The First Male Has Been Arrested For “Manspreading” In NYC

[Jarhyn]

I was a victim of manspreading on a recent flight from Gold Coast to Canberra.

I managed to get control of the armrest by getting seated first but my neighbour used manspreading to encroach his knee 1 inch into my personal seat-space

Thus forcing me to try and keep my knee away from his knee to avoid the dreaded man-on-man knee-touch which is even worse than the elbow nudge

I wish I could afford to fly business.

This is where it pays to be gay. Or just be really comfortable with making complete strangers feel really UNcomfortable. Tenderly glance at the manspreader, and his knee that is touching yours and rub Hus knee with your own in a clearly intentional way, flirt with him, and ask him if he wants to go back to your hotel room when the plane lands so you can (insert a really gross/obscure/squick fetish here).

If he takes offense and keeps doing it, say "hey, not my fault you gave the 'signal'! Don't you know that's the signal for 'I want you to (do thing) with me'?'

 

[Rhea]

That doesn't work for females, though. However, Dr. Zoidberg has offered up the perfect female plan.

I shall instead start talking very loudly about various products and strategies a man can use to avoid squeezing his nutsack between meaty thighs. I expect this could be quite fun. "I notice you are sitting with your knees so wide apart they intrude into the space of your neighbor. If you find it difficult to bring your knees close enough together to be polite, for example if the skin on your nutsack sags and gets pinched between your meaty thighs, "

remember I will say this nice and clearly, and loudly,

"I have heard that wearing briefs can help alleviate it. Some men also find that bringing their thighs together before sitting down brings the package up and forward, reducing the risk of sweaty or itchy compression. For severe cases, some men struggle between adjusting their penis and balls in public or just imposing on their neighbors, making instead the neighbor uncomfortable and compressed into small spaces. It would be useful for you to know that I would prefer you to reach down and grab your sack and adjust it in whatever way is necessary for you to be able to stay in your own space."

I'll pause here,

"Some people find this an odd topic, possibly uncomfortable and disturbing. Oddly, those same people find nothing wrong with crowding others in public places and pressing against them. I personally find that talking about your penis and balls is less odious than having you sit with your knees so wide that they push me over. What do you think of this?"

 

[dismal]

"Some people find this an odd topic, possibly uncomfortable and disturbing. Oddly, those same people find nothing wrong with crowding others in public places and pressing against them. I personally find that talking about your penis and balls is less odious than having you sit with your knees so wide that they push me over. What do you think of this?"

It doesn't have to be either/or. Society must accommodate men with larger man-only seats on subways. The current one size fits all seats have a disparate impact on men who tend to be both larger overall and possess larger genitals between their legs.

 

[Nice Squirrel]

"Some people find this an odd topic, possibly uncomfortable and disturbing. Oddly, those same people find nothing wrong with crowding others in public places and pressing against them. I personally find that talking about your penis and balls is less odious than having you sit with your knees so wide that they push me over. What do you think of this?"

It doesn't have to be either/or. Society must accommodate men with larger man-only seats on subways. The current one size fits all seats have a disparate impact on men who tend to be both larger overall and possess larger genitals between their legs.

Spoken like a true Texan.

 

[Rhea]

Or, they could stand when they are uncomfortable sitting. Or wear briefs or athletic supporters.
My hips are most comfortable when I sit cross-legged. Partly because those seats are always too high off the ground for me, causing my feet to dangle and place extra weight on the backs of my thighs cutting off circulation. But I do not consider it my right to take up more space over this. Not sure why men do. Odd. Also, you solution means that there are fewer seats and more people will have to stand. Why not the guys who are less comfortable sitting? I often stand in subways because of exactly this, that the seats are not very comfortable to me.

 

[dismal]

It doesn't have to be either/or. Society must accommodate men with larger man-only seats on subways. The current one size fits all seats have a disparate impact on men who tend to be both larger overall and possess larger genitals between their legs.

Spoken like a true Texan.

Do men where you are have smaller genitals than women?

 

[Nice Squirrel]

Spoken like a true Texan.

Do men where you are have smaller genitals than women?

Focused on genitals now? I was thinking more of the wide Texas asses and the fact Texas has no subways. (You can prove me wrong.)

 

[dismal]

Do men where you are have smaller genitals than women?

Focused on genitals now? I was thinking more of the wide Texas asses and the fact Texas has no subways. (You can prove me wrong.)

Your nonsensical anti-Texan bigotry seems entirely irrelevant here.

This is America there are wide asses everywhere.

An in any case there is light rail in TX, and buses, and movie theaters many other places where one-size-fits-all seating wreaks its disproportionate havoc on men.

 

[Nice Squirrel]

Focused on genitals now? I was thinking more of the wide Texas asses and the fact Texas has no subways. (You can prove me wrong.)

Your nonsensical anti-Texan bigotry seems entirely irrelevant here.

This is America there are wide asses everywhere.

An in any case there is light rail in TX, and buses, and movie theaters many other places where one-size-fits-all seating wreaks its disproportionate havoc on men.

So, both genders have wide assess, Texas still has no subway, something something movie theatre?

 

[dismal]

Your nonsensical anti-Texan bigotry seems entirely irrelevant here.

This is America there are wide asses everywhere.

An in any case there is light rail in TX, and buses, and movie theaters many other places where one-size-fits-all seating wreaks its disproportionate havoc on men.

So, both genders have wide assess, Texas still has no subway, something something movie theatre?

To recap, my point has nothing to do with Texas and hence there is little relevance to your persistent bigoted anti-Texas hate speech.

If you would like to engage addressing actual points I have made:

1) Men tend to be bigger than women
2) Men tend to have bigger external genitals in their crotch regions than women
3) Because of 1 and 2 one size fits all seating has a disproportionate negative impact on men

I'm not sure why you think any of the above have anything to do with Texas because

a) they don't

 

[Nice Squirrel]

So, both genders have wide assess, Texas still has no subway, something something movie theatre?

To recap, my point has nothing to do with Texas and hence there is little relevance to your persistent bigoted anti-Texas hate speech.

Anti-Texas hate speech?

Because Texans have big butts and no subways?

Man, you ain't got nothing on Mississippi.

 

[dismal]

To recap, my point has nothing to do with Texas and hence there is little relevance to your persistent bigoted anti-Texas hate speech.

Anti-Texas hate speech?

Because Texans have big butts and no subways?

Man, you ain't got nothing on Mississippi.

At this point I think it's prudent to steer wide and leave you to babbling on about your Texas demons as if you were a crazy guy on a street corner.

 

[Rhea]

"Some people find this an odd topic, possibly uncomfortable and disturbing. Oddly, those same people find nothing wrong with crowding others in public places and pressing against them. I personally find that talking about your penis and balls is less odious than having you sit with your knees so wide that they push me over. What do you think of this?"

It doesn't have to be either/or. Society must accommodate men with larger man-only seats on subways. The current one size fits all seats have a disparate impact on men who tend to be both larger overall and possess larger genitals between their legs.

I don't actually give a shit about men's genitals in buses. dealing with them is their own problem. I don't think bus seats need to be re-designed to accommodate your nut sack. Shit, I thought you were joking. You're serious? You want to re-design bus seats to make space for your genitals?

I am LMAO here.

 

[Rhea]

That doesn't work for females, though. However, Dr. Zoidberg has offered up the perfect female plan.

I shall instead start talking very loudly about various products and strategies a man can use to avoid squeezing his nutsack between meaty thighs. I expect this could be quite fun. "I notice you are sitting with your knees so wide apart they intrude into the space of your neighbor. If you find it difficult to bring your knees close enough together to be polite, for example if the skin on your nutsack sags and gets pinched between your meaty thighs, "

remember I will say this nice and clearly, and loudly,

"I have heard that wearing briefs can help alleviate it. Some men also find that bringing their thighs together before sitting down brings the package up and forward, reducing the risk of sweaty or itchy compression. For severe cases, some men struggle between adjusting their penis and balls in public or just imposing on their neighbors, making instead the neighbor uncomfortable and compressed into small spaces. It would be useful for you to know that I would prefer you to reach down and grab your sack and adjust it in whatever way is necessary for you to be able to stay in your own space."

I'll pause here,

"Some people find this an odd topic, possibly uncomfortable and disturbing. Oddly, those same people find nothing wrong with crowding others in public places and pressing against them. I personally find that talking about your penis and balls is less odious than having you sit with your knees so wide that they push me over. What do you think of this?"

I shared this with my daughter and she wondered,

"Wouldn't you be worried that the man would just think you were offering to have sex with him? Men aren't really good at subtlety, mom."

 

[Nice Squirrel]

At this point I think it's prudent to steer wide and leave you to babbling on about your Texas demons as if you were a crazy guy on a street corner.

I don't believe in subways between Wal-Marts in Texas and I don't believe that Jade 15 is a conspiracy.

 

[Juma]

I don't actually give a shit about men's genitals. dealing with them is their own problem. I don't think bus seat need to be re designed to accommodate your nut sack. Shit, I thought you were joking. You're serious? You want to redesign bus seats to make space for your genitals?

I am LMAO here.

WTF?

 

[Nice Squirrel]

Seriously, don't your genitals have to be bigger than a prize hog at the Iowa State Fair to need a wide enough stance to take up two seats?

 

[Rhea]

I don't actually give a shit about men's genitals. dealing with them is their own problem. I don't think bus seat need to be re designed to accommodate your nut sack. Shit, I thought you were joking. You're serious? You want to redesign bus seats to make space for your genitals?

I am LMAO here.

WTF?

I edited in the post that generated this reply.

 

[dismal]

It doesn't have to be either/or. Society must accommodate men with larger man-only seats on subways. The current one size fits all seats have a disparate impact on men who tend to be both larger overall and possess larger genitals between their legs.

I don't actually give a shit about men's genitals in buses. dealing with them is their own problem. I don't think bus seats need to be re-designed to accommodate your nut sack. Shit, I thought you were joking. You're serious? You want to re-design bus seats to make space for your genitals?

I am LMAO here.

If you count "bigger" as redesign. But it's not so much what I want but what is required for men to be treated fairly.

 

[Nice Squirrel]

I don't actually give a shit about men's genitals in buses. dealing with them is their own problem. I don't think bus seats need to be re-designed to accommodate your nut sack. Shit, I thought you were joking. You're serious? You want to re-design bus seats to make space for your genitals?

I am LMAO here.

If you count "bigger" as redesign. But it's not so much what I want but what is required for men to be treated fairly.

Is the law written in gender specific language? I mean can women take a wide stance to air the ol'cooch out? Or are all wide stances outlawed?