Images that make you laugh

[Wiploc]

Yes, we allow members to post their wares and services: https://iidb.org/forums/community-member-wares-and-services.70/

And the Eve story is great but only for that one thing. She stayed and mothered God's people. Not that I would fault her for it, but it's not the story of a free woman. Lilith, Adam's first wife, is the one for that story.

Well, neither was man. Man was a lowly servent, not anything special.

Narrative of the fall has several competing interpretations. Personally I find the serpent as the hero of God's deception.

The serpent was more cunning than the beasts Jehovah created.

I like the theory that the serpent, therefore, was Jehovah himself.

 

[Jimmy Higgins]

Well, neither was man. Man was a lowly servent, not anything special.

Narrative of the fall has several competing interpretations. Personally I find the serpent as the hero of God's deception.

The serpent was more cunning than the beasts Jehovah created.

I like the theory that the serpent, therefore, was Jehovah himself.

Hadn't heard that one. It doesn't make particular sense. God make man to be a servant in a magic garden. The whole point of the prohibition was to keep man simple, below god. It'd make little sense for God to then tease man and woman to defy the rule and then blather about how man and woman must be evicted from the Garden else they become like him. That plot reeks of Michael Bay.

 

[hurtinbuckaroo]

 

[Jimmy Higgins]

View attachment 48455

Cremation and a nice urn for a couple grand.

 

[Wiploc]

Well, neither was man. Man was a lowly servent, not anything special.

Narrative of the fall has several competing interpretations. Personally I find the serpent as the hero of God's deception.

The serpent was more cunning than the beasts Jehovah created.

I like the theory that the serpent, therefore, was Jehovah himself.

Hadn't heard that one. It doesn't make particular sense. God make man to be a servant in a magic garden. The whole point of the prohibition was to keep man simple, below god. It'd make little sense for God to then tease man and woman to defy the rule and then blather about how man and woman must be evicted from the Garden else they become like him. That plot reeks of Michael Bay.

The point is to increase god's glory. What could be more glorious than for god to save man from the most terrible fate?

Therefore, god devised a world with eternal Hellfire, the worst of all possible worlds, and he sentenced man to that fate. So that he could rescue us from it.

But wait, he can be more glorious yet. He can do more than rescue man from Hellfire; he can rescue undeserving man from Hellfire. But he can't make mankind flawed from the getgo. A flawed creation would give the impression of a flawed creator. No, he has to create man without flaw, and then contrive for man to Fall, to become flawed, to become undeserving of rescue. When god rescues us after that, after we have been created perfect but rejected god's goodness anyway, then god will be most deserving of praise. Hallelujah.

 

[unapologetic]

I like the theory that the serpent, therefore, was Jehovah himself.

'Theory' in the scientific sense.

 

[SLD]

View attachment 48455

Donate your body to science is the cheapest. $700 for my mom. We got her ashes back about 6 months later for free. We did get her a headstone and put her ashes under it. But it wasn’t much more.

 

[Wiploc]

I like the theory that the serpent, therefore, was Jehovah himself.

'Theory' in the scientific sense.

As much a scientific theory as any religious theory can be.

 

[Jimmy Higgins]

Well, neither was man. Man was a lowly servent, not anything special.

Narrative of the fall has several competing interpretations. Personally I find the serpent as the hero of God's deception.

The serpent was more cunning than the beasts Jehovah created.

I like the theory that the serpent, therefore, was Jehovah himself.

Hadn't heard that one. It doesn't make particular sense. God make man to be a servant in a magic garden. The whole point of the prohibition was to keep man simple, below god. It'd make little sense for God to then tease man and woman to defy the rule and then blather about how man and woman must be evicted from the Garden else they become like him. That plot reeks of Michael Bay.

The point is to increase god's glory. What could be more glorious than for god to save man from the most terrible fate?

Therefore, god devised a world with eternal Hellfire, the worst of all possible worlds, and he sentenced man to that fate. So that he could rescue us from it.

Yeah, but that is the fan fiction Yahweh, not the Tanakh Yahweh, who is just one stone cold mofo.

But wait, he can be more glorious yet. He can do more than rescue man from Hellfire; he can rescue undeserving man from Hellfire. But he can't make mankind flawed from the getgo. A flawed creation would give the impression of a flawed creator. No, he has to create man without flaw, and then contrive for man to Fall, to become flawed, to become undeserving of rescue. When god rescues us after that, after we have been created perfect but rejected god's goodness anyway, then god will be most deserving of praise. Hallelujah.

God allowed FIrefly to get cancelled. Fuck them*!

* it should be noted that the roll of Yahweh is of many roles: a father and a mother, so deriving a gender to them is not accurate

 

[Elixir]

View attachment 48455

Cremation and a nice urn for a couple grand.

That's a lot of coffee cans. Just sayin' ...

 

[Jimmy Higgins]

I like the theory that the serpent, therefore, was Jehovah himself.

'Theory' in the scientific sense.

As much a scientific theory as any religious theory can be.

Except the term for serpent in the narrative is one used for a literal serpent. That is one of the reasons why the "Satan" angle doesn't work. Because the term for Satan being a serpent is quite different.

Serpent: Hey woman, I heard you can't eat of the tree of knowledge of good and evil.
Woman: We can't even touch it, lest we die!
Serpent: Girl, you won't die, Your mind will be blown and God will see you know all sorts of high class stuff now.
Woman: Like how to pasteurize milk?
Serpent: Nope.
Woman: Cure disease?
Serpent: Nope.
Woman: How to cook meat properly so we don't get sick?
Serpent: Nope.
Woman: What in the heck do I learn?
Serpent: That you're naked!
Woman: That's it?!
Serpent: Well, a few other things...
Woman: Like how to use brick instead of stone, and tar for mortar.?
Serpent: Nope.
Woman: Then what else?
Serpent: A passing understanding on farming husbandry and astronomy.
Woman: ... and that we are naked... whatever that means.
Serpent: Win freaking win!
Woman: This better be worth it...

 

[Wiploc]

Well, neither was man. Man was a lowly servent, not anything special.

Narrative of the fall has several competing interpretations. Personally I find the serpent as the hero of God's deception.

The serpent was more cunning than the beasts Jehovah created.

I like the theory that the serpent, therefore, was Jehovah himself.

Hadn't heard that one. It doesn't make particular sense. God make man to be a servant in a magic garden. The whole point of the prohibition was to keep man simple, below god. It'd make little sense for God to then tease man and woman to defy the rule and then blather about how man and woman must be evicted from the Garden else they become like him. That plot reeks of Michael Bay.

The point is to increase god's glory. What could be more glorious than for god to save man from the most terrible fate?

Therefore, god devised a world with eternal Hellfire, the worst of all possible worlds, and he sentenced man to that fate. So that he could rescue us from it.

Yeah, but that is the fan fiction Yahweh, not the Tanakh Yahweh, who is just one stone cold mofo.

But wait, he can be more glorious yet. He can do more than rescue man from Hellfire; he can rescue undeserving man from Hellfire. But he can't make mankind flawed from the getgo. A flawed creation would give the impression of a flawed creator. No, he has to create man without flaw, and then contrive for man to Fall, to become flawed, to become undeserving of rescue. When god rescues us after that, after we have been created perfect but rejected god's goodness anyway, then god will be most deserving of praise. Hallelujah.

God allowed FIrefly to get cancelled. Fuck them*!

* it should be noted that the roll of Yahweh is of many roles: a father and a mother, so deriving a gender to them is not accurate

I asked Gemini about Tanakh. Apparently it is something to do with books and religion, which ,frankly, I assumed.

Most of what I know about Christianity, I learned in a Western Civilization class.

If your complaint--if it even was a complaint--is that my theory isn't written in the bible, then, yes, that's true.
I was talking about the Christian god, not the bible god. If Christians paid attention to the bible, then they wouldn't be Christians.

 

[Wiploc]

Well, neither was man. Man was a lowly servent, not anything special.

Narrative of the fall has several competing interpretations. Personally I find the serpent as the hero of God's deception.

The serpent was more cunning than the beasts Jehovah created.

I like the theory that the serpent, therefore, was Jehovah himself.

Hadn't heard that one. It doesn't make particular sense. God make man to be a servant in a magic garden. The whole point of the prohibition was to keep man simple, below god. It'd make little sense for God to then tease man and woman to defy the rule and then blather about how man and woman must be evicted from the Garden else they become like him. That plot reeks of Michael Bay.

The point is to increase god's glory. What could be more glorious than for god to save man from the most terrible fate?

Therefore, god devised a world with eternal Hellfire, the worst of all possible worlds, and he sentenced man to that fate. So that he could rescue us from it.

Yeah, but that is the fan fiction Yahweh, not the Tanakh Yahweh, who is just one stone cold mofo.

But wait, he can be more glorious yet. He can do more than rescue man from Hellfire; he can rescue undeserving man from Hellfire. But he can't make mankind flawed from the getgo. A flawed creation would give the impression of a flawed creator. No, he has to create man without flaw, and then contrive for man to Fall, to become flawed, to become undeserving of rescue. When god rescues us after that, after we have been created perfect but rejected god's goodness anyway, then god will be most deserving of praise. Hallelujah.

God allowed FIrefly to get cancelled. Fuck them*!

* it should be noted that the roll of Yahweh is of many roles: a father and a mother, so deriving a gender to them is not accurate

I asked Gemini about Tanakh. Apparently it is something to do with books and religion, which ,frankly, I assumed.

Most of what I know about Christianity, I learned in a Western Civilization class.

If your complaint--if it even was a complaint--is that my theory isn't written in the bible, then, yes, that's true.
I was talking about the Christian god, not the bible god. If Christians paid attention to the bible, then most of them wouldn't be Christians.

 

[Jimmy Higgins]

I asked Gemini about Tanakh. Apparently it is something to do with books and religion, which ,frankly, I assumed.

Is that a joke? The Tanakh is the Jewish Holy Book. Christians call it "The Old Testament".

Most of what I know about Christianity, I learned in a Western Civilization class.

If your complaint--if it even was a complaint--is that my theory isn't written in the bible, then, yes, that's true.
I was talking about the Christian god, not the bible god. If Christians paid attention to the bible, then they wouldn't be Christians.

There is no Christian God. There is just Yahweh... and they follow Yahweh very poorly.

 

[Wiploc]

I asked Gemini about Tanakh. Apparently it is something to do with books and religion, which ,frankly, I assumed.

Is that a joke? The Tanakh is the Jewish Holy Book. Christians call it "The Old Testament".

Most of what I know about Christianity, I learned in a Western Civilization class.

If your complaint--if it even was a complaint--is that my theory isn't written in the bible, then, yes, that's true.
I was talking about the Christian god, not the bible god. If Christians paid attention to the bible, then they wouldn't be Christians.

There is no Christian God.

Is that a joke? They've got lots of them.

 

[SLD]

I like the theory that the serpent, therefore, was Jehovah himself.

'Theory' in the scientific sense.

As much a scientific theory as any religious theory can be.

Except the term for serpent in the narrative is one used for a literal serpent. That is one of the reasons why the "Satan" angle doesn't work. Because the term for Satan being a serpent is quite different.

Serpent: Hey woman, I heard you can't eat of the tree of knowledge of good and evil.
Woman: We can't even touch it, lest we die!
Serpent: Girl, you won't die, Your mind will be blown and God will see you know all sorts of high class stuff now.
Woman: Like how to pasteurize milk?
Serpent: Nope.
Woman: Cure disease?
Serpent: Nope.
Woman: How to cook meat properly so we don't get sick?
Serpent: Nope.
Woman: What in the heck do I learn?
Serpent: That you're naked!
Woman: That's it?!
Serpent: Well, a few other things...
Woman: Like how to use brick instead of stone, and tar for mortar.?
Serpent: Nope.
Woman: Then what else?
Serpent: A passing understanding on farming husbandry and astronomy.
Woman: ... and that we are naked... whatever that means.
Serpent: Win freaking win!
Woman: This better be worth it...

Well, to be fair, he should tell them that they’ll at least have the ability to figure out quantum physics. Eventually.

 

[Jimmy Higgins]

I asked Gemini about Tanakh. Apparently it is something to do with books and religion, which ,frankly, I assumed.

Is that a joke? The Tanakh is the Jewish Holy Book. Christians call it "The Old Testament".

Most of what I know about Christianity, I learned in a Western Civilization class.

If your complaint--if it even was a complaint--is that my theory isn't written in the bible, then, yes, that's true.
I was talking about the Christian god, not the bible god. If Christians paid attention to the bible, then they wouldn't be Christians.

There is no Christian God.

Is that a joke?

Mild one I suppose. Jesus is a Jewish male, who is the "son" of the Hebrew God. So I do not accept that the Christians have their own god. They simply worship the Hebrew one very poorly.

They've got lots of them.

I suppose one could argue that they don't even worship a god, but follow a cultist named Paul.

 

[Angry Floof]

 

[hurtinbuckaroo]

 

[ZiprHead]

I suppose one could argue that they don't even worship a god, but follow a cultist named Paul.

Paul was an asshole. I also think he was quite crazy. As those who convert later in life so often do, he went way overboard.