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So, How's That Rapture Going?

Ford

Ford

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Just don't knock on my door on a Saturday Morning
18 years ago I had a very long conversation with a very sincere young Christian man who was very much convinced that the time we were living in (a couple years before the Millennium) was pretty much all she wrote for humanity.

The Anti-Christ was alive and well (in France, if I remember correctly) and in short order President Bill Clinton was going to usher in the Armageddon, leading to the return of one Jesus H. Christ.

I've lost touch with this young man to put it mildly, but I wonder if anyone else has kept in touch with those who insisted that the year 2000 would herald the Second Coming, and how they've managed to cope with the lack of Biblical fulfillment.


I mean, what's the response when your Savior fails to materialize on your schedule?
 
Malintent said:
Kharakov said:
Are you saying Jesus is on dealer time?
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No, the "young man" the OP was referring to was saying that. The question is, "what are they saying now that they are demonstratedly wrong" (as usual)?
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Exactly.

The guy I was talking to back then would be middle aged now...mid 40s for sure. He figured (and had ample Bible reasoning to back it up) that the Rapture would come before he hit 30.

I wonder if he now thinks he was wrong, or if he's still thinking the Return 'O Jesus is just around the corner.
 
Ford said:
18 years ago I had a very long conversation with a very sincere young Christian man who was very much convinced that the time we were living in (a couple years before the Millennium) was pretty much all she wrote for humanity.

The Anti-Christ was alive and well (in France, if I remember correctly) and in short order President Bill Clinton was going to usher in the Armageddon, leading to the return of one Jesus H. Christ.

I've lost touch with this young man to put it mildly, but I wonder if anyone else has kept in touch with those who insisted that the year 2000 would herald the Second Coming, and how they've managed to cope with the lack of Biblical fulfillment.


I mean, what's the response when your Savior fails to materialize on your schedule?
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I think it's kinda like the lady inside my Garmin anytime I stop off during a trip: "Recalculating". This seems to be the method, just pick a new date. Maybe Jesus stopped off at the Holiday Inn Express. It could be awhile in great big Jesus time.

I used to use Jesus H. Christ as an exclamation. If anyone asked what the "H" stood for I would tell them Julio.
 
Malintent said:
Kharakov said:
Ford said:
I mean, what's the response when your Savior fails to materialize on your schedule?
Click to expand...
Are you saying Jesus is on dealer time?
Click to expand...

No, the "young man" the OP was referring to was saying that. The question is, "what are they saying now that they are demonstratedly wrong" (as usual)?
Click to expand...

No, no, no. I meant that that is the response that the person would give. On a side note, I totally get the feeling that the last thing you said is a deliberate meta-joke about certain people usually misinterpreting what I say.


If I was a miser, I would hide what I interpret within myself, and be a deliberate misinterpreter.

 
Ford said:
18 years ago I had a very long conversation with a very sincere young Christian man who was very much convinced that the time we were living in (a couple years before the Millennium) was pretty much all she wrote for humanity.

The Anti-Christ was alive and well (in France, if I remember correctly) and in short order President Bill Clinton was going to usher in the Armageddon, leading to the return of one Jesus H. Christ.

I've lost touch with this young man to put it mildly, but I wonder if anyone else has kept in touch with those who insisted that the year 2000 would herald the Second Coming, and how they've managed to cope with the lack of Biblical fulfillment.


I mean, what's the response when your Savior fails to materialize on your schedule?
Click to expand...

If Christians weren't able to resolve this bit of cognitive dissonance, Christianity would have dried up and blown away centuries ago. I'm sure your friend is still convinced that the second coming will happen any moment now, just as Christians have believed ever since Jesus originally promised that it would happen within the lifespans of those who knew him in the flesh.
 
Underseer said:
Ford said:
18 years ago I had a very long conversation with a very sincere young Christian man who was very much convinced that the time we were living in (a couple years before the Millennium) was pretty much all she wrote for humanity.

The Anti-Christ was alive and well (in France, if I remember correctly) and in short order President Bill Clinton was going to usher in the Armageddon, leading to the return of one Jesus H. Christ.

I've lost touch with this young man to put it mildly, but I wonder if anyone else has kept in touch with those who insisted that the year 2000 would herald the Second Coming, and how they've managed to cope with the lack of Biblical fulfillment.


I mean, what's the response when your Savior fails to materialize on your schedule?
Click to expand...

If Christians weren't able to resolve this bit of cognitive dissonance, Christianity would have dried up and blown away centuries ago. I'm sure your friend is still convinced that the second coming will happen any moment now, just as Christians have believed ever since Jesus originally promised that it would happen within the lifespans of those who knew him in the flesh.
Click to expand...

This. They just shrug and say "No one knows the time or day" and "Jesus isn't on our schedule" and that easily does away with any deadlines.
 
credoconsolans said:
Underseer said:
If Christians weren't able to resolve this bit of cognitive dissonance, Christianity would have dried up and blown away centuries ago. I'm sure your friend is still convinced that the second coming will happen any moment now, just as Christians have believed ever since Jesus originally promised that it would happen within the lifespans of those who knew him in the flesh.
Click to expand...

This. They just shrug and say "No one knows the time or day" and "Jesus isn't on our schedule" and that easily does away with any deadlines.
Click to expand...

I'm working on gospel time these days...

"Almost Gothic" -- Steely Dan

I think that means 'not actually working'.
 
Rapture isn't a Biblical term. It was cooked up in the 1830s, at a time when spelling rules were much looser. I think it's at least possible they were going for Rupture, a more utilized word. If you are suddenly sucked up into the sky from whatever you were doing -- zero gravity plus dizzying speed -- you're probably in for a rupture. Eardrums certainly, but there are other delicate spots. A lot of guys will need new inner tubes in the scrotum, and ladies may find that they've broken a gasket in their vaginas. The Mormons may be on to something with that reinforced holy underwear. I recommend wearing double layers of LDS holy garments if you hear that Franklin Graham or Joyce Meyer were seen scooting into the clouds. I'm headed in the opposite direction, so I hope to have time to get a Big Gulp with extra ice.
 
Eschatology, the study of end times, predates Christianity. Any belief system which has a creation story is very likely to have a destruction story as well. There are always people who think they have cracked the code and can predict when everything goes south. The one thing all these predictions have in common is, the end is coming within the lifetime of the predictor, or at the very end of his lifetime. While many have calculated it down to the day and hour, no one has ever declared we have 345 years to repent.
 
Tigers! said:
I remember this thread. Nearly 10 years without a response.

Is that a forum record?
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I know, right?

I'm waiting for the time a couple years from now when I can ask Trump supporters: "So, how's that whole 'Hillary for Prison 2016' thing working out for ya?"
 
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