Describe How We Met

[ZiprHead]

I was the bouncer at a brothel and you were the house's biggest earner.

 

[Keith&Co.]

Ivwas trying to summon a succubus for sex, you banged on my door telling me the chanting was erotic

 

[Elixir]

I was in a seafood restaurant, and saw food.

 

[jonatha]

I was the last man on earth and you decided not to be too picky

 

[Jimmy Higgins]

I was the guy who stumbled out of the bar into your lap (you ended up being a park bench), best sex of my life.

 

[ZiprHead]

I lost my legs in a horrible industrial accident. You re-attached Ann Margret's legs to my body.

 

[Patooka]

My lawyer has instructed me to not answer that.

 

[Keith&Co.]

I was a TYPICAL TOURIST on Jan 6th, got back to my car at the commuter station, where someohe had defaced my TRUMP flags and flattened my tires. You were the AAA tow truck that came to my rescue and i've been hiding in your basement ever since.

 

[Keith&Co.]

You asked the room, "If we evolved from apes, why are there still apes?"
I stood up and asked, "Are you trying to sound smart or stupid?"
You said, "Trump is still the President!"
And I've been calling you my little idiot ever since.

 

[Jimmy Higgins]

I was the drunken man in a fit of rage, you were the officer with a taser.

I was gasping for breath, thrashing in freezing water, trying to get in the lifeboat, you were the person pushing me back in the water with your foot.

I was the last man on Earth and you were the one sizing up a well hung ape.

 

[Keith&Co.]

I remember trying to get the bagel out of the toaster.
Next thing i know, I hear you say, "He's gone, I'm calling it."
I sat up on the gurney and asked, "Who's gone?"
When you stopped screaming i asked for your name.

 

[Keith&Co.]

I was seeking a cure for satyriasis, you were looking for someplace 'novel' to hang your Christmas Wreath...

 

[ZiprHead]

I was seeking a cure for satyriasis, you were looking for someplace 'novel' to hang your Christmas Wreath...

If your erection lasts more than four hours add more wreaths.

 

[Keith&Co.]

I was seeking a cure for satyriasis, you were looking for someplace 'novel' to hang your Christmas Wreath...

If your erection lasts more than four hours add more wreaths.

Deck the balls with bows and holly, fa la la la la

 

[Keith&Co.]

You were mopping the hallway, with big DO NOT FUCKING ENTER signs at both ends. I had to get into the supplies closet for a pen.
I slipped, you caught me, it was love at first sight right after you remopped the floor.

 

[Jarhyn]

Man, I remember it like it was yesterday.

You were dressed in that fantastic cultist robe and I was on the altar all sultry and naked...

And then all that chaos and the screaming as the tentacles burst out of my eyesockets.

It was love at first •••.

 

[Gospel]

We met when I tried to square dance in a circle.