Stormy Daniels has lots of memories of Donald Trump’s penis — and they’re all bad

[phands]

This will drive the shitgibbon even more crazy than he is now....

President Donald Trump suffers from a toadstool-shaped penis and is blighted by “Yeti pubes,” according to porn star Stormy Daniels’ forthcoming book.

The revelations about Trump’s peculiarities come in a Tuesday report by the Guardian, after the newspaper landed an early copy of the tell-all memoir, “Full Disclosure.”
The book covers Daniels’ entire life, from growing up in Baton Rouge as Stephanie Clifford, to her rise through the porn industry to her claim that she had an affair with then-businessman Trump in 2006.

Daniels’ book is due to land on Oct. 2, with the release of early excerpts coming just weeks after the White House was forced to deal with the revelations in Bob Woodward’s book, “Fear: Trump in the White House.”
Trump has consistently denied having an affair with the adult film actress.

As well as describing the president’s “mushroom,” Daniels reveals why she went public with the alleged affair, why she signed a $130,000 hush agreement, and her disbelief at Trump winning the Republican nomination and ultimately the presidency.
“It will never happen, I would say,” Daniels writes. “He doesn’t even want to be president.”
Here are five of the most shocking revelations from the book:

SMALL, BUT NOT FREAKISHLY SMALL
That is how Daniels described Trump’s penis. It was “smaller than average” but “not freakishly small,” the porn star recalls. “He knows he has an unusual penis. It has a huge mushroom head. Like a toadstool.

”LEAST IMPRESSIVE SEX EVER
Daniels describes how she was disgusted with herself for getting into a situation when she was having sex with Trump. “I lay there, annoyed that I was getting fucked by a guy with Yeti pubes and a dick like the mushroom character in Mario Kart,” she says. “It may have been the least impressive sex I’d ever had, but clearly, he didn’t share that opinion,” the actress added.

HILLARY CALLED TRUMP DURING "SHARK WEEK"
Daniels has spoken previously about Trump’s obsession with the Discovery Channel’s “Shark Week.” In the book she recalls that in 2007 while she was in his hotel room watching the show, Trump took a call from Hillary Clinton, who at the time was running against Barack Obama for the Democratic presidential nomination.
“Then, to make it crazier, Hillary Clinton called,” Daniels writes. “He had a whole conversation about the race, repeatedly mentioning ‘our plan’.”
But Clinton couldn’t distract him from the sharks: “Even while he was on the phone with Hillary, his attention kept going back to the sharks.”

CHEATING ON "THE APPRENTICE"
Daniels claims she kept answering Trump’s phone calls in the hope that he would follow through on a promise to put her in his reality show “The Apprentice.” She claims he even promised to rig the show so she could remain there for longer.
“We’ll figure out a way to get you the challenges beforehand, and we can devise your technique,” Trump is quoted as saying, with Daniels claiming, “he was going to have me cheat, and it was 100 percent his idea.”

“EECH”
Daniels describes her reaction to seeing Trump on TV for years after she had slept with him, and it’s not exactly a fond memory. “‘I had sex with that’, I’d say to myself. Eech.”

https://news.vice.com/en_us/article/pa8pbm/stormy-daniels-book-trump-penis

 

[Jimmy Higgins]

Wonderful.

 

[Tom Sawyer]

Wait, he was going to cheat on the Apprentice for her?

I've been able to look past all the lies, bad policies, unnecessary trade wars, incompetence, stupidity and treason, but rigging things on a reality TV show is where I draw the line about what's acceptable.

I am hereby withdraw my support for Donald Trump.

 

[Elixir]

Wait, he was going to cheat on the Apprentice for her?

I've been able to look past all the lies, bad policies, unnecessary trade wars, incompetence, stupidity and treason, but rigging things on a reality TV show is where I draw the line about what's acceptable.

I am hereby withdraw my support for Donald Trump.

I think you may have hit upon the only thing that could possibly shake "the base". Murder someone in cold blood on 5th Avenue? No problem. But let it be known that The Apprentice was less than a fully above-board, transparent look into the actual workings of Trump enterprises, and the whole charade could fall apart.

 

[marc]

Can we get the Discovery channel to run Shark Week every week for the next few months? Just until impeachment proceedings start.

 

[Tom Sawyer]

Since there was a cash prize on The Apprentice and Trump was willing to cheat to help out favoured contestants, does that mean that the people who were fired can sue him for fraud or something?

 

[Jimmy Higgins]

Since there was a cash prize on The Apprentice and Trump was willing to cheat to help out favoured contestants, does that mean that the people who were fired can sue him for fraud or something?

Only if they paid into the system. Also, seeing how none of this happened and Stormy Daniels got screwed... err... twice by Trump, it isn't particularly relevant regarding that type of fraud.

 

[blastula]

Shit, now we can expect tweets about his toad dick.

 

[Tom Sawyer]

Since there was a cash prize on The Apprentice and Trump was willing to cheat to help out favoured contestants, does that mean that the people who were fired can sue him for fraud or something?

Only if they paid into the system. Also, seeing how none of this happened and Stormy Daniels got screwed... err... twice by Trump, it isn't particularly relevant regarding that type of fraud.

Ya, she didn't get onto the show so there's no fraud involving her specifically, but if he's willing to rig the game for favoured contestants, that would seem to be an actionable item in regards to other contestants. It might be enough to get all the tapes released from that producer who's keeping them hidden and have mo embarrassing stuff about Trump put out there. Not that anymore is needed of course, but you can never really have enough of that.

 

[untermensche]

Even if he had the most magnificent dick that ever was it is still just a dick.

Do we really want to be reduced to talking about dicks?

It would not make anything he says more sane.

It would not give him mature emotions like empathy and compassion.

It would not make him less dangerous to the survival of everyone.

 

[phands]

Even if he had the most magnificent dick that ever was it is still just a dick.

Do we really want to be reduced to talking about dicks?

It would not make anything he says more sane.

It would not give him mature emotions like empathy and compassion.

It would not make him less dangerous to the survival of everyone.

All true, but that's not the reason this is coming up.
It's going to drive trumpo even more batshit crazy than he is now. He's sensitive about it...even mentioning it on stage during campaigning when the "little hands, little dick" thing surfaced.

 

[ZiprHead]

I could have gone my entire life without reading the OP.

Now I can't.

 

[ruby sparks]

[YOUTUBE]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d8tPpS7MI6s[/YOUTUBE]

 

[untermensche]

Even if he had the most magnificent dick that ever was it is still just a dick.

Do we really want to be reduced to talking about dicks?

It would not make anything he says more sane.

It would not give him mature emotions like empathy and compassion.

It would not make him less dangerous to the survival of everyone.

All true, but that's not the reason this is coming up.
It's going to drive trumpo even more batshit crazy than he is now. He's sensitive about it...even mentioning it on stage during campaigning when the "little hands, little dick" thing surfaced.

We need to rid ourselves of this stain on American history.

I am no strategist.

But whatever gets rid of him at the next election is good.

Trump is an obese pear-shaped bald elderly man that wears a costume of a younger man everyday. He is a strange joke. Hanging onto the appearance of youth with such extremes. A ridiculous clown.

But none of that matters.

What matters is he is dangerous and like many of the rich sees the entire population as just something to lie to and serve him.

 

[phands]

The country cannot survive until 2020 under this administration in current form. Dems have to take back control and turn him into a lame-duck by stopping his every move. Or impeach and remove him, and stall Pence's every xtian impulse for 2 years.

 

[blastula]

On the plus side, Melania will now know for sure that he cheated.

 

[Keith&Co.]

On the plus side, Melania will now know for sure that he cheated.

Well, I doubt that came as a surprise, but I do wonder if it was mentioned in the prenup.

 

[Opoponax]

On the plus side, Melania will now know for sure that he cheated.

Well, I doubt that came as a surprise, but I do wonder if it was mentioned in the prenup.

Hell. It was almost certainly understood that infidelity would be a feature of the marriage.

"We make baby, give me money, you fuck what you want" was probably in the agreement. Maybe in more eloquent terms, but there nonetheless.

I can actually garner a certain amount of sympathy for super wealthy people within the narrow subject of romance because they'll never know if the other person actually loves them. I feel no such sympathy for Trump. He's as deep as a dinner plate and as obnoxious as a super-concentrated hangover fart.

 

[phands]

I could have gone my entire life without reading the OP.

Now I can't.

Yeah...sorry about that.

It's doubly worse for those of us with pictorial imaginations.

 

[Underseer]

So because of the president's adultery, we are hearing detailed descriptions of the presidential penis.

During the Clinton administration, this was cited as a valid reason to impeach the president and remove him from office.

So why aren't all the conservatives and libertarians (who are completely different, but just happen to take similar positions) screaming for the immediate removal of Trump from office given that he is an adulterer, a perjurer, and little Johnny might hear about Nasty Things because of the president's immorality? Shouldn't we stop everything the government is doing (including going after terrorists) in order to focus everything on removing the president from office?

Is there some reason that lying about a blow job is grounds for impeachment, but lying about treason isn't?