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How would you subtitle the Bible?

T

T.G.G. Moogly

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If you were just looking at books on the shelf, titles, covers, and saw it sitting there, what should it be subtitled? I was thinking something like, "A dogmatic anthology of early christian writings." Or maybe, "An approved list of orthodox christian writings as of the 4th century."

It can be called lots of things, "Stories of genocide and salvation" would fit. But I was thinking of something more informative.
 
joedad said:
If you were just looking at books on the shelf, titles, covers, and saw it sitting there, what should it be subtitled? I was thinking something like, "A dogmatic anthology of early christian writings." Or maybe, "An approved list of orthodox christian writings as of the 4th century."

It can be called lots of things, "Stories of genocide and salvation" would fit. But I was thinking of something more informative.
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Noble poetry, some clever fables, some blood-drenched history, some good morals, a wealth of obscenity, and upwards of a thousand lies.

- Mark Twain
 
This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places and incidents either are products of the authors' imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual events or locales or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental.

Eldarion Lathria
 
A collection of writings from ancient and authentic to recently forged, edited by a committee of Christian bishops to serve their 4th century agenda.... whatever that was.
 
One of many attempts to communicate certain concepts to beings that are suspicious of others because of their own desire for wealth and power, and a certain zero sum way of looking at life.

Included in this book are the concepts:
not everyone can be richer than everyone else.
wealth and beauty can cause covetousness
power given can become power abused
Question what you are told- some people lie, cheat and steal to gain advantage over others
there are false prophets that come to you in the name of God
and many other concepts.
 
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Now I want 4d glasses. Now that would be interesting.
 
Here's a couple:

The Bible: Hot on the heels of the Tanakh comes the mind-bending sequel! Now with 200% more Jesus!

The Bible: God's back, bitches.

The Bible: The definitive story about how an alien biologist and his army of hideous 1000 eyed freaks known as 'angels' managed to convince a bunch of primitive desert folk into thinking snakes can talk.

The Bible: The definitive final version of the true account of creation and everything that followed it; except for all the religions that came afterwards claiming their books are the definitive final versions and how none of it lines up with actual science or reality.

The Bible: Believe it or die.

The Bible: Just when you thought Hollywood was running out of ways to run the zombie trope into the ground.

The Bible: Fan-edited director's cut.
 
....any resemblance to real history, either events or cities, is purely coincidental....
 
All of your questions answered with most vague and ambiguous text ever.
 
More of a review than a subtitle: An interesting collection of fairy tales by writer or writers unknown. It has everything exciting: gang rapes, genocides, sorcery, incest. We'll be eagerly waiting for the sequel.
 
dystopian said:
The Bible: Believe it or die.
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I really like this one. Just add the word Holy to title to read, The Holy Bible and right under put your slogan, Believe it or die

Keith&Co. said:
....any resemblance to real history, either events or cities, is purely coincidental....
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That’s the legal disclaimer I would think more than appropriate and would be refreshing to see when you open it up on and read on some fly page.
 
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