Things that make you laugh...

[Angry Floof]

So, at the Eye Doctor, waiting to see if the Glaucoma Specialist has any argument with the Ophthalmologist.
First time i've ever been in this exam room. It's the one thry see ittty bittty kids in. So there's a teddy bear.
I observe, aloud, 'There's a teddy bear on that shelf!'
Nurse agrees and starts to explain how thry use the toy to assess the visionnnof vety young kids.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. "What's his name?"
She looks at me weird. "It...doesn't, um, have a name. It's a diagnostic tool, not someone's, um, friend."

I mutter, 'All the bears in MY house have names.'

She tries to nonchalantly look at my chart. Figured i would save her the math. "Yeah, I'm 58."

Next time you go there, give him a name. Teddy bears are friends to everyone.

 

[Keith&Co.]

His name is Wisconsin. Cocoa and Treeie approve.

 

[gmbteach]

So, at the Eye Doctor, waiting to see if the Glaucoma Specialist has any argument with the Ophthalmologist.
First time i've ever been in this exam room. It's the one thry see ittty bittty kids in. So there's a teddy bear.
I observe, aloud, 'There's a teddy bear on that shelf!'
Nurse agrees and starts to explain how thry use the toy to assess the visionnnof vety young kids.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. "What's his name?"
She looks at me weird. "It...doesn't, um, have a name. It's a diagnostic tool, not someone's, um, friend."

I mutter, 'All the bears in MY house have names.'

She tries to nonchalantly look at my chart. Figured i would save her the math. "Yeah, I'm 58."

I have yet to name all of mine. But the important ones are Ted, Tina, Patches and Agnes.

 

[gmbteach]

 

[Keith&Co.]

I mutter, 'All the bears in MY house have names.'

I have yet to name all of mine. But the important ones are Ted, Tina, Patches and Agnes.

Just bears, and just in our room, Cocoa, Tapioca (part of a set, the kids got Cinnamon, Honey, and Lemonade), Treeie, Gwivwey Bear, Gifty, Asterix, Devil, Panda, McTavish, Bearie, Small Bearie, Brown Bearie [no relation], and Scott.

 

[gmbteach]

I mutter, 'All the bears in MY house have names.'

I have yet to name all of mine. But the important ones are Ted, Tina, Patches and Agnes.

Just bears, and just in our room, Cocoa, Tapioca (part of a set, the kids got Cinnamon, Honey, and Lemonade), Treeie, Gwivwey Bear, Gifty, Asterix, Devil, Panda, McTavish, Bearie, Small Bearie, Brown Bearie [no relation], and Scott.

Ted and Tina are married and take it in turns to sleep with me. Patches is my bear that Bilby bought me when I was in Hospital a few years ago. Agnes is a very sad looking Charlie Bear I bought in York, who begged me to bring her home.

I have so many others still. I should put them on the bed one day, and take a picture.

Oh and then there is Herman the Hedgepig who dangles from the light between Bilby and I in the lounge room.

 

[Thomas II]

 

[ZiprHead]

^

 

[Keith&Co.]

Ted and Tina are married and take it in turns to sleep with me. Patches is my bear that Bilby bought me when I was in Hospital a few years ago. Agnes is a very sad looking Charlie Bear I bought in York, who begged me to bring her home.

Treeie was bought when i was zbout as tall as he is. Birthday or Christmas, there's a Polaroid somewhere of me in footsie pajamas holding him like i am taking a drunk sailor back to the liberty van.

Asterix was my hospital gift. I got him when they took out my gall bladder so i named him after the Gaul in the comics.
Apparently i had a long, pleasant conversation with the hospital chaplain about the importance of a teddy bear in times of stress, i do not recall it. I mean, not a word.
I was wrecked on pain meds, but my wife described the conversation i, and Asterix, had with the woman about teddy bears and prayers.
I asked that she not pray for me, but did invite her to hug the bear.

 

[Keith&Co.]

There was an adorable little moppet riding in her mom's shopping cart at the supermarket. Looking everywhere, curious, wondering about people, products, everything.

I was waiting for her mom to get eggs and move on so i could get eggs. Little tyke locked eyes with mine and asked, "Mommy, why are there so many old people at the store, today?"
Mom blushes. "No, no, dear, there are people of all ages at the store, and they all need to shop, it's a normal thing."
I said hi as they passed me. The gremlin then had to ask mommy, "What's a whippersnapper?"
"It means he heard you," she moaned, blushing almost invisible.

 

[bilby]

Just bears, and just in our room, Cocoa, Tapioca (part of a set, the kids got Cinnamon, Honey, and Lemonade), Treeie, Gwivwey Bear, Gifty, Asterix, Devil, Panda, McTavish, Bearie, Small Bearie, Brown Bearie [no relation], and Scott.

Ted and Tina are married and take it in turns to sleep with me. Patches is my bear that Bilby bought me when I was in Hospital a few years ago. Agnes is a very sad looking Charlie Bear I bought in York, who begged me to bring her home.

I have so many others still. I should put them on the bed one day, and take a picture.

Oh and then there is Herman the Hedgepig who dangles from the light between Bilby and I in the lounge room.

Herman is there because I am an erinaceinophile.

 

[Elixir]

There was an adorable little moppet riding in her mom's shopping cart at the supermarket. Looking everywhere, curious, wondering about people, products, everything.

I was waiting for her mom to get eggs and move on so i could get eggs. Little tyke locked eyes with mine and asked, "Mommy, why are there so many old people at the store, today?"
Mom blushes. "No, no, dear, there are people of all ages at the store, and they all need to shop, it's a normal thing."
I said hi as they passed me. The gremlin then had to ask mommy, "What's a whippersnapper?"
"It means he heard you," she moaned, blushing almost invisible.

Funny! We have met the enemy and it is loudmouth woopshits.

 

[bilby]

There was an adorable little moppet riding in her mom's shopping cart at the supermarket. Looking everywhere, curious, wondering about people, products, everything.

I was waiting for her mom to get eggs and move on so i could get eggs. Little tyke locked eyes with mine and asked, "Mommy, why are there so many old people at the store, today?"
Mom blushes. "No, no, dear, there are people of all ages at the store, and they all need to shop, it's a normal thing."
I said hi as they passed me. The gremlin then had to ask mommy, "What's a whippersnapper?"
"It means he heard you," she moaned, blushing almost invisible.

Funny! We have met the enemy and it is loudmouth woopshits.

View attachment 34452

It was the fashion in certain circles in the Eighteenth Century to wear shoes with lead soles. The idea being that it would give the wearer an advantage in a duel, where he would wear regular shoes and be faster and lighter on his feet.

It did have the unfortunate downside that many naval officers who fell overboard would sink like a rock due to their choice of footwear.

 

[Keith&Co.]

Hmmm. May have whoopsed.

So, there's NO ONE in the office most days. We're slowly and incrementally bringing the work force back to the plant. For various reasons i am among the first. I've gotten used to being alone in here.

Software was being a little bitch, and i apparently voiced my frustration.

This person i never met before stops at my cube and says, "Hate to break it to you, but God's last name isn't 'Dammit.'"

I look up at them. "That wasn't a salutation. It's an invocation. I'm not saying, 'Hey, God, howdy!' I am literally casting a very short spell, requesting and requiring the divine force of the universe to intercede in human affairs and make the AIM software stop being a little bitch when i need it, and/or consign it to Hell as punishment." Then stared at him.

He 'hrmph'-ed and walked off. As he did, another team member arrived and came over to my desk. "So, what were you and our new Tech Manager talking about?"

"We have a new Tech Manager?" Whoops..

 

[spikepipsqueak]

At least the new Tech Manager won't take as long to figure you out as they might otherwise have done.

 

[Loren Pechtel]

Hmmm. May have whoopsed.

So, there's NO ONE in the office most days. We're slowly and incrementally bringing the work force back to the plant. For various reasons i am among the first. I've gotten used to being alone in here.

Software was being a little bitch, and i apparently voiced my frustration.

This person i never met before stops at my cube and says, "Hate to break it to you, but God's last name isn't 'Dammit.'"

I look up at them. "That wasn't a salutation. It's an invocation. I'm not saying, 'Hey, God, howdy!' I am literally casting a very short spell, requesting and requiring the divine force of the universe to intercede in human affairs and make the AIM software stop being a little bitch when i need it, and/or consign it to Hell as punishment." Then stared at him.

He 'hrmph'-ed and walked off. As he did, another team member arrived and came over to my desk. "So, what were you and our new Tech Manager talking about?"

"We have a new Tech Manager?" Whoops..

Huh?

It's simply a bug report: You found a problem and are telling God what to do with it!

 

[Keith&Co.]

... and are telling God what to do with it!

Which, since the operator is supernatural, would be an invocation spell.

It's not an evocation as i cannot directly affect the disposition of any non-corporeal component of the device, but need an intermediary.

Might be a divination, if i somehow detect or determine that at some future time, God is GOING to consign the device to eternal damnation....

But, yeah, directing occult beings to take action is definitely spell-casting.

 

[Keith&Co.]

At least the new Tech Manager won't take as long to figure you out as they might otherwise have done.

Quite. I was looking on it as an efficiency in the next evaluation cycle. Always want the higher-ups to know who you are. Either by 'Oh! I know that guy's work!' or 'Oh....he's the one who did ___ that one time.'


Fortunately (or unfortunately), i was misinformed. He is _A_ new TM, but not OUR new TM. Our TM is not exactly leaving, they're going to move to another state and work remotely.

 

[Keith&Co.]

Oh, crap.

The restroom near my desk was closed for cleaning. I walked farther than usual to find an open one.
On the way back, going thru the High Bay, where they used to assemble the turrets for the Bradley Fighting Vehicle, i saw someone waving at me.
Nearsighted without my glasses, i had no idea who this was, but they were excited to see me.

Well, every week i see someone i haven't run into for 18 months so i waved back. They waved some more, i waved some more. Got closer, closer, still waving...

I have no idea who this fucker was. I swear, never saw them before in my life. Ever. His ethnicity is rare for this end of Massachusetts, i would have remembered.

He'd just walked thru a cobweb.

And now, unable to return to that building, i have to put in the paperwork to go remote until i retire.

 

[Loren Pechtel]

... and are telling God what to do with it!

Which, since the operator is supernatural, would be an invocation spell.

It's not an evocation as i cannot directly affect the disposition of any non-corporeal component of the device, but need an intermediary.

Might be a divination, if i somehow detect or determine that at some future time, God is GOING to consign the device to eternal damnation....

But, yeah, directing occult beings to take action is definitely spell-casting.

It's only spellcasting if you are using some sort of magical power to do it. No magical power, it's just a request. Perhaps a prayer.