I also find it difficult to speak ill of the dead, regardless of my opinion of their life.
This is interesting. I used to subscribe to this. But then life taught me some of the stories of the victims of bad people. And how we contribute to their trauma by never acknowledging the crimes or harm of their abusers. And so for the rest of the victim’s lives, they STILL don’t get believed, or even comforted by the shared acknowledgement that the abuser WAS an abuser.
This has been profoundly impactful on me.
And it is summed up by the horrifying revelation in several cases, “we protected the wrong person’s feelings,” leading to additional harm for which we have to painfully admit our own responsibility.
And so no, I no longer have any trouble “speaking ill” of bad people. Whether they are alive or dead, I have no obligation to protects the feelings of the person who has done the harm.