There’s a pretty unequal power dynamic for someone who is 21. Add 5-10 years, same age difference and the power dynamic is much less.
What is a 'power dynamic', and what makes it unequal? Is sex between two adults with an unequal 'power dynamic' morally wrong? Why?
I'm going to go ahead and say some quiet part out loud, because I think it's likely relevant to some of the views in here.
The motivations for sex are generally different for men versus women.
Let that marinate a bit. Recognize that I'm not saying it's 100% true all the time. I have observed, however, that the relationships between lesbians are different from the relationships between hetero couples, which are different from the relationships between gay men. All of them include some element of sex, and usually some element of emotion. But the mixed are very different.
I strongly suspect that you and Tom view the situation in this thread through a VERY different lens than a hetero man would, and I suspect that the women in this thread view it differently than hetero men. Because generally speaking, women and men have different motivations in seeking sex.
When at least one of the participants is female, there's a very high likelihood that the older participant is taking advantage of their trust and their naivete. Seriously, young women are a mixed up gullible bunch when it comes to sex - especially hetero women, who don't really understand that most of the time men aren't there for the same reason women are.