Trump Fires Self From Presidency

[Jimmy Higgins]

WASHINGTON DC -- Despite recently praising his own performance not 12 hours ago on Twitter, the President of the United States, Donald Trump sent a letter to himself stating the "Nation needed a change in leadership that America could depend on." The letter indicated questionable performance in his presidency including "flip flopping" on important issues like NATO and NAFTA as well as "unhinged public displays of competence". The letter went into great details of how much golf the President was playing instead of "dealing with important matters of national security".

The often criticized President, continuously used Twitter to support his accomplishments and deride critics as being partisan and 'fake news'. However, Trump wrote to himself that in "all fairness" all that he accomplished in his first 100 or so days was signing a bunch of "toothless" Executive Orders that were "mere publicity stunts".

Donald Trump learned of his firing himself while watching Fox News in the very early hours this morning, having previously just tweeted "What a successful day for the Trump Admin yesterday!" Aides said Trump was disappointed with himself for being fired. Vice President Michael Pence will take over in a swearing in ceremony expected in a half hour.

 

[Rayschism]

Liberal piece of crap.

 

[PyramidHead]

Trump was not aware of his own firing until a full 2 days after it occurred, as it was reported by Fox News that he had merely taken a paid vacation. He only learned of his dismissal when he walked past a shady patch of shrubbery and Sean Spicer rose from the underbrush like the Great Pumpkin to deliver the information, after verifying that the moon was full.

 

[Keith&Co.]

Meanwhile, Trump is still running for President in 2020.
He really, really enjoys making empty promises in big rooms full of people shouting his name, who do not demand that he actually produce any concrete results or even admit to an IOU for results.

 

[blastula]

And the letter was on Kremlin letterhead.

 

[RavenSky]

Posts 1, 3, 4 and 5 all have me

Love you guys when you get on a roll like this

 

[ideologyhunter]

"I really missed my old life," the fired President mused. "I have a ton of stuff I didn't get to say to Billy Bush, and I haven't mimed a person with atrophic muscle disorder since last year. This way I can have rallies non-stop, starting in Lima, Ohio."