Let's fuck!

[SLD]

Let's Fuck!

Anybody interested in getting laid? With me of course! All comers welcome. Male or female.

Now before you get all upset, let me explain. If we were like Bonobo chimps, the above statement would generate no controversy. Your response might be, "Uh, I could fit you in at 4:30, but you'd have to hurry because Mike is coming by at 6, and Lisa is scheduled for a 3:00 o'clock session." Bonobos are of course famous for living an orgiastic existence, involving both gay and straight sexual activity. But I suspect if I truly said the above in polite society (and even not so polite society), I'd be run out of town and tarred and feathered. But at the same time, we all crave sex and fantasize about living the Bonobo chimp lifestyle - heterosexually if not bisexually at least. Sex is pleasurable; so why don't we constantly do it? And what difference would it make if you're in a relationship? Why would your partner care if you engage in pleasurable activities without him/her? I suspect you do a lot of things that you enjoy without your partner. Why should sex be any different?

And why should it matter if it were gay or straight sex? Presumably gay sex is pleasurable as well. But why then are heterosexual people turned off by it?

So what's the big deal? Let's get naked!

SLD

 

[ideologyhunter]

Are you Donald Trump?

 

[PyramidHead]

I've often thought about the same thing, but related to monogamy generally. Because of the way our genes and culture have intertwined in the last millennium or so, we have settled upon this strange idea that the person who you are sexually compatible with, the person you are intellectually excited by, the person you want to go on adventures with, and the person with whom you enjoy a strong bond of emotional companionship must be numerically the same person. There's no rational justification for it, it's just what makes most people comfortable, although as you rightly point out, many of those same people would also paradoxically enjoy consequence-free sex with a partner of their choosing.

 

[bigfield]

Heinlein's Stranger in a Strange Land explored this. Basically, if humans lived in a commune and all loved each other we would permit this kind of free love because it makes our loved ones happy.

 

[J842P]

Let's Fuck!

Anybody interested in getting laid? With me of course! All comers welcome. Male or female.

Now before you get all upset, let me explain. If we were like Bonobo chimps, the above statement would generate no controversy. Your response might be, "Uh, I could fit you in at 4:30, but you'd have to hurry because Mike is coming by at 6, and Lisa is scheduled for a 3:00 o'clock session." Bonobos are of course famous for living an orgiastic existence, involving both gay and straight sexual activity. But I suspect if I truly said the above in polite society (and even not so polite society), I'd be run out of town and tarred and feathered. But at the same time, we all crave sex and fantasize about living the Bonobo chimp lifestyle - heterosexually if not bisexually at least. Sex is pleasurable; so why don't we constantly do it? And what difference would it make if you're in a relationship? Why would your partner care if you engage in pleasurable activities without him/her? I suspect you do a lot of things that you enjoy without your partner. Why should sex be any different?

And why should it matter if it were gay or straight sex? Presumably gay sex is pleasurable as well. But why then are heterosexual people turned off by it?

So what's the big deal? Let's get naked!

SLD

There's this thing called biology and evolution, which is the context where our behaviors are generated. Your answers lie at the intersection of that and social behavioral science.

 

[SLD]

Are you Donald Trump?

If I were Donald trump I wouldn't ask. I'd just do it.

 

[BH]

I am way behind the times in Anthropology but it was theorized in the nineteenth century based on the most primitive peoples living them that free love was pretty much the norm in prehistoric times, or at least until the idea of and enough private property could be held to be worth passing on to your own children. Is this theory still current?

 

[Valjean]

I am way behind the times in Anthropology but it was theorized in the nineteenth century based on the most primitive peoples living them that free love was pretty much the norm in prehistoric times, or at least until the idea of and enough private property could be held to be worth passing on to your own children. Is this theory still current?

No.

 

[Tigers!]

The title is a most effective click bait.

 

[gmbteach]

The title is a most effective click bait.

Yes, though the ensuing discussion should be good.

Personally, I am a one man woman. And for me, intimacy doesn't just mean sex. But then, isn't that what MOST women say?

 

[SLD]

Heinlein's Stranger in a Strange Land explored this. Basically, if humans lived in a commune and all loved each other we would permit this kind of free love because it makes our loved ones happy.

I'm skeptical that human jealousies could be so easily overcome. If saw someone having sex with the woman I am in love with, I would be extremely upset. I would be jealous and emotionally hurt. I would wonder what he has that I don't. Even though it may just be a momentary desire and I wasn't around.

SLD

 

[SLD]

The title is a most effective click bait.

Yes, though the ensuing discussion should be good.

Personally, I am a one man woman. And for me, intimacy doesn't just mean sex. But then, isn't that what MOST women say?

A woman's perspective is indeed vital to the discussion. Please do go on. Intimacy is all well and good, and we men want that too, but sometimes don't you just want to desperately want to get some? So why don't you? What if a hot movie star like Brad Pitt made a pass at you when you were just horny and your husband wasn't around? (My wife says I'd be in trouble in such a scenario). But what is it that stops you? Is there a biological reason not to, or is it social? Are you afraid of the gossip such actions would cause? Or is there a more fundamental reason related to our reproductive imperative that compels you to stick to one guy - like virtually all women I know.

SLD

 

[gmbteach]

Yes, though the ensuing discussion should be good.

Personally, I am a one man woman. And for me, intimacy doesn't just mean sex. But then, isn't that what MOST women say?

A woman's perspective is indeed vital to the discussion. Please do go on. Intimacy is all well and good, and we men want that too, but sometimes don't you just want to desperately want to get some? So why don't you? What if a hot movie star like Brad Pitt made a pass at you when you were just horny and your husband wasn't around? (My wife says I'd be in trouble in such a scenario). But what is it that stops you? Is there a biological reason not to, or is it social? Are you afraid of the gossip such actions would cause? Or is there a more fundamental reason related to our reproductive imperative that compels you to stick to one guy - like virtually all women I know.

SLD

i understand your question, but have not experienced that urgent need to have that sort of sex except with my husband. I am sure you know about our first date where the waitress thought we were celebrating na anniversary or something rather than it being a first date.

If Brad Pitt came up to me I wouldn't touch him with a barge pole because looks so not maketh the man. The most gorgeous guy in the world (second to my husband) would also need to be caring etc for me to want to do anything. It's about the connection you have with that person.

 

[Unbeatable]

But at the same time, we all crave sex and fantasize about living the Bonobo chimp lifestyle - heterosexually if not bisexually at least.

Is this statement as disingenuous as the offer? Or are you honestly under the impression that it's true?

 

[SLD]

A woman's perspective is indeed vital to the discussion. Please do go on. Intimacy is all well and good, and we men want that too, but sometimes don't you just want to desperately want to get some? So why don't you? What if a hot movie star like Brad Pitt made a pass at you when you were just horny and your husband wasn't around? (My wife says I'd be in trouble in such a scenario). But what is it that stops you? Is there a biological reason not to, or is it social? Are you afraid of the gossip such actions would cause? Or is there a more fundamental reason related to our reproductive imperative that compels you to stick to one guy - like virtually all women I know.

SLD

i understand your question, but have not experienced that urgent need to have that sort of sex except with my husband. I am sure you know about our first date where the waitress thought we were celebrating na anniversary or something rather than it being a first date.

If Brad Pitt came up to me I wouldn't touch him with a barge pole because looks so not maketh the man. The most gorgeous guy in the world (second to my husband) would also need to be caring etc for me to want to do anything. It's about the connection you have with that person.

Yes, but you haven't addressed the question. Why is that the way you (and indeed the vast majority of other women) feel? Does such convey a biological advantage to you, or is it merely a social convention? If it's biological what particular advantage does that convey vs. living a sexual libertine lifestyle?

SLD

- - - Updated - - -

But at the same time, we all crave sex and fantasize about living the Bonobo chimp lifestyle - heterosexually if not bisexually at least.

Is this statement as disingenuous as the offer? Or are you honestly under the impression that it's true?

While there are a few people who have no sex drive virtually all of us do in fact crave sex.

 

[Unbeatable]

But at the same time, we all crave sex and fantasize about living the Bonobo chimp lifestyle - heterosexually if not bisexually at least.

Is this statement as disingenuous as the offer? Or are you honestly under the impression that it's true?

While there are a few people who have no sex drive virtually all of us do in fact crave sex.

Are you using the word "crave" to encompass all non-zero levels of sexual desire?

Also, what about the rest of the quoted statement? i.e. your assertion that we all fantasize about living the bonobo chimp lifestyle?

 

[SLD]

But at the same time, we all crave sex and fantasize about living the Bonobo chimp lifestyle - heterosexually if not bisexually at least.

Is this statement as disingenuous as the offer? Or are you honestly under the impression that it's true?

While there are a few people who have no sex drive virtually all of us do in fact crave sex.

Are you using the word "crave" to encompass all non-zero levels of sexual desire?

Also, what about the rest of the quoted statement? i.e. your assertion that we all fantasize about living the bonobo chimp lifestyle?

Sexual cravings are the strongest cravings men experience. Compared to any other enjoyment man seeks, sex is by far the most pleasurable and most desired. A man may enjoy playing golf with his friends, but there are few golf games played where sex isn't discussed in some fashion. Every man I know with whom I've mentioned the Bonobo chimp lifestyle to has quipped something to the effect of that sounds nice. There's an allure to living such a lifestyle undoubtedly. But we almost all pull back from such. And my question is why is that?

If sex is so pleasurable why is that we don't just constantly do it? What is it about human nature that stops us from being like Bonobos?

SLD

 

[gmbteach]

SLD,

To answer your question about why I feel this way, the truth is IDK. Personally, I have found someone who cares for me, nurtured me, and at times, provides for me. We are a partnership.

In days of old, perhaps a woman as only looking for someone to look after her. Times are changing. Society is changing. Our society is anyway.

Some American Indian cultures, I believe, were as you describe as your 'desire' and they would fornicate willy nilly with any offspring recognised as the husbands or mothers brothers responsibility.

For me, I guess it's how I was raised.

I just don't know.

 

[Wiploc]

Let's Fuck!

Anybody interested in getting laid? With me of course! All comers welcome. Male or female.

I'm reminded of an incident from, I think, Semi Tough. The book, not the movie.

This guy crashes a party, doing a backflip in at the door. He lands on his feet, turns around, and shouts, "Who here wants to fight or fuck? Either one, because I don't get out much."

 

[4321lynx]

But at the same time, we all crave sex and fantasize about living the Bonobo chimp lifestyle - heterosexually if not bisexually at least.

Is this statement as disingenuous as the offer? Or are you honestly under the impression that it's true?

While there are a few people who have no sex drive virtually all of us do in fact crave sex.

Are you using the word "crave" to encompass all non-zero levels of sexual desire?

Also, what about the rest of the quoted statement? i.e. your assertion that we all fantasize about living the bonobo chimp lifestyle?

Sexual cravings are the strongest cravings men experience. Compared to any other enjoyment man seeks, sex is by far the most pleasurable and most desired. A man may enjoy playing golf with his friends, but there are few golf games played where sex isn't discussed in some fashion. Every man I know with whom I've mentioned the Bonobo chimp lifestyle to has quipped something to the effect of that sounds nice. There's an allure to living such a lifestyle undoubtedly. But we almost all pull back from such. And my question is why is that?

If sex is so pleasurable why is that we don't just constantly do it? What is it about human nature that stops us from being like Bonobos?

SLD

Didn't the Hippies do it? Aided by drugs? And did they just find it boring, or "not enough" even with drugs? Where are the hippies of yesteryear? Did they just inaugurate the modern citydweller's lifestyle and then fade away? There is some resemblance between the lifestyles is there not? The obsession with drugs and sex, for instance ?

And are those stories of Bonobos really true, or perhaps exaggerated a bit by the envious investigators' subconcious sex-obsessed imaginations? I mean where is this Bonobo Paradise Garden where they don't have to woprry about predators, or their food supply, or of themselves becoming food of the worst predator on earth -- man (OK maybe woman is worse )
I mean how big a group, and/or how many groups of Bonobos, were studied? Are they still around or has their carefree mode of life led to to their extinction or decimation? Was the original work peer reviewed?