You are attempting to make a weak semantic argument and nobody here is going to accept it except maybe pedophiles.
Semantics is important. Without knowing the meaning of words, verbal communication is impossible.
This is because pedophilia is wrong for a reason.
It is, when the actual meaning of the word is used. If you play fast and loose with the definition, it is not necessarily.
It is not wrong strictly as a function of the victim's age but rather as a function of the possibility of symmetrical informed consent.
You are conflating the issues of age of consent and of pedophilia.
How much does the person know about the risks, what does a person know about the implications, vs the other person. If one party to an act is incapable of being elevated to the level of the other party, to the point that both parties can make an even exchange, then there is a lack of symmetry, even in the case of consent, and this lack of symmetry invalidates consent.
Many sexual relationships, even among adults, are not symmetrical. That does not make them nonconsensual. That does not make them "pedophilia".
In modern language, pedophilia refers generally to an attraction, any attraction, where there can be no symmetrical informed consent due to differences in experience due to differences in the very opportunity to gain exoerience.
No, in modern language pedophilia refers to primary attraction to prepubescent children.
I know some people use "pedophilia" as a general insult to basically weaponize the disgust people rightly feel over it.
By the way, given your "symmetry" definition, would you say that a 50 year old having a consensual sexual relationship with a 25 year old was a "pedophile"? After all, the 50 year old has a lot more experience.
Or, imagine a man and a little boy have had their brains swapped. The little boy is now man shaped, and the man is now little-boy-shaped.
It would be pedophilia to fuck the man-shaped-boy.
It would not be pedophilia to fuck the boy-shaped-man.
Sure, let's look at "Big". Elizabeth Perkins' character being sexually attracted to 32 year old Tom Hanks is not pedophilia.
It would be wrong for her to act out on it if she knew he was really 12 of course, but she did not know it (until the end of the movie if I remember correctly).
This is what pedophilia means to modern people. Quit complaining at us about how you think language shouldn't change. Language changes to suit modern understanding.
I am still not exactly sure what this "new" definition of pedophilia is. Nothing you have written here makes the least bit of sense.