DrZoidberg
Contributor
I think what's changed is that the internet has widened the pool of men to chase. In the past a woman who wasn't finding any more prospects at their desired level would get more realistic. Now the pool in reasonably dense areas is effectively infinite, they'll never run out of prospects to chase.
You correctly identified that men on the low end are basically locked out but then your solution is "put in the effort"--which you've already admitted isn't going to work.
And it is a social issue because large number of men with no prospects of a relationship become a social problem.
But whose fault is that? Whose responsibility is it to fix it?
All social problems are not subject to fixes. As a Buddhist would say, life is suffering. A "fix" would require women to defy their nature of not wanting to have sexual relationships with undesirable men.
I'm not saying that not putting the effort in won't work. But those low on the fuckability scale have nothing to lose by putting effort in. Any effort. Humans are sexual beings. Almost any sex is better than no sex.
I think your conceptual trap is thinking that it's a race where it only matters if you win or not. But there's rewards all along the way. It's just more rewards the more you win the race.
I work in IT. An experienced programmer churns out 20 times more high quality code than a n00b programmer, and requires less support. If two guys are the same age and the second one started out later, the experienced programmer will always be a better programmer. That's not an argument for the second programmer to never try. No matter where in your life you start out it's always a pay off if you put the work in.
And let's face it, the stuff that makes you attractive to the opposite sex, is the same stuff that you make you more attractive to yourself. It's ultimately a quest for self love and self acceptance. There's nothing more of a turn off than some needy fuck who needs you to fix their wide open gaping hole in their soul. Or worse, somebody who is willing to self destruct in order to save you. We're all happiest if we meet someone who is our equal and wants to go on an adventure together. People who are open and curious and are just in for a ride. That's just as true if it's for life or a one night stand.
I'm not going to pontificate on what people should do, since there's many ways to fuck this up. And I do NOT understand women. I have no idea why some women are super into me, while others, I have been super nice to, can't stand me. It's all just one big mystery. And that's part of the fun IMHO.