God just told me who will win the 2016 Super Bowl

[funinspace]

But you will have to wait until February 8th, 2016 before I tell you who it is.

Holy Zeus...so many fuckwits, so little time. What a marvel of prophecy this Rick Joyner shill is, and to think that his audience doesn't consider him a comedy channel.
http://www.patheos.com/blogs/dispatches/2015/09/04/god-rick-joyners-bookie/

Rick Joyner, self-appointed prophet of God who claims to speak to the almighty on a daily basis, says that God helped him handicap the NFL playoffs last year by telling him that the New England Patriots were going to win the Super Bowl and that this would be a “prophetic message that patriotism is going to win” as well. But he didn’t tell anyone because he didn’t want anyone to gamble on this sure thing.

 

[Tom Sawyer]

Ya, God also told me that the Pats were going to win last year. And by "God", I do of course mean "basic reasoning skills".

They're also going to repeat if their receivers can manage to stay healthy and they don't end up in a playoff game against New York. That one comes from Vishnu.

 

[TSwizzle]

I don't think god can be trusted when it comes to sporting events. I think god may have had a hand in last night's blocked field goal attempt by the Browns as I heard Will Hill say after the game he was praying for a block on the kick and god answered that prayer.

 

[ideologyhunter]

Can God make a football so big and heavy that he himself can't kick it?
Sorry - George Carlin did that much better.

 

[Colonel Sanders]

I like what God told him about the Panthers too.

God reportedly told Joyner “don’t give up on the Panthers,” which Joyner interpreted to mean that the Panthers would not have a very good year but “it could end up good,” which is exactly what happened when the team made it into the playoffs despite having a losing record and even won a Wild Card game.

That is some rock solid prophesying right there. It's the kind of detailed, fact specific prediction that could only come from a divine source.
I hear that he's going to predict that a team from the east coast, possibly the west coast, or possibly somewhere in between in going to win the World Series next year. I'll just wait and see, but I have faith in the accuracy of that prediction... unless Toronto is Satan's favorite team. It probably is.

 

[hurtinbuckaroo]

I don't think god can be trusted when it comes to sporting events. I think god may have had a hand in last night's blocked field goal attempt by the Browns as I heard Will Hill say after the game he was praying for a block on the kick and god answered that prayer.

I think "Hand of God" happened in the other football. Although it does give me a warm feeling to know that 70,000 Browns fans think God ignored their pleas for mercy.

 

[Tom Sawyer]

I don't think god can be trusted when it comes to sporting events. I think god may have had a hand in last night's blocked field goal attempt by the Browns as I heard Will Hill say after the game he was praying for a block on the kick and god answered that prayer.

I think "Hand of God" happened in the other football. Although it does give me a warm feeling to know that 70,000 Browns fans think God ignored their pleas for mercy.

In God's defence, these are the Cleveland Browns we're talking about. Even an omnipotent guy can only do so much.

 

[TSwizzle]

Obviously god is a cheesehead.