Single Man Matt Gaetz Suddenly Reveals He has a Cuban Son

[Don2 (Don1 Revised)]

The beard distracts everyone from the fact that his father assassinated JFK.

 

[Playball40]

"legally" from Cuba meant he stepped foot on US soil and was granted immediate asylum. Sheesh.

Twitter explodes after Matt Gaetz reveals he has a secret Cuban son to get back at a black Democrat

President Trump’s most vocal Congressional lapdog raised eyebrows around social media this afternoon when he mysteriously announced that he has a 19-year-old Cuban man living with him who he treats as his “son.”

Rep. Matt Gaetz (R-FL), who is unmarried, posted a bizarrely cropped photograph of himself with a man apparently named Nestor Galban to his Twitter account, claiming that this was his “son” and that therefore he does know what it is to raise a “non-white kid.”

[TWEET]<blockquote class="twitter-tweet"><p lang="en" dir="ltr">For all those wondering, this is my son Nestor. We share no blood but he is my life. He came from Cuba (legally, of course) six years ago and lives with me in Florida.<br><br>I am so proud of him and raising him has been the best, most rewarding thing I’ve done in my life. <a href="https://t.co/JB96wzOzYU">pic.twitter.com/JB96wzOzYU</a></p>— Matt Gaetz (@mattgaetz) <a href="https://twitter.com/mattgaetz/status/1273644503656730631?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">June 18, 2020</a></blockquote> <script async src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js" charset="utf-8"></script>[/TWEET]

The reaction didn't quite go as planned.

 

[Jimmy Higgins]

My favorite thing about the Father-Son relationship between Matt and Nestor is that there are virtually no images of them together. Their bond is so tight, they don't need to take photos. Nestor, our bond is so important that we musn't take photographs in case this leaks out.

As a legally adoptive parent... I mean as a legal foster parent, I mean as a legal guardian, I mean as a whatever the fuck this is, but almost certainly not binding with any sort of documentation... is a beautiful thing to behold. When he came out about this, we knew just how much he cared about his secret son (adopted son, foster child, ward?), to use him as a pawn in a political debate to pwn a Democrat who said Matt Gaetz didn't know what it was like to be a parent of a black child.

I mean to blow the secrecy of said child, which clearly was very important to him, in a botched attempt to one up a Democrat, that must mean something.... somewhere... in a galaxy far far away.

 

[Keith&Co.]

Please, please! This is supposed to be a happy occasion! I'd like to think, not that I've lost a debate, but gained a son! For, since the tragic death of his mom, he has lived near or around me. And i hope, by this time, he's come to look on me as his own, true dad, in an undocumented, but very real, and politically binding sense.

 

[Rhea]

My favorite thing about the Father-Son relationship between Matt and Nestor is that there are virtually no images of them together. Their bond is so tight, they don't need to take photos. Nestor, our bond is so important that we musn't take photographs in case this leaks out.

As a legally adoptive parent... I mean as a legal foster parent, I mean as a legal guardian, I mean as a whatever the fuck this is, but almost certainly not binding with any sort of documentation... is a beautiful thing to behold. When he came out about this, we knew just how much he cared about his secret son (adopted son, foster child, ward?), to use him as a pawn in a political debate to pwn a Democrat who said Matt Gaetz didn't know what it was like to be a parent of a black child.

I mean to blow the secrecy of said child, which clearly was very important to him, in a botched attempt to one up a Democrat, that must mean something.... somewhere... in a galaxy far far away.

These are good questions. This thing is deeply weird.

 

[Loren Pechtel]

My favorite thing about the Father-Son relationship between Matt and Nestor is that there are virtually no images of them together. Their bond is so tight, they don't need to take photos. Nestor, our bond is so important that we musn't take photographs in case this leaks out.

Actually, there is an innocent possibility: Very few pictures of my wife and I together exist because almost always I'm the one behind the camera.

 

[Don2 (Don1 Revised)]

My favorite thing about the Father-Son relationship between Matt and Nestor is that there are virtually no images of them together. Their bond is so tight, they don't need to take photos. Nestor, our bond is so important that we musn't take photographs in case this leaks out.

Actually, there is an innocent possibility: Very few pictures of my wife and I together exist because almost always I'm the one behind the camera.

Bullshit.

His "kid" is his girlfriend's brother.

In fact, you can see her in the reflection of the sunglasses taking the picture.

So there have been many instances over the last 7 years when she could have taken pictures.

Another example photograph...Gaetz is dressed up as Santa Claus and 12 year old Nestor is sitting with him. Why didn't you realize girlfriend took that creepy pic?

 

[barbos]

My favorite thing about the Father-Son relationship between Matt and Nestor is that there are virtually no images of them together. Their bond is so tight, they don't need to take photos. Nestor, our bond is so important that we musn't take photographs in case this leaks out.

Actually, there is an innocent possibility: Very few pictures of my wife and I together exist because almost always I'm the one behind the camera.

Bullshit.

His "kid" is his girlfriend's brother.

In fact, you can see her in the reflection of the sunglasses taking the picture.

The woman in the reflection is just passing by while "son" is taking a selfie

 

[bilby]

Admittedly, it makes him look less like a weasel.

No. It doesn’t really.

Indeed. Which is a shame, because looking like a weasel is a distinct improvement over looking like Ted Cruz.

 

[Don2 (Don1 Revised)]

Bullshit.

His "kid" is his girlfriend's brother.

In fact, you can see her in the reflection of the sunglasses taking the picture.

The woman in the reflection is just passing by while "son" is taking a selfie

Then who took this creepy pic?

 

[Loren Pechtel]

My favorite thing about the Father-Son relationship between Matt and Nestor is that there are virtually no images of them together. Their bond is so tight, they don't need to take photos. Nestor, our bond is so important that we musn't take photographs in case this leaks out.

Actually, there is an innocent possibility: Very few pictures of my wife and I together exist because almost always I'm the one behind the camera.

Bullshit.

His "kid" is his girlfriend's brother.

In fact, you can see her in the reflection of the sunglasses taking the picture.

So there have been many instances over the last 7 years when she could have taken pictures.

Another example photograph...Gaetz is dressed up as Santa Claus and 12 year old Nestor is sitting with him. Why didn't you realize girlfriend took that creepy pic?

I said it could be innocent--thus it's not proof of anything wrong. I don't think it is, though.

 

[Jimmy Higgins]

The guy didn't adopt Nestor. He isn't Nestor's foster parent. Matt Gaetz allegedly took him into his home after the woman who he was dating had her mother die. And then Nestor moves (there is nothing about the remainder of his family in Cuba). Very curious. Pondering whether sister used Gaetz to get brother over? Who knows.

But we get to the next part... Gaetz is serving in the Florida House when he does this. There is absolutely no reason to hide this because of politics... other that fear of GOP voters in a primary. Dems ain't going to give a damn if he has an "adopted" son.

And again, the fact that he hid this from many different angles, implies some shady stuff when it came to taking him in.

Bullshit.

His "kid" is his girlfriend's brother.

In fact, you can see her in the reflection of the sunglasses taking the picture.

So there have been many instances over the last 7 years when she could have taken pictures.

Another example photograph...Gaetz is dressed up as Santa Claus and 12 year old Nestor is sitting with him. Why didn't you realize girlfriend took that creepy pic?

I said it could be innocent--thus it's not proof of anything wrong. I don't think it is, though.

 

[barbos]

Bullshit.

His "kid" is his girlfriend's brother.

In fact, you can see her in the reflection of the sunglasses taking the picture.

The woman in the reflection is just passing by while "son" is taking a selfie

Then who took this creepy pic?

Could be selfie too, why does it matter?

 

[Don2 (Don1 Revised)]

Then who took this creepy pic?

Could be selfie too, why does it matter?

If so, they are perfectly capable of taking selfies. Not having Gaetz's gf (third wheel) present is no excuse for not having photos. My wife does photos like that all the time. (ETA: No she doesn't dress up as Santa so young Latin men/congressional pages can sit on her lap).

 

[Elixir]

So what's the bottom line here? Between the facetiousness, sarcasm, satirical commentary and factual reporting I can't tell.

Matt Gaetz has an out of wedlock son?
Matt Gaetz adopted his girlfriend's brother?
Matt Gaetz's gay lover is his dead girlfriend's son?

It's all too much, and inquiring minds want to know!