Trump Declines Nomination at Convention

[Jimmy Higgins]

CLEVELAND, OH -- In a stunning maneuver, the presumption nominee for the Republican Party, Donald J. Trump declined the nomination. The presumed nominee, who won the delegate count on the second day of the Convention, spent several minutes thanking his supporters. He then disclosed that Albania made him a much better offer to lead their country and he decided to take it. "$2 million, and I don't have to work with Congress," said Trump who then shrugged his shoulders. "Seems like win fucking win!" He then abruptly said "Goodbye!" and left the stage. The convention was silent for a few minutes, as the delegates and RNC tried to absorb what just happened. A motion was made to nominate a new candidate, but it was determined that the Convention rules forbid that from happening. So a subsequent motion was made to postpone the nominating process, which could be continued the following day.

Unfortunately, Quicken Loans arena already has scheduled a Justin Bieber concert the following night, so the convention announced they need to meet together in Room 534 of the Holiday Inn in Independence, Ohio Friday morning.

 

[Derec]

Did your calendar break or something?

 

[KeepTalking]

I think he is just a time traveler bringing us news of the near future. Seems legit.

 

[Tom Sawyer]

I think he is just a time traveler bringing us news of the near future. Seems legit.

And who controls the time travel machines? Obama's cronies, that's who. This is just one more example of the elitist liberal time travelers abusing the corrupt system in order to get the scoop on news stories over the decent, hard-working Fox News reporters.

 

[Elixir]

I think he is just a time traveler bringing us news of the near future. Seems legit.

Why didn't he take Trump back a ways so he could have already made America Great?

 

[ksen]

Are you one of those guys that goes to a Star Trek movie and complains all the way through about how they got the science all wrong?

 

[Toni]

CLEVELAND, OH -- In a stunning maneuver, the presumption nominee for the Republican Party, Donald J. Trump declined the nomination. The presumed nominee, who won the delegate count on the second day of the Convention, spent several minutes thanking his supporters. He then disclosed that Albania made him a much better offer to lead their country and he decided to take it. "$2 million, and I don't have to work with Congress," said Trump who then shrugged his shoulders. "Seems like win fucking win!" He then abruptly said "Goodbye!" and left the stage. The convention was silent for a few minutes, as the delegates and RNC tried to absorb what just happened. A motion was made to nominate a new candidate, but it was determined that the Convention rules forbid that from happening. So a subsequent motion was made to postpone the nominating process, which could be continued the following day.

Unfortunately, Quicken Loans arena already has scheduled a Justin Bieber concert the following night, so the convention announced they need to meet together in Room 534 of the Holiday Inn in Independence, Ohio Friday morning.

I would happily trade a winning powerball ticket for that to actually happen.

 

[Toni]

CLEVELAND, OH -- In a stunning maneuver, the presumption nominee for the Republican Party, Donald J. Trump declined the nomination. The presumed nominee, who won the delegate count on the second day of the Convention, spent several minutes thanking his supporters. He then disclosed that Albania made him a much better offer to lead their country and he decided to take it. "$2 million, and I don't have to work with Congress," said Trump who then shrugged his shoulders. "Seems like win fucking win!" He then abruptly said "Goodbye!" and left the stage. The convention was silent for a few minutes, as the delegates and RNC tried to absorb what just happened. A motion was made to nominate a new candidate, but it was determined that the Convention rules forbid that from happening. So a subsequent motion was made to postpone the nominating process, which could be continued the following day.

Unfortunately, Quicken Loans arena already has scheduled a Justin Bieber concert the following night, so the convention announced they need to meet together in Room 534 of the Holiday Inn in Independence, Ohio Friday morning.

I would happily trade a winning powerball ticket for that to actually happen.

 

[ksen]

No way. With Powerball money you could move to a country that's at least civilized and relatively sane.

 

[RavenSky]

I would actually watch the RNC convention to see it happen

 

[KeepTalking]

I think he is just a time traveler bringing us news of the near future. Seems legit.

Why didn't he take Trump back a ways so he could have already made America Great?

My assumption would be that he already tried that, and it resulted in the apocalypse, so this was the next best alternative.

 

[fast]

Did your calendar break or something?

I had a calendar one time that reflected September having 31 days.

 

[RavenSky]

Did your calendar break or something?

I had a calendar one time that reflected September having 31 days.

I once had a calendar that had every date on the wrong day in one of the month's.

 

[Keith&Co.]

I had a calendar one time that reflected September having 31 days.

I once had a calendar that had every date on the wrong day in one of the month's.

I tried to get into a limited area (holding nuclear weapons) without noticing that Pass & ID had issued me a badge that expired on the 35th of June.

The Marines noticed it.

That little poem "Thirty Days Hath September..." was recited to me about thirty times.

I promised to sing it to the women working the badge office as SOON as i had a chance. When they took the boot off my neck.