Man Who Talks For Living Says Retired Soldier Hates Country She Served

[Jimmy Higgins]

WASHINGTON DC -- A man who makes a living by talking a lot on television and has never served in the military claimed a retired soldier hates America. The retired soldier lost her legs in a place where America was fighting a war that was full heartedly supported by the man who made a living by talking a lot. The helicopter she was co-piloting was struck by a rocket propelled grenade. It is uncertain where the man who makes a living by talking a lot was when the incident occurred, but it was almost certainly not in that place where he advocated fighting a war.

The retired soldier, now a US Senator, had been advocating about opening discussions regarding statues of the nation's founding fathers. Expressing her opinion about having a dialogue led the man who makes a living by talking a lot to suggest she hates the country (she was serving when she lost both of her legs fighting in a war he supported a lot but forgot to volunteer for).

Supporters of the man who talks a lot for a living were not critical of him and agreed that the soldier probably hates America because she believes in discussing things that people disagree with.

 

[Worldtraveller]

Sorry Jimmy. Like the Onion, a lot of this stuff isn't really funny because, well it's real.

 

[fromderinside]

Things were better when man who talks for a living only dressed as the clown. Now he be one, Jeebee.

 

[Jimmy Higgins]

Sorry Jimmy. Like the Onion, a lot of this stuff isn't really funny because, well it's real.

What? Should someone throw a pie?

This article is pretty much 100% accurate, it just uses a few metaphors to accentuate the madness.

 

[Keith&Co.]

I seem to be behind on headlines right at the moment.
Is the talk-for-a-living guy a draft dodger? Or should i ask which draft dodger you mean?

 

[marc]

I seem to be behind on headlines right at the moment.
Is the talk-for-a-living guy a draft dodger? Or should i ask which draft dodger you mean?

This talk-for-a-living-frozen-food guy accused the veteran of hating America. Partially it seems because she might be a contender for Biden's VP pick? You know, get to smearing her ahead of time.

 

[Jimmy Higgins]

I seem to be behind on headlines right at the moment.
Is the talk-for-a-living guy a draft dodger? Or should i ask which draft dodger you mean?

I think Tucker Carlson is young enough to not have dodged any drafts. But on the other hand, he was pretty pro-Iraq War... and shitting on the reputation of a person that lost two legs (in combat!) while fighting the Iraq War while he was shilling on television for W Admin about how the media was overblowing the bad stuff and not talking enough about painting schools, makes him a Grade "Royal" asshole.

 

[Keith&Co.]

I seem to be behind on headlines right at the moment.
Is the talk-for-a-living guy a draft dodger? Or should i ask which draft dodger you mean?

I think Tucker Carlson

Ah.
I didn't know itf it was Tucker or Rush or FuckFace von Clownstick.

 

[ZiprHead]

No, Tucker never served. He had a very privileged upbringing.