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Parenting Megathread

rousseau

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Congrats!

I always thought sleep regression coincided with growth spurts, so it's not so much a regression per se, but rather the baby has higher metabolic needs (eats more, so consequently wakes more). In the early days we fed our son pretty much any time he cried. Sometimes it'd be something else, but it was rare.
 

Toni

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Sure but physical growth isn’t the only kind of growth spurt that happens. Some kids are better at going back to sleep on their own than others. For my kids, having a very relaxed routine helped get them down. In toddler years, as their need to sleep was shifting, and they were more aware that life went on outside of their bedrooms—and were mobile enough to do something about it, sometimes they had trouble staying in bed—or rather, we had trouble with them popping up wanting another story, drink, cuddle, bathroom and frankly whatever excuse they could come up with. For my kids, it was actually more helpful for doors to their bedroom to be left open so that they could hear the quiet sounds of the adult evening going in—music or television, pages turning in books, quiet conversation or the sounds of dishes being washed and the living room straightened. Nothing too exciting so they really weren’t missing out too much. At different ages, sometimes one of us needed to be very near the bedroom, so they could see or hear us. I would make a big (but very quiet) show of putting away laundry, for example, taking multiple trips past their open doors. And for a couple, I sometimes sat in the floor outside their bedroom, quietly reading, so they could see me and hear me. There was a week ir two with each of them where there was a lot of bounce back to bed routines. We just tried to make it as quiet and as boring —and as matter of fact as possible, it kept the excitement from being fed and didn’t provide any motivation to stay awake to see what the Grownups were up to: just boring stuff…

Which reminds me of when our oldest successfully lobbied for a 10 pm bedtime. He was so excited! And sorely disappointed that there was no special exciting adult magic going on.
 

rousseau

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I was mainly just noting what we found with our infant. IIRC, in the first year they can't really be overfed, a parents main job is pumping them full of milk and transitioning them to solids (flavour window and baby led weaning!). Once they're firmly past one year old the equation changes as their growth slows significantly. Maybe around 9 - 11 months is the time to start nudging them away from night feeds, but at the very least no earlier than 4 months. Opinions will vary.

In my experience the term 'sleep regression' can be pernicious as many parents misunderstand it as 'why won't my baby sleep' when it's really 'my baby is actually just hungry'.
 

rousseau

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Sure but physical growth isn’t the only kind of growth spurt that happens. Some kids are better at going back to sleep on their own than others. For my kids, having a very relaxed routine helped get them down. In toddler years, as their need to sleep was shifting, and they were more aware that life went on outside of their bedrooms—and were mobile enough to do something about it, sometimes they had trouble staying in bed—or rather, we had trouble with them popping up wanting another story, drink, cuddle, bathroom and frankly whatever excuse they could come up with. For my kids, it was actually more helpful for doors to their bedroom to be left open so that they could hear the quiet sounds of the adult evening going in—music or television, pages turning in books, quiet conversation or the sounds of dishes being washed and the living room straightened. Nothing too exciting so they really weren’t missing out too much. At different ages, sometimes one of us needed to be very near the bedroom, so they could see or hear us. I would make a big (but very quiet) show of putting away laundry, for example, taking multiple trips past their open doors. And for a couple, I sometimes sat in the floor outside their bedroom, quietly reading, so they could see me and hear me. There was a week ir two with each of them where there was a lot of bounce back to bed routines. We just tried to make it as quiet and as boring —and as matter of fact as possible, it kept the excitement from being fed and didn’t provide any motivation to stay awake to see what the Grownups were up to: just boring stuff…

Which reminds me of when our oldest successfully lobbied for a 10 pm bedtime. He was so excited! And sorely disappointed that there was no special exciting adult magic going on.

This turned out to be a timely post as our son just made a huge shift in the past week. For months we had a consistent and predictable routine, but now he seems to be doing similar as you mention. He knows he can push to stay up later, and from what I can tell just wants to be with us after he's gone down.
 
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