Honest talk about the cost of being ugly

[DrZoidberg]

Here's a good one from Mike Israetel. He's a pretty devisive guy. And he's a body builder. So obviously he's talking from being in the shallow end of humanity. But stuff like this matters, regardless of how deep you are.



Thoughts? I think he's right on the money

 

[Harry Bosch]

Here's a good one from Mike Israetel. He's a pretty devisive guy. And he's a body builder. So obviously he's talking from being in the shallow end of humanity. But stuff like this matters, regardless of how deep you are.



Thoughts? I think he's right on the money

LOL. Being a body builder is the "shallow end of humanity"?! That cracked me up. Sorry for derail. I will watch your video soon. At age 50 I was diagnosed as pre-diabetic, 50 pounds overweight, high blood pressure, no self esteem, and struggling at work. I turned to fitness. Now I'm 60: strongest that I've ever been (benched 325 last week at my age!); eating healthy. I take no drugs: but all my numbers are great: blood pressure great, and etc. I've never felt better. Anyway, I'll watch your vide and get back!!...

 

[southernhybrid]

Here's a good one from Mike Israetel. He's a pretty devisive guy. And he's a body builder. So obviously he's talking from being in the shallow end of humanity. But stuff like this matters, regardless of how deep you are.



Thoughts? I think he's right on the money

LOL. Being a body builder is the "shallow end of humanity"?! That cracked me up. Sorry for derail. I will watch your video soon. At age 50 I was diagnosed as pre-diabetic, 50 pounds overweight, high blood pressure, no self esteem, and struggling at work. I turned to fitness. Now I'm 60: strongest that I've ever been (benched 325 last week at my age!); eating healthy. I take no drugs: but all my numbers are great: blood pressure great, and etc. I've never felt better. Anyway, I'll watch your vide and get back!!...

That's great! I only watched about 2 minutes of the stupid video. It's about the "Brutal reality of being ugly" It's over 35 minutes long. Don't waste your time. I hate watching videos and Z could have least summed up what the video was about. Besides, "Beauty is in the eye of the beholder" a wise author said hundreds of years ago.

 

[DrZoidberg]

Here's a good one from Mike Israetel. He's a pretty devisive guy. And he's a body builder. So obviously he's talking from being in the shallow end of humanity. But stuff like this matters, regardless of how deep you are.



Thoughts? I think he's right on the money

LOL. Being a body builder is the "shallow end of humanity"?! That cracked me up. Sorry for derail. I will watch your video soon. At age 50 I was diagnosed as pre-diabetic, 50 pounds overweight, high blood pressure, no self esteem, and struggling at work. I turned to fitness. Now I'm 60: strongest that I've ever been (benched 325 last week at my age!); eating healthy. I take no drugs: but all my numbers are great: blood pressure great, and etc. I've never felt better. Anyway, I'll watch your vide and get back!!...

That's great! I only watched about 2 minutes of the stupid video. It's about the "Brutal reality of being ugly" It's over 35 minutes long. Don't waste your time. I hate watching videos and Z could have least summed up what the video was about. Besides, "Beauty is in the eye of the beholder" a wise author said hundreds of years ago.

But it isn't. It just isn't. Its such a mean thing to say.

If someone isn't attractive and is told that beauty is in the eye of the beholder, then not only are they physically unatrative, can't do anything about it and its their fault for having an unpleasant personality.

 

[southernhybrid]

Here's a good one from Mike Israetel. He's a pretty devisive guy. And he's a body builder. So obviously he's talking from being in the shallow end of humanity. But stuff like this matters, regardless of how deep you are.



Thoughts? I think he's right on the money

LOL. Being a body builder is the "shallow end of humanity"?! That cracked me up. Sorry for derail. I will watch your video soon. At age 50 I was diagnosed as pre-diabetic, 50 pounds overweight, high blood pressure, no self esteem, and struggling at work. I turned to fitness. Now I'm 60: strongest that I've ever been (benched 325 last week at my age!); eating healthy. I take no drugs: but all my numbers are great: blood pressure great, and etc. I've never felt better. Anyway, I'll watch your vide and get back!!...

That's great! I only watched about 2 minutes of the stupid video. It's about the "Brutal reality of being ugly" It's over 35 minutes long. Don't waste your time. I hate watching videos and Z could have least summed up what the video was about. Besides, "Beauty is in the eye of the beholder" a wise author said hundreds of years ago.

But it isn't. It just isn't. Its such a mean thing to say.

If someone isn't attractive and is told that beauty is in the eye of the beholder, then not only are they physically unatrative, can't do anything about it and its their fault for having an unpleasant personality.

I never tell anyone what they look like. I was simply noting that what one person thinks is ugly, another might find attractive or not be bothered by the physical appearance of that person. There are plenty of unattractive men who are married to attractive women because most women are not simply attracted to men due to their physical appearance. When we met, I was not physically attracted to my husband of 44 years due to his appearance. I was attracted to him due to his sense of humor, intelligence, generosity and affectionate nature. That is my point.

As time went on, I found his appearance to be more attractive, probably because I love him. Judging someone by their physical appearance is wrong imo. Beauty is subjective, but of course, I would never tell someone that as a way to comfort them if they thought of themselves as ugly.

I saw what most people would call a very ugly woman in a restaurant last week. She was also very obese. Her partner was a fairly decent looking man and he wasn't obese. They were an older couple and had probably been together for a long time, so maybe there is no brutality of being ugly as how we perceive the appearance of others varies and as the saying goes, "love is blind". People can be happy with their mate regardless of their physical appearance. Do you not understand that? Plus we don't all age well. I've been lucky, but I know plenty of people who haven't aged well. One friend who is very over weight started taking GLP drugs because her husband told her he loves her so much and he is worried that her obesity might lead to health problems that will leave him widowed and he doesn't want to live without her. That's love.

 

[Elixir]

If someone isn't attractive and is told that beauty is in the eye of the beholder, then not only are they physically unatrative, can't do anything about it and its their fault for having an unpleasant personality.

Wut?
I disagree. “Beauty is in the eye of the beholder” renders no judgment on a person’s attractiveness, it simply and correctly observes that the beholder’s impression is independent from others’ opinions.
The inference that “Beauty is in the eye of the beholder” means that Jabba the Hutt is therefore exactly as attractive as Princess Leia by any objective measure, is only drawn by people who are insecure about their own appearance.
That we all come up short of physical perfection, is a given. As we age, fewer and fewer “beholders” will deem us beautiful, and that is also a given.
Unpleasant personalities greatly reduce perceptions of beauty in beholder eyes.
I get impressions of physical ugliness from posters with unpleasant personalities. Is that them, or is it me? The answer should be obvious. Maybe they’re ugly maybe they’re not. But the notion that there’s no way they can possibly influence my impression, is false.

 

[Jarhyn]

If someone isn't attractive and is told that beauty is in the eye of the beholder, then not only are they physically unatrative, can't do anything about it and its their fault for having an unpleasant personality.

Wut?
I disagree. “Beauty is in the eye of the beholder” renders no judgment on a person’s attractiveness, it simply and correctly observes that the beholder’s impression is independent from others’ opinions.
The inference that “Beauty is in the eye of the beholder” means that Jabba the Hutt is therefore exactly as attractive as Princess Leia by any objective measure, is only drawn by people who are insecure about their own appearance.
That we all come up short of physical perfection, is a given. As we age, fewer and fewer “beholders” will deem us beautiful, and that is also a given.
Unpleasant personalities greatly reduce perceptions of beauty in beholder eyes.
I get impressions of physical ugliness from posters with unpleasant personalities. Is that them, or is it me? The answer should be obvious. Maybe they’re ugly maybe they’re not. But the notion that there’s no way they can possibly influence my impression, is false.

My experience with "ugly" men as someone who is at times "shallow":

Everyone I have ever seen call themselves ugly has been reasonably physically attractive. The guy in the video is "reasonably physically attractive".

Of those who call themselves ugly, maybe 20% of them smell bad and have poor grooming habits.

In addition, 90+% of them have bad personalities: poor impulse control, extremely shallow demands for "beauty", believe they should have true authority in a relationship, or have some other major issues.

Further, when my husband encounters the same "ugly" people, he will call them "ugly" insultingly to their face, but only AFTER these things become apparent.

The thing is, "ugly" from a large (majority?) of the population does not mean unattractive, it means you behave in an ugly way.

 

[pood]

First, I believe the rules state that when you post a video, you are supposed to give a summary of it. This was not done.

Still, I clicked on it. The very first words out of this goober’s mouth were. “Looks matter a ton.”

No, they do not.

Later we have, “the brutal reality of being ugly.” Fuck off, asshole.

Ended viewing the vid there.

What matters is not what you look like, but what you are like inside.

For example, if you look like Marilyn Monroe, but support genocide in Gaza, then you are ugly through and through.

Also, I did a little online surfing and discovered more about this guy. His body, physically, is extremely ugly. His face ain’t all that great, either.

I know nothing else about him, but I am betting he is a Trump supporter.

 

[pood]

A little research indicates that the blockhead with the self-deformed body voted for Trump in 2024. Yawn, what a shock.

No shock that someone like Dr. Zoid would talk up a dunce like this.

 

[Jarhyn]

First, I believe the rules state that when you post a video, you are supposed to give a summary of it. This was not done.

Still, I clicked on it. The very first words out of this goober’s mouth were. “Looks matter a ton.”

No, they do not.

Later we have, “the brutal reality of being ugly.” Fuck off, asshole.

Ended viewing the vid there.

What matters is not what you look like, but what you are like inside.

For example, if you look like Marilyn Monroe, but support genocide in Gaza, then you are ugly through and through.

Also, I did a little online surfing and discovered more about this guy. His body, physically, is extremely ugly. His face ain’t all that great, either.

I know nothing else about him, but I am betting he is a Trump supporter.

See, there is a kind of "ugly" for every look.

I can see someone as a Heady Lamar, or a MTG, depending on what comes out of their mouth.

I can see someone as a cute soft-faced twink, or as an inbred with a gross chin depending on whether they happen to be stalking me and occasionally sending me threatening messages (true story).

Ugly is about who someone is.

Ugly is a filter we apply to the people we see based on how (adaptive? Compatible with us?) we think they are.

While I know some significantly more shallow people might disagree, there was this one person I saw on the bus who had either been in a fire or an acid attack, and I wanted to know who they are because I had this notion that they might be the most beautiful person I might have ever seen, but I was too shy to pry and they seemed uncomfortable with eyes on them overlong.

 

[steve_bank]

Anyone who knows who Hedy Lamar was is ok in my book.

Listened to a report. I don't remember the term used for it.

Toxic obsession with looks and appearance fostered by net influencers affecting young people. Fanatical body building.

AI Overview
The Internet's obsession with appearance is driven by algorithm-rewarded perfection. Visual platforms and beauty filters set unrealistic standards. This creates constant image-based comparison, low self-esteem, and social anxiety. It can even lead to photo-editing addiction and body dysmorphia.

AI Overview
Internet-driven teen bodybuilding is a growing trend where social media algorithms promote extreme, unnatural physiques to young people. Driven by "fitspiration" videos, many teens develop an unhealthy obsession with getting massive and shredded. This often leads to severe mental and physical health risks.

The beauty industry has always used unrealistic images of beauty to sell products.

Personalty I neverliked women who used makeup. I never though Marylin Monroe was attractive. Just gaudy.

 

[Loren Pechtel]

My experience with "ugly" men as someone who is at times "shallow":

Everyone I have ever seen call themselves ugly has been reasonably physically attractive. The guy in the video is "reasonably physically attractive".

Of those who call themselves ugly, maybe 20% of them smell bad and have poor grooming habits.

In addition, 90+% of them have bad personalities: poor impulse control, extremely shallow demands for "beauty", believe they should have true authority in a relationship, or have some other major issues.

Further, when my husband encounters the same "ugly" people, he will call them "ugly" insultingly to their face, but only AFTER these things become apparent.

The thing is, "ugly" from a large (majority?) of the population does not mean unattractive, it means you behave in an ugly way.

People want to pretend looks don't matter.

Establishing that they are not an absolute barrier doesn't establish that they don't matter.

And the reality is that people unconsciously equate looks with trustworthiness.

Looks do not give success, they give far more chances to try for success.

 

[Jarhyn]

My experience with "ugly" men as someone who is at times "shallow":

Everyone I have ever seen call themselves ugly has been reasonably physically attractive. The guy in the video is "reasonably physically attractive".

Of those who call themselves ugly, maybe 20% of them smell bad and have poor grooming habits.

In addition, 90+% of them have bad personalities: poor impulse control, extremely shallow demands for "beauty", believe they should have true authority in a relationship, or have some other major issues.

Further, when my husband encounters the same "ugly" people, he will call them "ugly" insultingly to their face, but only AFTER these things become apparent.

The thing is, "ugly" from a large (majority?) of the population does not mean unattractive, it means you behave in an ugly way.

People want to pretend looks don't matter.

Establishing that they are not an absolute barrier doesn't establish that they don't matter.

And the reality is that people unconsciously equate looks with trustworthiness.

Looks do not give success, they give far more chances to try for success.

My experience is that particular looks do equate in some regards to trustworthiness.

The looks I use to separate upon with trustworthiness are, however, probably quite different from most people's: do they have a shifty posture; how are they looking at the world; what is the expression on their face and does it reach their eyes?

The people I find who give more chances for "success" on such a basis as "basic conventional attractiveness" are exactly the people I don't want to have parasitize my success anyway.

I'll share success with less ugly people.

 

[Elixir]

My experience is that particular looks do equate in some regards to trustworthiness.

Bilaterally symmetrical facial features are highly valued …

 

[steve_bank]

My experience is that particular looks do equate in some regards to trustworthiness.

Bilaterally symmetrical facial features are highly valued …

A lot of guys value big symmetrical boobs. They are 'beautiful'. Works of art.

 

[Bronzeage]

If someone isn't attractive and is told that beauty is in the eye of the beholder, then not only are they physically unatrative, can't do anything about it and its their fault for having an unpleasant personality.

Wut?
I disagree. “Beauty is in the eye of the beholder” renders no judgment on a person’s attractiveness, it simply and correctly observes that the beholder’s impression is independent from others’ opinions.
The inference that “Beauty is in the eye of the beholder” means that Jabba the Hutt is therefore exactly as attractive as Princess Leia by any objective measure, is only drawn by people who are insecure about their own appearance.
That we all come up short of physical perfection, is a given. As we age, fewer and fewer “beholders” will deem us beautiful, and that is also a given.
Unpleasant personalities greatly reduce perceptions of beauty in beholder eyes.
I get impressions of physical ugliness from posters with unpleasant personalities. Is that them, or is it me? The answer should be obvious. Maybe they’re ugly maybe they’re not. But the notion that there’s no way they can possibly influence my impression, is false.

Whether Jabba the Hutt is more attractive than Princess Leia depends on whether the beholder is Han Solo or Maryanne the Hutt.

I do have good news about getting older, at least for men. As we get older, the number of men who really want a relationship with a woman begins to decline and the number of single women increases. For those men who think it's worth the effort, their objective attractiveness(adjusting for age) is actually of little importance. What does matter is the same things that mattered 50 years in the past, which are clean shirt, clean nails, smell good, and smile.

 

[Elixir]

Whether Jabba the Hutt is more attractive than Princess Leia depends on whether the beholder is Han Solo or Maryanne the Hutt.

Hmmm … I think Han Solo would prefer Ginger the Hutt.

As we get older, the number of men who really want a relationship with a woman begins to decline and the number of single women increases. For those men who think it's worth the effort, their objective attractiveness(adjusting for age) is actually of little importance.

I must be really old. An ex-employee (female) messaged me that she and my old partner’s ex wife were going to be at a bar/restaurant at 2:00 yesterday afternoon. I figured they might invite one or two mutual friends, ex-employees etc.
I got there a few minutes after two and crammed myself in between FOURTEEN women, three of whom I have known for years and the rest were utter strangers. It was like I was a curiosity, taking questions and being given names I couldn’t retain.
Had a lemonade while the “ladies” downed more pitchers of margaritas …
I have always enjoyed the company of women, but this was bordering on crowd claustrophobia.
Reminisced a bit, then made my apologies, citing the actual fact that Mrs E cannot be safely left unattended for prolonged periods… by 2:45 when I left, the women were pretty lit, and I was pretty sure that if I did or said anything wrong, none of them would remember.

 

[steve_bank]

Nature vs nurture, Saw this on a nature show,

AI Overview
Yes, female peacocks (called peahens) choose their mates based on the male's vibrant colors, specifically the size, quantity, and iridescence of the "eyespots" on their giant tail feathers (known as the train).

The mating selection process relies heavily on specific visual and physical traits:Eyespot
Color and Iridescence: Research indicates that the brightness and intense blue-green iridescence of a peacock's eyespots are among the most critical factors for mating success.
Train Quality: Peahens evaluate the overall density, symmetry, and length of the tail feathers to gauge the male's genetic health and vigor.
The "Sexy Son" Hypothesis: By choosing the most colorful and robust males, females ensure their male offspring inherit these same attractive traits, giving future generations a reproductive advantage.

From the show plumage correlates to immune system health.

AI Overview
Yes, male peacock colors and elaborate feather trains are directly related to their immune system. In evolutionary biology, this is known as the "Hamilton-Zuk hypothesis" and the "Handicap Principle," where females look for specific "honest signals" of genetic quality.

 

[Bronzeage]

Whether Jabba the Hutt is more attractive than Princess Leia depends on whether the beholder is Han Solo or Maryanne the Hutt.

Hmmm … I think Han Solo would prefer Ginger the Hutt.

As we get older, the number of men who really want a relationship with a woman begins to decline and the number of single women increases. For those men who think it's worth the effort, their objective attractiveness(adjusting for age) is actually of little importance.

I must be really old. An ex-employee (female) messaged me that she and my old partner’s ex wife were going to be at a bar/restaurant at 2:00 yesterday afternoon. I figured they might invite one or two mutual friends, ex-employees etc.
I got there a few minutes after two and crammed myself in between FOURTEEN women, three of whom I have known for years and the rest were utter strangers. It was like I was a curiosity, taking questions and being given names I couldn’t retain.
Had a lemonade while the “ladies” downed more pitchers of margaritas …
I have always enjoyed the company of women, but this was bordering on crowd claustrophobia.
Reminisced a bit, then made my apologies, citing the actual fact that Mrs E cannot be safely left unattended for prolonged periods… by 2:45 when I left, the women were pretty lit, and I was pretty sure that if I did or said anything wrong, none of them would remember.

Not an ideal situation, but the key here is Mrs. E. You are not on the market. When my father found himself a widower at age 60, there was a surprising number of women who apparently had been biding their time. It seems having a reputation as a "good husband" is top of the list of qualities they valued.

 

[Jarhyn]

Whether Jabba the Hutt is more attractive than Princess Leia depends on whether the beholder is Han Solo or Maryanne the Hutt.

Jabba is one ugly bastard.

He enjoys eating living things specifically because they suffer.

He is a drug dealer and murdering gang boss.

He puts living humans locked in suffering on display for personal amusement.

He is a slaver.

He is a rapist.

Blotus the Hutt on the other hand...

Apparently some Hutts can be sexy AF.