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- Thread starter Angry Floof
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thebeave
Contributor
I would have thought that these days, he would have been tackled, arrested and charged with sexual assault. Maybe there's hope for humanity afterall.
A similar thing happened to my aunt years ago when she was sitting poolside watching her kids while they were swimming in the public pool. She asked her friend next to her to go buy her a soda. A few minutes pass, and a hand appears next to her holding an open can of soda. So, she says "thanks", grabs it and starts drinking from it. Turns out a stranger with a soda in hand had just sidled up next to her for a few seconds...it was not her friend. The stranger was obviously a little stunned at first, but they soon had a good laugh at this case of mistaken identity.
Subject: King Charles III
King Charles decided to take up walking every day. At the same street corner, he passed a hooker standing there every day.
He learned to brace himself as he approached her for what was almost certain to follow.
"One hundred and fifty pounds!" she'd shout.
"No! Five pounds!" He said from the side of his mouth, just to shut her up.
This ritual between him and the hooker became a daily occurrence.
She'd yell, "One hundred and fifty pounds!" He'd yell back, "Five pounds!"
One day, Camilla decided to accompany her husband.
As the couple neared the hooker's corner, King Charles realized she'd bark her £150 offer and Camilla would wonder what he'd really been doing on all his past outings.
He figured he'd better have a good explanation for his wife.
As they neared the hooker’s corner, he became even more apprehensive than usual.
Sure enough, there she stood. He tried to avoid eye contact as she watched the pair pass.
Then, the hooker yelled:
"See what you get for five pounds, you tight bastard!”
King Charles decided to take up walking every day. At the same street corner, he passed a hooker standing there every day.
He learned to brace himself as he approached her for what was almost certain to follow.
"One hundred and fifty pounds!" she'd shout.
"No! Five pounds!" He said from the side of his mouth, just to shut her up.
This ritual between him and the hooker became a daily occurrence.
She'd yell, "One hundred and fifty pounds!" He'd yell back, "Five pounds!"
One day, Camilla decided to accompany her husband.
As the couple neared the hooker's corner, King Charles realized she'd bark her £150 offer and Camilla would wonder what he'd really been doing on all his past outings.
He figured he'd better have a good explanation for his wife.
As they neared the hooker’s corner, he became even more apprehensive than usual.
Sure enough, there she stood. He tried to avoid eye contact as she watched the pair pass.
Then, the hooker yelled:
"See what you get for five pounds, you tight bastard!”
Thomas II
Contributor
Which one should I worship???
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Thomas II
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Thomas II
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Thomas II
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Elixir
Made in America
… the look on the cat’s face!
Thomas II
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Thomas II
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DBT
Contributor
I asked a German if he knew the square root of 81. He said nein.
TV and credit cards
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Thomas II
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Thomas II
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Oh yeah?
Cheerful Charlie
Contributor
I know I shouldn't laugh at this, but....
Calling Gary Larson.
.....
Nile crocodiles were found to react to the cries of baby bonobos, chimpanzees, and humans — and they appear to be able to detect the degree of distress, research published in Proceedings of the Royal Society B, the Royal Society's main biological research journal, found.
Researchers played audio recordings of infants crying to the carnivorous crocodiles and discovered they were drawn to those in the most distress.
.....
www.yahoo.com
Calling Gary Larson.
.....
Nile crocodiles were found to react to the cries of baby bonobos, chimpanzees, and humans — and they appear to be able to detect the degree of distress, research published in Proceedings of the Royal Society B, the Royal Society's main biological research journal, found.
Researchers played audio recordings of infants crying to the carnivorous crocodiles and discovered they were drawn to those in the most distress.
.....
Crocodiles were played the sound of human babies crying. The higher the infant's distress level, the more the carnivores would respond.
New research shows that Nile crocodiles appear to react to the cries of infants — responses may be predatory but could also show a maternal instinct.
Cheerful Charlie
Contributor
Barbie crocodile lure.
Loud Speaker Not Included
Loud Speaker Not Included
thebeave
Contributor
I'll keep this in mind if/when I have a young infant or toddler who won't stop crying:I know I shouldn't laugh at this, but....
Calling Gary Larson.
.....
Nile crocodiles were found to react to the cries of baby bonobos, chimpanzees, and humans — and they appear to be able to detect the degree of distress, research published in Proceedings of the Royal Society B, the Royal Society's main biological research journal, found.
Researchers played audio recordings of infants crying to the carnivorous crocodiles and discovered they were drawn to those in the most distress.
.....
Crocodiles were played the sound of human babies crying. The higher the infant's distress level, the more the carnivores would respond.
New research shows that Nile crocodiles appear to react to the cries of infants — responses may be predatory but could also show a maternal instinct.
"Now, Freddy, remember what I told you about the crocodiles. If you don't stop crying like that, we're going to make a little visit to the zoo."
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Or their weight.