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Sick Fuck Tells Office He Brought In Doughnuts When It Was Only Krispy Kreme

 
 
 
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Jimmy Higgins

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OFFICE, AT WORK -- A perverted and obviously troubled worker announced to co-workers he had brought in doughnuts to the office. The initial delirium that typically comes to an office when free goodies are available quickly turned to disdain when the co-workers discovered they were Krispy Kremes. It is uncertain whether the worker was mentally ill, incompetent and unable to tell the difference between Krispy Kreme and actual doughnuts, or whether they were just a sadistic asshole that enjoyed ruining people's days.

At the time of the reporting, half of the "doughnuts" were eaten, at least in part, as office workers will eat just about anything, up to kale, if it is free.
 
Jimmy Higgins said:
OFFICE, AT WORK -- A perverted and obviously troubled worker announced to co-workers he had brought in doughnuts to the office. The initial delirium that typically comes to an office when free goodies are available quickly turned to disdain when the co-workers discovered they were Krispy Kremes. It is uncertain whether the worker was mentally ill, incompetent and unable to tell the difference between Krispy Kreme and actual doughnuts, or whether they were just a sadistic asshole that enjoyed ruining people's days.

At the time of the reporting, half of the "doughnuts" were eaten, at least in part, as office workers will eat just about anything, up to kale, if it is free.
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^ utter sacrilegious ignorant nonsense.
Kristy Kreme in its original divine formulation, is the archetypal perfect donut.
The original store in NC was so good, I used to VOLUNTEER to run the regional trade show in Winston-Salem just for the chance to eat Kristy Kreme three days in a row. I HATE being a trade show exhibitor, I despise air travel, and the hotel where all the good old boys stay is about 400 years old, but Krispy Kreme made it all worth it.
 
Whatever you say, pervert! :D

I remember being a little kid and at the church we went to, some Sundays they made donuts. Best Sundays ever! Few things are better than a fresh doughnut that is still warm. I think that is what Krispy Kreme originally did. If the doughnuts were rightly fresh, people would storm the store and pillage the counter. When their "dough"nuts are brought to the office, they aren't warm, they aren't that good. Dunkin Donuts used to be the thing (I'm from the South Shore after all), however, that was before their doughtnuts shrunk to the size of munchkins and the munchkins looked like dipping dots. Around in my parts, well from the South Shore, we have a few local donut shops where the doughnuts are quality... and not the shit Krispy Kreme cons the mentally ill into buying. ;)
 
It’s not the doughnut’s fault that it was under-cooked, stored poorly and given to you stale!
At the NC shop, you’d watch YOUR donuts come out of the fryer, onto the conveyor belt, through the glazing spray and hot into the bag. They were huge, but you could cram a half of one into your mouth and it would virtually disappear without swallowing. Divine!
 
A little party store by where a couple friends of ours had a cabin north of Oscoda made fresh donuts every weekend morning. It was heaven. And a great hangover cure.

That store was featured on one of those state tourist promotion television series on PBS. https://utrmichigan.com/
 
bilby said:
There are two kinds of doughnut:

1) Still too hot to touch, much less eat; and
2) Stale.
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Correct. And since we have no Krispy Kreme, that's exactly why I have been cultivating a taste for one of the below with coffee in the morning. I leave the box open so by day 8 they're good and stale, and handle like sweet biscuits. Mmm. Cheaper too. 1761091503258.png
 
Krispy Kreme didn't make it to my area until about 25 years ago. When it finally opened, the line was around the block and people waited an hour+ to get one. I remember thinking, "WTF is wrong with these people?". I figured it was some sort of cult following or "Madness of Crowds" thing. When I finally did taste one a couple of years after that, I remember thinking, "Yeah, that's pretty damn good. Still not gonna wait in line for more than 5 minutes for it, though". In-N-Out Burger seems to be the same phenomena as well.

The only time I ever get a donut/pastry these days is when I travel on I-5 through the Central Valley where I get an apple fritter at a truck stop/gas station in Lathrop where I stop for gas. Damn, those are yummy! And no waiting!

P.S. Avoid gas station mini-mart sushi. Ask me how I know. :sick:
 
bilby said:
There are two kinds of doughnut:

1) Still too hot to touch, much less eat; and
2) Stale.
Click to expand...
That simply isn't true. We have great doughnut shops out here that the "stale" version is quite awesome. We lost Donut Connection but Jubilee is remarkable.

Also, a Boston Creme would sound quite hazardous to eat if it was that hot.
 
Any so-called inferior donut can be saved if you pretend it is Baba au Rhum and pour a splash of rum on it. However, the office may not be viewed by management as the appropriate place to repair the shoddy donut.
 
I gave up eating donuts about 25 years ago because they are worthless fat and sugar cakes with no nutritional value and I was slightly overweight at the time and that probably helped me lose more weight than I expected along with exercising of course.

But, I do think that Crispy Creme donuts are better than Dunkin' Donuts, but on those rare occasions when I go to Dunkin', I have a bagel with creme cheese or an English muffin egg sandwich.

Publix has donuts in their bakery section but I resist.

Btw, stale cake or donuts taste very fresh if you put them in the microwave for about 8 to 10 seconds.

It's good to see us discussing such an important topic. :)
 
southernhybrid said:
I gave up eating donuts about 25 years ago because they are worthless fat and sugar cakes with no nutritional value and I was slightly overweight at the time and that probably helped me lose more weight than I expected along with exercising of course.

But, I do think that Crispy Creme donuts are better than Dunkin' Donuts, but on those rare occasions when I go to Dunkin', I have a bagel with creme cheese or an English muffin egg sandwich.

Publix has donuts in their bakery section but I resist.

Btw, stale cake or donuts taste very fresh if you put them in the microwave for about 8 to 10 seconds.

It's good to see us discussing such an important topic. :)
Click to expand...
I like Dunkin but do not have any favorite on the donut wars. My favorites are the ones with powdered sugar on the outside and chocolate or vanilla sugar creme on the inside.

As for the importance of this topic, nations have fought nations over less important topics.

en.wikipedia.org

Football War - Wikipedia

en.wikipedia.org en.wikipedia.org

Pele stopped a war in Nigeria for 48 hours. Imagine being so good at football that you stopped a whole war. This might be the most incredible moment in football history when Pele's team, Santos, came to play an exhibition match in Lagos.Aug 17, 2025
 
In 1731, Spanish sailors boarded the British brig Rebecca off the coast of Cuba and sliced off the left ear of its captain, Robert Jenkins. This traumatic auriculectomy was used as a pretext by the British to declare war on Spain in 1739, a conflict that is now known as the War of Jenkins' Ear.

No donuts were an issue here
 
lostone said:
southernhybrid said:
I gave up eating donuts about 25 years ago because they are worthless fat and sugar cakes with no nutritional value and I was slightly overweight at the time and that probably helped me lose more weight than I expected along with exercising of course.

But, I do think that Crispy Creme donuts are better than Dunkin' Donuts, but on those rare occasions when I go to Dunkin', I have a bagel with creme cheese or an English muffin egg sandwich.

Publix has donuts in their bakery section but I resist.

Btw, stale cake or donuts taste very fresh if you put them in the microwave for about 8 to 10 seconds.

It's good to see us discussing such an important topic. :)
Click to expand...
I like Dunkin but do not have any favorite on the donut wars. My favorites are the ones with powdered sugar on the outside and chocolate or vanilla sugar creme on the inside.

As for the importance of this topic, nations have fought nations over less important topics.

en.wikipedia.org

Football War - Wikipedia

en.wikipedia.org en.wikipedia.org

Pele stopped a war in Nigeria for 48 hours. Imagine being so good at football that you stopped a whole war. This might be the most incredible moment in football history when Pele's team, Santos, came to play an exhibition match in Lagos.Aug 17, 2025
Click to expand...
DIdier Drogba did better in the Ivory Coast.
 
The shortest war in history was the Anglo-Zanzibar War, which lasted 38 minutes (though some records suggest it might actually have dragged on for closer to 45 minutes).

After the war, the British punished the Zanzibar leaders by forcing them to pay for the ammunition that was fired at them during the war. There is no record of who, if anyone, paid for post-war doughnuts.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anglo-Zanzibar_War
 
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