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Iambic pentameter thread (it's rooted in the Shakespeare thread, he said)

WAB

WAB

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Can any kind of cat be in the box?




Your answers must be in the proper form.

I mean the proper meter. Call me Norm.

No, don't. My name is William. Call me Bill.

I'm feminine and really rather silly.

So call me Bill. But never call me Billy.
 
Only two kinds of cat can be enboxed.

Live cat's preferred but dead is allowed,

for either satisfies our protocol.
 
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And if you'd rather you can call me Jill.

This thread's about the sound, about technique.

And about Stratford, and, of course, a Will.
 
One does not any cat embox, y'know.
They choose their own emboxment, if at all.
So when, at play, the cardboard overturns.
A cat may choose to loiter to imply
A situation planned out long before
'til some unwary foot should wander close
Then that soft prey will feel the feline wrath
Of Mighty Paws.
 
spikepipsqueak said:
One does not any cat embox, y'know.
They choose their own emboxment, if at all.
So when, at play, the cardboard overturns.
A cat may choose to loiter to imply
A situation planned out long before
'til some unwary foot should wander close
Then that soft prey will feel the feline wrath
Of Mighty Paws.
Click to expand...

Spike-Speare!

What I really like is that you ended it with a typically Shakespearian enjambment, and you get two extra points for capitalising the formidable Mighty Paws.

But please all, feel free to ignore this thread. I was in a manic fervor last night.

There will probably be a lot of weirdity coming from me in upcoming days.
 
"Da dum da dum da dum da dum da dum." This is how I stop compulsively counting in my head while doing countable things that don't actually need counting. That's all I have for iambic pentameter.
 
cat2.jpg


WAB said:
Wiploc said:
Only two kinds of cat can be enboxed.

Live cat's preferred but dead is allowed.

Our protocol is satisfied whichever.
Click to expand...

Your middle line is muddled. Spain it, Lucy.
Click to expand...


You're right. That's unclear. Thanks for the heads up.


When we open the box, the wave function collapses to reveal that the cat is either dead or alive. We'd rather have it alive, because then it can purr enjoy tuna and stuff. But the uncertainty principle is illustrated either way, regardless of whether the cat is dead or alive.

The question is what kind of cat can be in the box.

The answer is two kinds: alive and dead. But we'd rather have the live one.

Line two: Live cat's preferred but dead is allowed.

It would be clearer this way, "A live cat is preferred, but a dead cat is allowed.

But that wouldn't be iambic pentameter.

WAB's solution is perfect: "We want the cat alive, but dead's okay."

catwrong.JPG
 
My freshman English teacher taught us how
To scan the lines of poems and odes and such.
The lines of sonnets always scan he said
As iambs, nothing else would do for them.
So then he gave to test us an exam
In scanning poems of famous scribes of yore:
“When to the sessions of sweet silent thought
“I summon up remembrance of things past.
“I sigh the lack of many a thing I sought
“And with old woes new wail my dear times waste.”
To blow the minds of freshman was his love.
He’s damned to hell forever; may he rot!

(I'm sorry but line number four is rough)
 
Tharmas said:
My freshman English teacher taught us how
To scan the lines of poems and odes and such.
The lines of sonnets always scan he said
As iambs, nothing else would do for them.
So then he gave to test us an exam
In scanning poems of famous scribes of yore:
“When to the sessions of sweet silent thought
“I summon up remembrance of things past.
“I sigh the lack of many a thing I sought
“And with old woes new wail my dear times waste.”
To blow the minds of freshman was his love.
He’s damned to hell forever; may he rot!

(I'm sorry but line number four is rough)
Click to expand...

I don't know why you think line four is rough.*
If you divide it into feet, in each foot the second syllable has more stress than the first.
That's the definition of iambic. The line is perfectly iambic.

As i | ambs, noth | ing else | would do | for them.

I'd put commas around, "he said," in line three, and a period after, "iambs," in line four. That helps me follow the enjambment, and it's grammatically better (no run-on sentence).

* My first line scans as iambic pentameter, but that's purely accidental.
 
WAB won't like this......:p

I studied Shakespeare a long time ago
I no longer like his words, this I know
Cats in a box are a problem for me
Who wants them to suffer in misery
Or are the kitties dead and need some peace
If they still breathe, they need a quick release
What the fuck are we talking about here
Shakespeare gives me a navel gazing stare
But some here seem to disagree with me
Take your cats and Shakepeare and set me free
I have so many better things to do
And if you're being honest, so do you
I better leave before I get a boo


That was one line short of a sonnet too.
 
Here's a  Villanelle I wrote. (Checking the time-stamp I see I last edited it Sept. 2018. Time flies!)

Do not accept these politics of hate
Trump bluffs and farts and mocks but mostly lies.
Rise up and fight before it is too late

So Christians worshiping God's glory great
Who strive to see the world with loving eyes
Do not accept these politics of hate

So women often treated as mere bait
Then told by Trump that guys will just be guys
Rise up and fight before it is too late

So Blacks and those who care about Blacks' fate
Or mourn when Liberty's great Statue cries
Do not accept these politics of hate

So Soldiers risking lives to save the state
While Trump's men sell our Land to Russian spies
Rise up and fight before it is too late

Though Wall Street feasts while profits do inflate
A righteous man unbowed stays strong and tries
To not accept these politics of hate
To rise and fight before it is too late​

One reason I didn't "publish" this villanelle, was my indecisiveness. Here's the finaL quatrain of an alternate version with different refrain:

Who could think that this was who we need?
This thug that Russian mobster money buys.
This sociopathic Trump is Devil's seed.
Do not bow down to this false god of greed.​
 
So many cats have I they barely fit.
A black-and-white, a tabby; still some more:
three solid black, the siblings of the first.
Elected leader's said to want a cat.
Is Biden's future house itself a box?
A Quantum Sup'position: Who's the Pres'?
 
I am a little smarty, so it seems.
I engineered enjambment, unawares.
It sounds more like a way to get the cat
Into the box than any poetic device.




Thanks, WAB. It's ages since I've played around like this. I'd forgotten how much fun it is.
 
Last edited:
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southernhybrid said:
WAB won't like this......:p

I studied Shakespeare a long time ago
I no longer like his words, this I know
Cats in a box are a problem for me
Who wants them to suffer in misery
Or are the kitties dead and need some peace
If they still breathe, they need a quick release
What the fuck are we talking about here
Shakespeare gives me a navel gazing stare
But some here seem to disagree with me
Take your cats and Shakepeare and set me free
I have so many better things to do
And if you're being honest, so do you
I better leave before I get a boo


That was one line short of a sonnet too.
Click to expand...

Sorry SOHY, I was in a manic state and thought that we could all converse in iambic pentameter and that it might be funny.

I used the old cat in the box thingy because it's popular and thinky and cats in boxes is funny and the words cat and box are good for IP.

My theory is that whoever wrote Shakespeare was a native genius, probably an autodidact. Writing the way he/she did was easy for them. It came naturally and in great abundance. I don't think that anyone who was a middling poet in their thirties could possibly have written the work that is attributed to Shakespeare.
 
Last edited:
Bomb#20 said:
So many cats have I they barely fit.
A black-and-white, a tabby; still some more:
three solid black, the siblings of the first.
Elected leader's said to want a cat.
Is Biden's future house itself a box?
A Quantum Sup'position: Who's the Pres'?
Click to expand...

:joy:
 
spikepipsqueak said:
I am a little smarty, so it seems.
I engineered enjambment, unawares.
It sounds more like a way to get the cat
Into the box than any poetic device.




Thanks, WAB. It's ages since I've played around like this. I'd forgotten how much fun it is.
Click to expand...

Really?

Shakespeare very often enjambed his/her lines on/to the second or third beat, like you did. That is something Oxford rarely did.

Are you really doing it accidentally?

Good on ya! You're a natural.
 
Swammerdami said:
Here's a  Villanelle I wrote. (Checking the time-stamp I see I last edited it Sept. 2018. Time flies!)

Do not accept these politics of hate
Trump bluffs and farts and mocks but mostly lies.
Rise up and fight before it is too late

So Christians worshiping God's glory great
Who strive to see the world with loving eyes
Do not accept these politics of hate

So women often treated as mere bait
Then told by Trump that guys will just be guys
Rise up and fight before it is too late

So Blacks and those who care about Blacks' fate
Or mourn when Liberty's great Statue cries
Do not accept these politics of hate

So Soldiers risking lives to save the state
While Trump's men sell our Land to Russian spies
Rise up and fight before it is too late

Though Wall Street feasts while profits do inflate
A righteous man unbowed stays strong and tries
To not accept these politics of hate
To rise and fight before it is too late​

One reason I didn't "publish" this villanelle, was my indecisiveness. Here's the finaL quatrain of an alternate version with different refrain:

Who could think that this was who we need?
This thug that Russian mobster money buys.
This sociopathic Trump is Devil's seed.
Do not bow down to this false god of greed.​
Click to expand...

I have two vils I'm quite proud of, both posted in the Poetry thread hereabouts.

One is about Wounded Knee, the other is about poor Helga Goebbels.

Both were very difficult to write.

I like your vil. Well composed. :)
 
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