits those countries and meets women on his own (or does chat over a website) and finds a genuine connection I don't really see a problem..... perhaps because I know of a few guys who have done that.I don't think it is necessarily just about the money - it could be because these people are "Westerners".... e.g. from a book:
It’s not about confidence. Consider one study on race. Three people-- a white man, an Asian woman, and a Japanese man were seeking romance in Tokyo, so they posted personal ads seeking romance in the Tokyo Classified Ads, Japan’s largest free circulation publication. Within a few weeks, the Asian woman received close to two hundred replies to her personal ad, from men of all races. The white man received about 100 replies from interested Japanese women. The Japanese man received only two replies, both from men who had mistaken his name for a woman’s name.
anyway I see what you're saying that some people can be sad and sick....
Is part of the problem that the women seem to have old-fashioned values? (wanting to "take care of your man"?)
What do people think of men that have found a wife overseas?
If the focus is on finding a very young wife and the money involved then that is a problem.
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