Alkaline Water?!

[Jimmy Higgins]

So, I was in search of a filtered water pitcher that doesn't spill (apparently like god, it doesn't exist), and stumbled onto a very well reviewed pitcher that called itself an alkaline water pitcher. It's filter dumps alkaline minerals in the filter process and bases up the water. What I found more impressive was the claim to "shrink water molecules" via microclustering. This definitely got my attention as I was curious how a filter could shrink something at a molecular level. I had also never heard of "microclustering" before.

They claim that by putting minerals in the water, the clusters of water molecules are smaller, therefore a smaller molecule. I'll just need to take their word for it I guess. Who'd lie about such a thing?

But I was also curious about the alkaline water thing. This is allegedly healthier water. I know some mineral waters from natural springs were used as medicines back in the day, and it could be possible that some of them could potentially provide a benefit, but basic water? Health food? Well, the picture of the family in the advertising certainly seemed to indicate they were happy and healthy. So can I really disagree with that sort of empirical evidence?

 

[Toni]

So, I was in search of a filtered water pitcher that doesn't spill (apparently like god, it doesn't exist), and stumbled onto a very well reviewed pitcher that called itself an alkaline water pitcher. It's filter dumps alkaline minerals in the filter process and bases up the water. What I found more impressive was the claim to "shrink water molecules" via microclustering. This definitely got my attention as I was curious how a filter could shrink something at a molecular level. I had also never heard of "microclustering" before.

They claim that by putting minerals in the water, the clusters of water molecules are smaller, therefore a smaller molecule. I'll just need to take their word for it I guess. Who'd lie about such a thing?

But I was also curious about the alkaline water thing. This is allegedly healthier water. I know some mineral waters from natural springs were used as medicines back in the day, and it could be possible that some of them could potentially provide a benefit, but basic water? Health food? Well, the picture of the family in the advertising certainly seemed to indicate they were happy and healthy. So can I really disagree with that sort of empirical evidence?

I found this on a google search. I have no idea how reliable this site is but I think it's at least as good as the happy healthy family based evidence from your ads:
Plus my link has some good links contained.
https://sciencebasedmedicine.org/alkaline-water-surges-despite-lack-of-evidence/

The body maintains a very narrow pH (7-7.4), which is the range at which the chemical reactions that keep us alive are optimal. If the pH strays outside this range, you will indeed become acutely ill. For this reason animals have evolved a host of powerful mechanisms to keep the blood and tissues within this very narrow pH. For example, our kidneys will produce urine that is more or less acidic to help balance pH.

Also, since carbon dioxide is acidic, we can maintain a specific pH in the blood just by varying how much we breathe and blow off CO2. In fact, our respiratory rate is determined primarily by the amount of CO2 in the blood – not oxygen. The concentration of CO2 can be adjusted moment to moment, and of course occurs involuntarily without our conscious input.

These mechanisms for maintaining a narrow range of pH (in a healthy person) overwhelm the effect of whatever you eat or drink. The only exception to this are serious acute medical conditions that affect pH, or consuming poisons that affect your pH. Consuming regular food and liquids, regardless of their pH, will simply not affect the pH of your body. Therefore the entire premise of an alkaline diet or alkaline water is pure BS, nothing but pseudoscience.

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/27297008

CONCLUSIONS:
Despite the promotion of the alkaline diet and alkaline water by the media and salespeople, there is almost no actual research to either support or disprove these ideas. This systematic review of the literature revealed a lack of evidence for or against diet acid load and/or alkaline water for the initiation or treatment of cancer. Promotion of alkaline diet and alkaline water to the public for cancer prevention or treatment is not justified.

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/21529374

RESULTS:
Fifty-five of 238 studies met the inclusion criteria: 22 randomized interventions, 2 meta-analyses, and 11 prospective observational studies of bone health outcomes including: urine calcium excretion, calcium balance or retention, changes of bone mineral density, or fractures, among healthy adults in which acid and/or alkaline intakes were manipulated or observed through foods or supplements; and 19 in vitro cell studies which examined the hypothesized mechanism. Urine calcium excretion rates were consistent with osteoporosis development; however calcium balance studies did not demonstrate loss of whole body calcium with higher net acid excretion. Several weaknesses regarding the acid-ash hypothesis were uncovered: No intervention studies provided direct evidence of osteoporosis progression (fragility fractures, or bone strength as measured using biopsy). The supporting prospective cohort studies were not controlled regarding important osteoporosis risk factors including: weight loss during follow-up, family history of osteoporosis, baseline bone mineral density, and estrogen status. No study revealed a biologic mechanism functioning at physiological pH. Finally, randomized studies did not provide evidence for an adverse role of phosphate, milk, and grain foods in osteoporosis.

CONCLUSIONS:
A causal association between dietary acid load and osteoporotic bone disease is not supported by evidence and there is no evidence that an alkaline diet is protective of bone health.

 

[bigfield]

I had also never heard of "microclustering" before.

Sounds like a silicon valley management fad.

Swarms of slightly-bewildered coders shuffling around a room with no furniture, carrying their macbooks in front of them in $3000 harnesses, periodically coalescing into groups, typing frantically (but collaboratively) for a couple of minutes before high-fiving and scattering to begin the process anew. Interns move through the room, handing out avocado smoothies.

 

[Keith&Co.]

Gwyneth Paltrow has a line of alkaline water...

https://flowhydration.com/pages/gwyneth-paltrow

I notice one of the offerings is lemon-flavored. And grapefruit, also.

I must admit that chemistry class was a long, long time ago, but doesn't adding citric acid to alkaline sort of erase any benefits the water might bestow ?

 

[Jimmy Higgins]

You got me. Their lemon one indicates "No sugar, no juice, no calories, no artificial sweeteners and no GMOs". Then where in the heck is the lemon flavor coming from?!

I appreciate Paltrow as an actor, but if she sells something, it likely is bogus.

 

[Toni]

You got me. Their lemon one indicates "No sugar, no juice, no calories, no artificial sweeteners and no GMOs". Then where in the heck is the lemon flavor coming from?!

I appreciate Paltrow as an actor, but if she sells something, it likely is bogus.

I agree re: Paltrow on both counts. I haven’t looked at her line of anything but stevia is a plant based sweetener that is often considered ‘natural’ and is 200s of times sweeter than sugar.

 

[thebeave]

Just drink tap water (unless you live in Flint, Mich of course!). Its free.

 

[Keith&Co.]

Just drink tap water (unless you live in Flint, Mich of course!). Its free.

Well, of course i drink tap water, but if i hang out with my trendy friends i need to drink it from a designer label, and i want to be able to talk about it intelligently. If i say "I like my alkaline water with just a spritz of lime," and one of them is a chemistry major, or married to one, and they beat me to death with an avocado pit, will it be justified, or will i be vindicated in the instant replay?

 

[Jimmy Higgins]

Just drink tap water (unless you live in Flint, Mich of course!). Its free.

Well, of course i drink tap water, but if i hang out with my trendy friends i need to drink it from a designer label, and i want to be able to talk about it intelligently. If i say "I like my alkaline water with just a spritz of lime," and one of them is a chemistry major, or married to one, and they beat me to death with an avocado pit, will it be justified, or will i be vindicated in the instant replay?

People don't vaccinate their children because of what an MTV VJ claims... so you should be safe by just saying Paltrow said it is healthy. And if they dare question that, you always have the out of "Well... that is your​ opinion."

 

[Loren Pechtel]

You got me. Their lemon one indicates "No sugar, no juice, no calories, no artificial sweeteners and no GMOs". Then where in the heck is the lemon flavor coming from?!

I appreciate Paltrow as an actor, but if she sells something, it likely is bogus.

That list doesn't include "artificial flavors". Obviously it has artificial lemon flavor.

 

[jonatha]

You got me. Their lemon one indicates "No sugar, no juice, no calories, no artificial sweeteners and no GMOs". Then where in the heck is the lemon flavor coming from?!

I appreciate Paltrow as an actor, but if she sells something, it likely is bogus.

That list doesn't include "artificial flavors". Obviously it has artificial lemon flavor.

Small microclusters give you lemon flavor. Larger ones make grapefruit.

Really small ones taste like tangerine...

 

[Jimmy Higgins]

You got me. Their lemon one indicates "No sugar, no juice, no calories, no artificial sweeteners and no GMOs". Then where in the heck is the lemon flavor coming from?!

I appreciate Paltrow as an actor, but if she sells something, it likely is bogus.

That list doesn't include "artificial flavors". Obviously it has artificial lemon flavor.

Yeah. I flipped from sweeteners to flavors.

 

[thebeave]

A quick and easy way to find out if something is a scam is to peruse the aisles at Whole Foods and see if its stocked on their shelves.

 

[Jimmy Higgins]

I’m talking about a water filter for a water container, not a bottled water sold in stores.

Their filter actually adds alkaline metals to the water to make it basic. I was confused by the ‘shrinking’ of water molecules statement (that shouldn’t be possible forget verifiable) as well as why would basic water be better. The science says it isn’t.

I was surprised this was a think to begin with. I ponder who came up with the idea and how they knew people would buy into it, like a $400 Apple watch.

Oh wait... nevermind.