Ask a stupid question and get a stupid answer

[Elixir]

Why does my life not feel fulfilled?

Because you do not own a cock ring made from a sheep's eye socket.

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However, lucky for you, they come in packs of five: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01BTN321K/ref=?tag=natdee-20






Did you see that one coming?

No, and neither did the sheep.
If you keep an eye out for opportunity, when do you put it back in?

 

[Keith&Co.]

If you keep an eye out for opportunity, when do you put it back in?

You never put it back! You don't know where that's been!


Is there an email version of knock - knock jokes?

 

[athee]

no, per Galactic decree 2017.3.25.12:36, only instant messaging is allowed.

Why do we park on driveways and drive on parkways?

 

[DolphinDynasty]

no, per Galactic decree 2017.3.25.12:36, only instant messaging is allowed.

Why do we park on driveways and drive on parkways?

Because parking on the parkway is liable to get your car towed at your expense. Plus, uncomfortable questions that need not be asked by law enforcement, if not a full invasive pat down, x-ray, blood test, etc.

If the sheep cock rings are made of bone, does that mean somebody who bones anybody else while wearing one is, in fact, double boning that person?

 

[athee]

no, per Galactic decree 2017.3.25.12:36, only instant messaging is allowed.

Why do we park on driveways and drive on parkways?

Because parking on the parkway is liable to get your car towed at your expense. Plus, uncomfortable questions that need not be asked by law enforcement, if not a full invasive pat down, x-ray, blood test, etc.

If the sheep cock rings are made of bone, does that mean somebody who bones anybody else while wearing one is, in fact, double boning that person?

Actually it is a slight fraction less than a full bone. If one considers a full bone to be cock-ring-less, once the ring is in place, then perhaps only 97% of full penetration is achieved, as the ring acts as a spacer.

Why does hearing a fart make you chuckle?

 

[snoiduspoitus]

Because parking on the parkway is liable to get your car towed at your expense. Plus, uncomfortable questions that need not be asked by law enforcement, if not a full invasive pat down, x-ray, blood test, etc.

If the sheep cock rings are made of bone, does that mean somebody who bones anybody else while wearing one is, in fact, double boning that person?

Actually it is a slight fraction less than a full bone. If one considers a full bone to be cock-ring-less, once the ring is in place, then perhaps only 97% of full penetration is achieved, as the ring acts as a spacer.

Why does hearing a fart make you chuckle?

Because farts are funny. Farts will always be funny.

I have suffered from 'wombat nose' for years. Do you recommend the ointment or the spray?

 

[Keith&Co.]

I have suffered from 'wombat nose' for years. Do you recommend the ointment or the spray?

Neither. Hairy Nosed Wombats are endangered, so the problem will soon solve itself.


Why are there more planes in the ocean than submarines in the sky?

 

[athee]

Actually it is a slight fraction less than a full bone. If one considers a full bone to be cock-ring-less, once the ring is in place, then perhaps only 97% of full penetration is achieved, as the ring acts as a spacer.

Why does hearing a fart make you chuckle?

Because farts are funny. Farts will always be funny.

I have suffered from 'wombat nose' for years. Do you recommend the ointment or the spray?

Neither.... the suppository is the recommended treatment.

I wear my wedding ring on my right hand. Why do people say that the ring has to be on the left hand?

 

[Keith&Co.]

I wear my wedding ring on my right hand. Why do people say that the ring has to be on the left hand?

Because it's more sinister that way.


What's the worst thing you've ever done to a boss?

 

[snoiduspoitus]

I wear my wedding ring on my right hand. Why do people say that the ring has to be on the left hand?

Because it's more sinister that way.


What's the worst thing you've ever done to a boss?

I don't know that I've ever done anything to hose a former boss.

My last job involved me sending letters to the boss and having him sign them.

How can I stop the neighbor's monkey from tearing the face off of Beatrice?

 

[Keith&Co.]

How can I stop the neighbor's monkey from tearing the face off of Beatrice?

Napalm would be my first guess. I assume Beatrice is fireproof, of course.

What IS the song of your people?

 

[athee]

How can I stop the neighbor's monkey from tearing the face off of Beatrice?

Napalm would be my first guess. I assume Beatrice is fireproof, of course.

What IS the song of your people?

NO! I already told you, 'What' is the album and 'Who' is the first track.

Why do you do it in the most complicated way?

 

[Keith&Co.]

Why do you do it in the most complicated way?

I do not, but the fact that it appears to you that this is what i am attempting is merely an artifact of two facts, one being my having the superior vocabulary in all discussions and the other, of course, being that you have an affinity for shortcuts brought on by your complete lack of an attention span.


What is a 'sanctuary city?'

 

[DolphinDynasty]

Why do you do it in the most complicated way?

I do not, but the fact that it appears to you that this is what i am attempting is merely an artifact of two facts, one being my having the superior vocabulary in all discussions and the other, of course, being that you have an affinity for shortcuts brought on by your complete lack of an attention span.


What is a 'sanctuary city?'

A 'sanctuary city' is where sea gulls fly to avoid people wearing half-hat visors and sandals with socks. Seeing this traumatizes them and they need a 'safe place' until healed.

If I can't think of a stupid question, does that mean I asked a smart one?

 

[snoiduspoitus]

I do not, but the fact that it appears to you that this is what i am attempting is merely an artifact of two facts, one being my having the superior vocabulary in all discussions and the other, of course, being that you have an affinity for shortcuts brought on by your complete lack of an attention span.


What is a 'sanctuary city?'

A 'sanctuary city' is where sea gulls fly to avoid people wearing half-hat visors and sandals with socks. Seeing this traumatizes them and they need a 'safe place' until healed.

If I can't think of a stupid question, does that mean I asked a smart one?

No.

Am I less of a man after the salt-water crock tore my arms. legs and penis off?

 

[DolphinDynasty]

A 'sanctuary city' is where sea gulls fly to avoid people wearing half-hat visors and sandals with socks. Seeing this traumatizes them and they need a 'safe place' until healed.

If I can't think of a stupid question, does that mean I asked a smart one?

No.

Am I less of a man after the salt-water crock tore my arms. legs and penis off?

Certainly less of a person, your arms, legs, and cock are gone, man!

If it's too late for bed, but too early for morning-time, does that mean I get to pick which part of the day it is at random?

 

[athee]

If it's too late for bed, but too early for morning-time, does that mean I get to pick which part of the day it is at random?

Sure as long as it is 4:15AM


Why is North always "up" ?

 

[Elixir]

If it's too late for bed, but too early for morning-time, does that mean I get to pick which part of the day it is at random?

Sure as long as it is 4:15AM


Why is North always "up" ?

Because West is always left.

Is an empty hole still a whole hole?

 

[Keith&Co.]

Is an empty hole still a whole hole?

All holes are whole holes, unless they're Hostess Hole-Holes.


If Holly celebrates Holi, is she then holy?

 

[jonatha]

If Holly celebrates Holi, is she then holy?

Considering the images that conjures, I'd have to say no....

Why doesn't the nonUSA part of the world like peanut butter?