Is it unethical or immoral to not tell someone else you're contagious?

[abaddon]

So again, how would you feel if someone came up to see you, and then were told to leave a day later because of the possibility of infection? They might feel used, resentful, they might be just as angry at the loss of funds during the holiday season. Changing your airfare dates during the holiday season to leave is no small thing, and I was not in any financial position to help compensate them. I think my main line of thinking was to give them the holiday we'd planned for regardless of my condition.

“Told to leave”. … So, the question is, how would I feel if someone was asshole enough to tell me what to do instead of just simply discuss things forthrightly with me? That’s your question?

There’s nothing realistic in your tale about anyone telling anybody to leave, it’s just rationalizing your unethical behavior away.

I’ve answered you fully, and am done.

 

[Treedbear]

So again, how would you feel if someone came up to see you, and then were told to leave a day later because of the possibility of infection? They might feel used, resentful, they might be just as angry at the loss of funds during the holiday season. Changing your airfare dates during the holiday season to leave is no small thing, and I was not in any financial position to help compensate them. I think my main line of thinking was to give them the holiday we'd planned for regardless of my condition.

...
There’s nothing realistic in your tale about anyone telling anybody to leave, it’s just rationalizing your unethical behavior away.
...

That's a very astute observation. As to whether it's unethical I still think it comes down to what his friend would reasonably expect him to do. He can probably just ask himself what he would think if the situation was reversed. In western society we probably wouldn't expect someone (at work, say, or at the grocery store) to extend that courtesy. Each individual has to maintain a level of caution. Between friends we usually expect different rules of behavior. But maybe not in this case. I can't tell him what those rules are.

 

[credoconsolans]

So again, how would you feel if someone came up to see you, and then were told to leave a day later because of the possibility of infection? They might feel used, resentful, they might be just as angry at the loss of funds during the holiday season. Changing your airfare dates during the holiday season to leave is no small thing, and I was not in any financial position to help compensate them. I think my main line of thinking was to give them the holiday we'd planned for regardless of my condition.

“Told to leave”. … So, the question is, how would I feel if someone was asshole enough to tell me what to do instead of just simply discuss things forthrightly with me? That’s your question?

There’s nothing realistic in your tale about anyone telling anybody to leave, it’s just rationalizing your unethical behavior away.

I’ve answered you fully, and am done.

Being told to leave would be phrased more like, "I'm sorry, I've come down really sick and I can hardly stand up, let alone socialize or talk. It'd probably be better if you went home. I won't be able to do anything this weekend."

Point made. There is no discussion to be had. One person is so sick, they can hardly stand up. What else could the other person rationalize doing?


P.S.

Heard from my friend. They are still sick going on almost 3 weeks now. Says they have severe bronchial inflammation.

Feeling better that I probably DIDN'T infect them because all I had was a nasty head cold.

 

[Jolly_Penguin]

It's amazing the difference in etiquette you see between western and eastern societies. Maybe it's not as typical as it appears on TV but it seems the asians all wear masks when they have a cold so they don't spread their germs as much. Perhaps bowing rather than a hand shake might have become their tradition for the same reason. In the west the standard seems to be you are under no obligation to look out for the community's health. And the idea of shaking hands as a sign of trust needs to be taken with a grain of salt.

This is a good point. Could it have something to do with Asians being more concentrated in population density? An unguarded cold would pass much faster in Japan than in Canada.

 

[Jolly_Penguin]

The choice was not gone. Infected/not infected is not where the choice happens. The choice was stolen when you lied and said it was allergies.

I pretty much agree.

I would not say "the choice was stolen" (as I'm not sure you have an absolute moral obligation to give them that choice).

But I do agree that it would have been better to tell them once you knew. Even if they already caught the infection that first day, they would at least have some warning that they may have caught something and adjusted accordingly.

 

[Jolly_Penguin]

I don't mention hepatitis until a few weeks of fornication have passed. They usually get over it and we have a laugh about it. If I mention it right out the gate, potential for sex drops dramatically. People don't understand the disease.

This should be classed as attempted murder.

I tend to agree. How about something less dangerous like HPV or less dangerous than that but still nasty, like crabs?

 

[jab]

A friend came to visit me from 500 miles away.

I was the only reason this person was in town. We planned a long weekend together.

The day after this person arrived I came down with a horrible cold.

I did not tell this person. What could I say? "Oh, thanks for coming, but now you need to turn around and go back home?"

I drugged myself up and managed to pass off my sinus-y sounds as 'allergies' and spent time with this person in close proximity.

Sure enough, after going home, within the normal incubation period of a rhinovirus, my friend came down ill.

Only thinking it was just allergies or mild, continued with their sports and then ended up in the ER deathly ill with bronchitis that doctors thought might have been pneumonia.

This person was normally healthy and athletic and in shape. Not immune suppressed or anything like that.

Should I have said something once I DID come down with something? It might have already been too late since the day they arrived, I still felt fine and we hung out.

It was just a bad cold that I was over in a week.

Thoughts?

yes, you should have said something.

 

[DolphinDynasty]

This should be classed as attempted murder.

I tend to agree. How about something less dangerous like HPV or less dangerous than that but still nasty, like crabs?

Depends on which type of Hepatitis, as C is very different than B, where C IS only transmittable by blood to blood yet B is present in semen vaginal fluid and blood, and A is more akin to a flu for a week usually transmitted via tainted food with a cough or sneeze right into someone's face as secondary. Plus treatment length including the current meds for Hep C, as we now have meds regime so close to a cure as possible, which itself is so rare its something I heavily researched. So it is Another1 who is correct, blood to blood contact is the only mode any doctor researching it has found. It isn't just unprotected sex but highly risqué to a violent point that they see it involving sex. This is also why they phrase the exploratory data that way when looking for the precursor, followed by researching for blood transfusions, surgeries, and last if all others don't add up they'll look for work in healthcare if it might mean needles involved.

Now Hep B has no treatment and both Hep B and C can after decades of infection, because it moves through blood, begin to effect the kidneys, and other organs, not just the liver. And then there's also Hepatitis D, G, F none of which are life threatening or long lasting. Not actually remembering if I came across an E cuz my brain thinks there was an odd skip, but maybe it was that E was found to have died out? I'll have to look into it I suppose.

I think the OP, as they had no idea for 24 hrs, which was also the highest window of carry-over to another person since it starts at point of infection, not first day of symptoms, probably did not pass anything to their friend given how long it took their friend to take ill. A "head" or sinus infection doesn't fit with nor can it develop into bronchitis let alone the heightened prognosis. Now the flu or a chest cold could become bronchitis but that's different illnesses with different strains than those that affect sinuses. As long as the friend is making progress, it's all I'd be wondering about.