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Against My Will

alwmjohnson

New member
Joined
Oct 3, 2018
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0
Location
Indianapolis, Indiana
Basic Beliefs
Naturalist
I was raised a Roman Catholic. That is raised, not born! There is a huge difference between being born with a trait and being conditioned to a belief. We are born with hair color, eye features, skeletal structure, etc. but not to religious beliefs. We are taught the beliefs of a religion and that education usually comes from our parents and the religion they belong to. I attended 12-years of Catholic schooling. I was initially completely receptive to whatever the nuns and priests taught. Like many good Catholic boys I thought of becoming a priest. To think if I had entered the priesthood, I would have opened a door to an emotional, psychological, and spiritual rat-hole. I would have entombed myself in a repressive and depressive bottomless pit, an endless maze with little hope of escape. I am fortunate I have a rebellious streak in me, and I was able to be open-minded, skeptically-minded and broad-minded enough to ask many questions. Today I look back on those religious beliefs, those stamped-in doctrines as repellant, unimaginable, and fantastical. I was taught (against my will) about venial sins and those mortal sins that could send me to a Draconian Hell for Eternity. But there was a purgatory I could go to where my sins could be expunged away. I vividly remember at the age of seven being told by a nun that if I ate a piece of meat on Friday and died that night --> I will burn in Hell forever. To underscore how ridiculous this can be in a child’s mind, one Friday I consumed vegetable soup. After swallowing the soup my sister told me the label said there were beef balls in the soup. Wow! I had committed a mortal sin. I begged God to not let me die that night so I would not go to Hell. I was taught about original sin, virgin births, winged angels, the evils of sex, and on and on. I was taught the dualistic concepts of heaven/hell, saints/sinners, and good/evil. A young gullible mind can be tainted and trained to believe the unbelieveable --> to think the unthinkable. Unconscionably, this Pre-reformation nonsense was being promulgated and indoctrinated into the minds of 20th Century children. Why, tell me why would any religion that taught there is a loving God burden the mind of a child (or adult with a childish mind) with such asinine beliefs? Why are so many Christians unchristian? Why are they so angry, hateful, bigoted, fearful, and burdened with a schadenfreude trait towards anyone daring to differ with them theologically? I was first visited with religious wrath by a nun when I was 16. I was a junior at St. James High School, and a friend of mine and I skipped out of Mass. Sr. John Mary caught us, and stupid concrete thinking me said we were looking for our books in the bushes. That “Christian” made my life miserable for the rest of the year with her dirty judgmental stares. Unlucky me had her for my algebra teacher that year. Looking back on it now I think this was one of the initial cracks, and the beginning of the end that instituted my rebellion, nullification, and final deliverance from a supernatural worldview.
 
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