Jimmy Higgins
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DES MOINES, IA -- Already shaken by a deplorable breakdown in handling the aggregation of election results, Iowa shook the nation even more when a top leader of the Iowa Democrat Party announced that President Trump had won the Caucus.
A visibly shaken up and bruised Tom Mitchelson, Iowa Democrat Committee leader, read from a statement indicating that while it was "unusual" for a Republican to win the Democrat Caucus, clearly the Democrats of Iowa were "enamored" by the "President's great leadership and handling of the economy".
Mitchelson went on to note that "We are experiencing the best economy in American history. Who else would the Democrats vote for? Sleepy Biden? Pocahontas?"
Mitchelson did not respond to any questions from the Press. While the outcome of the Caucus has been delayed, there were no indications from any reporters or Caucus attendees that the President was represented or voted for. Additionally, Mitchelson's spokesperson would not answer questions regarding the peculiar "Trump-like" comments he made in his statement.
Democrat nominees had not yet released statements regarding the alleged victory of Donald Trump in the Democrat Caucus.
A visibly shaken up and bruised Tom Mitchelson, Iowa Democrat Committee leader, read from a statement indicating that while it was "unusual" for a Republican to win the Democrat Caucus, clearly the Democrats of Iowa were "enamored" by the "President's great leadership and handling of the economy".
Mitchelson went on to note that "We are experiencing the best economy in American history. Who else would the Democrats vote for? Sleepy Biden? Pocahontas?"
Mitchelson did not respond to any questions from the Press. While the outcome of the Caucus has been delayed, there were no indications from any reporters or Caucus attendees that the President was represented or voted for. Additionally, Mitchelson's spokesperson would not answer questions regarding the peculiar "Trump-like" comments he made in his statement.
Democrat nominees had not yet released statements regarding the alleged victory of Donald Trump in the Democrat Caucus.