Which movie did you watch today and how would you rate it?

[TSwizzle]

King Arthur - Legend of the Sword 1 / 10

Umm ... Wut?

This was the most incoherent piece of drivel I've seen in a long time. I'm fairly certain that the writer and the director never once talked to each other and nobody bothered to reconcile the different visions of the film. Then the editor was a dyslexic guy on crack who was just randomly pressing buttons to put scenes together.

They half went for a gangster movie and half went for a fantasy movie and the two halves didn't mesh at all, despite often being mixed together in the same scene. The scenes were then cutting back and forth to each other and finishing up one part twenty minutes after another scene was running. Also there are a lot if flashbacks and they flashed back to one scene and shows the same thing ten times over.

The only reason I have any idea what the plot of this movie was is that I was previously aware of the King Arthur story and I recognized a couple of items from that randomly interspersed through all the other nonsense that was happening.

Utter crap. If somebody invites you to go see this, punch that asshole in the face.

The reviews have been dreadful for this movie since before it was released. Has Guy Ritchie done a decent movie recently ?

 

[Sarpedon]

I used to love Guy Ritchie

 

[TSwizzle]

I haven't watched a Ritchie movie since RocknRolla (released 2008) which was a bit crap but I really enjoyed Lock Stock and Two Smoking Barrels and Snatch.

 

[Jayjay]

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only on her claws, so her claws will be undersized when she grows up.

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er... bones don't grow from the tip backwards, so actually she'd grow up and end up having claws tipped in adamantium that are bone at the base.

That is assuming her claws have bones connected to them. Does the movie continuity use the whole bone claw thing, or are they just basically weapons installed in their bodies? I don't remember.

In Logan though, Xavier said that Laura's foot claws were adaptation due to her gender, so that implies she does have bone claws. But Xavier was a demented old coot and that makes no scientific sense whatsoever.

(Skipping spoilers because, come on, anyone who cares about spoilers for Logan knows the characters and their basic traits already. It's not an important plot point.)

 

[KeepTalking]

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er... bones don't grow from the tip backwards, so actually she'd grow up and end up having claws tipped in adamantium that are bone at the base.

That is assuming her claws have bones connected to them. Does the movie continuity use the whole bone claw thing, or are they just basically weapons installed in their bodies? I don't remember.

In Logan though, Xavier said that Laura's foot claws were adaptation due to her gender, so that implies she does have bone claws. But Xavier was a demented old coot and that makes no scientific sense whatsoever.

(Skipping spoilers because, come on, anyone who cares about spoilers for Logan knows the characters and their basic traits already. It's not an important plot point.)

Yes. In Days of Future Past before Wolverine was in the Weapon X program, he had bone claws.

 

[Shadowy Man]

That is assuming her claws have bones connected to them. Does the movie continuity use the whole bone claw thing, or are they just basically weapons installed in their bodies? I don't remember.

In Logan though, Xavier said that Laura's foot claws were adaptation due to her gender, so that implies she does have bone claws. But Xavier was a demented old coot and that makes no scientific sense whatsoever.

(Skipping spoilers because, come on, anyone who cares about spoilers for Logan knows the characters and their basic traits already. It's not an important plot point.)

Yes. In Days of Future Past before Wolverine was in the Weapon X program, he had bone claws.

Of course, the *real* Days of Future Past was in the comics, and the invention of bone claws as a mutant power of Wolverines originated over a decade after that storyline.

 

[snoiduspoitus]

"A Simple Plan"

Bill Paxton and Billy Bob Thornton.

Good guys who mean well in their hearts, but greed and circumstance fucks up their lives.

No car crashes, international espionage or explosions, just good acting and a nice story.

 

[thebeave]

King Arthur - Legend of the Sword 1 / 10

Umm ... Wut?

This was the most incoherent piece of drivel I've seen in a long time. I'm fairly certain that the writer and the director never once talked to each other and nobody bothered to reconcile the different visions of the film. Then the editor was a dyslexic guy on crack who was just randomly pressing buttons to put scenes together.

They half went for a gangster movie and half went for a fantasy movie and the two halves didn't mesh at all, despite often being mixed together in the same scene. The scenes were then cutting back and forth to each other and finishing up one part twenty minutes after another scene was running. Also there are a lot if flashbacks and they flashed back to one scene and shows the same thing ten times over.

The only reason I have any idea what the plot of this movie was is that I was previously aware of the King Arthur story and I recognized a couple of items from that randomly interspersed through all the other nonsense that was happening.

Utter crap. If somebody invites you to go see this, punch that asshole in the face.

The reviews have been dreadful for this movie since before it was released. Has Guy Ritchie done a decent movie recently ?

I think spending all those years around Madonna completely fried his brain.

 

[Opoponax]

Jason Bourne

Watched for about 7 minutes and stopped. The shaky, wobbly cam coupled with shots of less than a second forced me to turn it off. I found myself counting to see how long each shot lasted. I never made it to the count of three. It's like the director forced his camera operators to snort crystal meth and then smoke crack before being allowed to film. This type of filmmaking was novel 15 years ago, and then it fortunately and quickly went away. Being that I didn't actually watch the movie, I shouldn't give it a rating, but I will anyway.

Fucking Annoying/10

 

[Shadowy Man]

Jason Bourne

Watched for about 7 minutes and stopped. The shaky, wobbly cam coupled with shots of less than a second forced me to turn it off. I found myself counting to see how long each shot lasted. I never made it to the count of three. It's like the director forced his camera operators to snort crystal meth and then smoke crack before being allowed to film. This type of filmmaking was novel 15 years ago, and then it fortunately and quickly went away. Being that I didn't actually watch the movie, I shouldn't give it a rating, but I will anyway.

Fucking Annoying/10

Doug Liman didn't do this in the first Bourne movie, and I'm appreciative of that. In the latter films it was so disconcerting as to make certain scenes unwatchable.

 

[repoman]

Jason Bourne

Watched for about 7 minutes and stopped. The shaky, wobbly cam coupled with shots of less than a second forced me to turn it off. I found myself counting to see how long each shot lasted. I never made it to the count of three. It's like the director forced his camera operators to snort crystal meth and then smoke crack before being allowed to film. This type of filmmaking was novel 15 years ago, and then it fortunately and quickly went away. Being that I didn't actually watch the movie, I shouldn't give it a rating, but I will anyway.

Fucking Annoying/10

Not high resolution, but this may be the best uncut looking fight scene (no way it can be because of the bruising that Tony Jaa is getting) of all time.

 

[TV and credit cards]

In A World

where a daughter engages in an epic battle with her father for voice-over supremacy, only one will emerge victorious and earn the right, to step into Don LaFontaine's shoes.

7/10

 

[none]

Logan 4 of 10
Horrible, the only thing holding it together is captain Picard and he wasn't the lead

 

[none]

Hidden figures 7 of 10
The second half makes up for the first half
Pretty good

 

[Ford]

"It's So Easy and Other Lies."

Duff McKagen - former bass player for Guns N Roses and Velvet Revolver - turned his book tour into a stage show and movie.

It traces his journey from Seattle punk kid to world-spanning success, addiction, redemption, addiction again, and arrival at the place where he can tell his story onstage with a band.

The film was interesting to me because I always thought Duff was the guy in Guns who seemed to have his shit together. Yeah, not so much.

The thing that bugged me is that it glossed over so much. Made a big deal out of his first trip to sobriety (via a martial arts teacher) but didn't say much of a word about how he kicked pills in round two. Danced around the whole Scott Weiland thing. Didn't even mention Axl.

I'd give it a 5.5/10

 

[blastula]

Downfall 7/10

Maybe more well known for its use in the Downfall youtube meme, it's a pretty good Hitler movie. It covers the final two weeks of the Reich. Bruno Ganz is awesome as Hitler, as you may have seen from the meme. He does angry Hitler and gentle Hitler convincingly. The film does try to humanize him somewhat, he is good to his dog (till he kills him at least) and his secretaries like him. It also shows him as completely in denial about the course of the war to the very end. Several of his staff and friends are just as deluded, they act as if the Fuhrer can impose his will to fix anything, and they believe him when he keeps talking about how this or that army is about to save Berlin. Eva Braun is the next most in denial and wants to have dance parties while they are being shelled. His generals try to tell him the bad news, but he won't listen. Hitler's denial combined with paranoia means he can't abide any of his henchmen making any noises of surrender, which some do. They wanted him to surrender to spare civilians and the nation's infrastructure, but Hitler is not moved, he wanted everyone to fight to the last bullet and breath. It's their duty. He rails against his countrymen for not fighting harder. The film shows how other of the top Nazis dealt with the defeat. Some want to skip town, others want to make a deal with Americans to fight off the Red Army, others remain with Hitler in the bunker. Hitler loved you best if you told him you would suicide down there too. Goebbels is shown as his most loyal follower. His wife is shown as maniacally loyal in one gruesome scene. Hitler dies with about 40 minutes left in the movie, and then we follow one of his secretaries and a doctor through their final surrender or attempt to slip past the Russkies. I didn't care much for that segment. They could have ended it with Hitler's death, and the multiple suicides that followed, but the movie is partly based on a book by one secretary, so I guess they have to. They show actual footage of the secretaries at the beginning and end of the film talking about how they had no idea what Hitler was all about, that they were just swept up in it all, which I found unconvincing. (They also tried to make this one doctor out to be somehow heroic, but I say no thanks.) There's a scene where Hitler's dictating his last testament where he talks about his views on the war and his wishes for the nation (a real thing, read it, it's madness), and the secretary acts shocked when he bashes "international Jewry." Yeah right, she had no idea Hitler had hard feelings about Jews. The very last line of his testament is a swipe on Jews, they were a real pet peeve of his.

Sorry for spoilers.

 

[Jimmy Higgins]

Guardians of the Galaxy II - More Galaxier

I agree with the general consensus from previous reviews. If you like the first, you'll really like the second. Guardians of the Galaxy II walks a very very very thin line near the apex of over-the-top that is not too over-the-top. It takes itself serious at points and not so serious at other points... more successfully than I'd say an Ironman III achieved. I think there were a few issues with the plot, but in general, while certain events were easy to see coming, the underlying thread still had enough intrigue to make the viewer try and guess what ultimately was driving this.

I AM GROOT of 4

 

[Jayjay]

Guardians of the Galaxy II - More Galaxier

I agree with the general consensus from previous reviews. If you like the first, you'll really like the second. Guardians of the Galaxy II walks a very very very thin line near the apex of over-the-top that is not too over-the-top. It takes itself serious at points and not so serious at other points... more successfully than I'd say an Ironman III achieved. I think there were a few issues with the plot, but in general, while certain events were easy to see coming, the underlying thread still had enough intrigue to make the viewer try and guess what ultimately was driving this.

I AM GROOT of 4

I also saw it and I'm going to save myself time by just seconding this review instead of writing my own. Cartoonish, simple fun, but lots of it. Possibly the best Stan Lee cameo to date.

 

[Opoponax]

Alien: Covenant

I don't know where all the hate came from. This was a good movie. It could've been low expectations that allowed me to enjoy it, but almost all of the Stupid from Prometheus was gone, replaced with a largely good script. Certainly, there were improbabilities and questionable decisions made by the characters that one has to overlook, as well as a certain glaring inconsistency from Prometheus. But Prometheus was shit and this movie did well to overcome that. The special effects were great too.

7/10

 

[spikepipsqueak]

I'm not sure how the reset works at the finale, but I don't think it was the previous day -

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When Cruise wakes up in the helicopter at the end, it is after the events at the Louvre, as everyone is celebrating the demise of the aliens.

it is indeed the previous day - it's from the beginning of the movie when he's flying to the office of the general to be assigned to go to the war, and everyone is celebrating because the aliens just up and all died off.

it's completely inconsistent with the rest of the film, and actually reminded me a lot of the movie 'source code' - a vaguely similar sci-fi premise that also ended in a way that completely violated everything established in the entirety of the film in order to give it a schmaltzy happy ending.

The only way to reconcile it that I could think of was if the alien was attempting to reset to an earlier time but died before getting there. But I didn't like that since I thought at some point that they said it always reset to the beginning of the current day.

I've just watched Arrival which handled the concept of time anomaly much better.

I give that 9/10