I continue to be utterly perplexed about the opinion that if person-A don’t want to gay marry, then no one else should be able to, either.
Genuinely perplexed.
For the purpose of this post, I’ll call the person/people who holds this opinion “Fundy” and collectively “Fundies” so that I don’t cause confusion by using “you” or “you all” or “yours.”
Fundies seem to have fears about their own feelings. I can’t think of any other way to describe it. They react like they have fears; really deep unresolved worry that gay marriage will happen TO THEM.
Is it because they see the behavior of patriarchal cultures and think, “we’ve been forcing unwanted marriages on unwilling people for millenia, and if the gays could, then they’d act just like us”? But there is ZERO evidence that anyone with a woke mindset is interested in forcing marriage on anyone at all, let alone straight people.
So what’s the fear then? If the taboo is lifted that Fundies will find themselves drawn to entering a gay relationship and a gay marriage and they are terrified that they’ll actually want it? That once the risk of punishment is gone, nothing else will give them strength against their desires?
It’s not just an apparent fear that gays will happen to their children (Fundies intend to coerce their children onto straight marraiges and don’t want any competing pressures, so that it’s not more difficult), but it really seems to be a personal fear.
The idea that millions of people who have chosen marriage with a person of their choice should be made into criminals by Clarence Thomas and that Fundies are happy about that prospect needs to answer to this idea that Fundies are committed to forcing unwanted marriages onto people.
What goes through one’s mind whan they ponder that and promote it. Glee? Aha! Now I can get in between the sheets with other people’s marriages! Now I can picture other people have sex the way I like it. Now I do’t have to be disturbed thinking about other people having sex in ways that I wouldn’t like. And less pruriently, but just as perverse, now I can get in the way of their feelings of love, support and contented companionship, because it’s really important to me that *I* be centered in other people’s relationships.
It just plumb baffles me, this need to be the one in charge of other people’s affections, and further, the desire to interrupt and be the rift that makes other people unhappy. Fundies say, “I want you to be happy my way or not at all. I cannot fathom you having happiness without me, so I will kick over your sand castle and feel glorious about it.”
Why. WHY??? What makes Fundies so happy to crush other people’s happiness? What exactly do they fear so deeply? That they’ll see someone being happy walking down the street? That Fundy will see someone celebrating a happiness that Fundy doesn’t understand, or is afraid to feel themselves?
No one is making Fundy do anything but stop harming their neighbor. And this terrifies Fundy. They want to control and harm their neighbor. Crush neighbor’s happiness, and force neighbor into unwanted marriages. Only then will Fundy be at peace.
Clarence Thomas wants this. Clarence wants to be under the sheets with other people’s marriages to make sure they are doing it his way. He is agitated and axious until he can be in control of their sex. Why? Clarence has been married a long time (to someone that previous Fundies would have murder him for being married to); no one can force him to marry someone different now. So no gays are going to threaten his marriage. His vows means exactly what they meant when he said them. And if his marriage is not currently harmed, then why would he want to overturn the law that expelled him from other people’s beds? Why does he want to get back into other people’s beds?