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Things that make you laugh...

Our teachers are sitting through their annual training right now. All in the lunch room, split into the four corners, covering sexual harassment, mandatory reporting, school policy on masks, bare midriffs, tardiness, pronouns, caps and hoodies, allergens, and whatever else they've decided needs to be presented to the teaching staff to legally cover the school board.
My wife doesn't attend any more but she spoke to a former colleague and she's having flashbacks.

Which gives ME flashbacks. Before we went down to the boat every patrol, the Navy had us spend a day in an auditorium getting all the annual training requirements out of the way. Sexual harassment, equal opportunity, security, computer security, authorized use, hygiene, foreign port hygiene (Condoms!) and whatever else was required to CYA for the command.

… and just when it looked like we were done for the day, the Chief of the Whole Boat produced the Watch Quarter and Station Bill and told us who would be topside on the maneuvering watch... Who get to stay late, and watch this FASCINATING movie on the dangers of line handling.

Good Christ, can't i test out? I mean, i was phone-talker topside so many times i have that 1973 film MEMORIZED. I can sing along with the brief, i can tell you which line parts and i have named the mannequin that gets cut in half by the parting line (Seaman Joe Bagodonuts…. Not terribly original, but then, neither was the safety film).
 
I dreamed I was at work. Working on the next lesson in our efforts to train up submarine Missile Technicians. I became convinced that i had developed the perfect Terminal Learning Objective for the Administration of Work Center Logkeeping Records lesson. To wit:

Hickory Dickory Dockage,
The logs are full of knowledge.
Click to expand...










This long weekend may not belong enough...
 
Bad day for remote workers at my company.
As they signed on to the morning meeting, they were reporting that it took between 20 and 40 minutes to get onto the network this morning. Both domains were available but both were glacially slow.

I'm in the office. I reported that i had to park TWO WHOLE PARKING SPACES further from the gate than i usually do, this morning. Computer was still signed on from yesterday.

Strangely, no one was sympathetic to my plight...
 
Attempted coup in Australia. Leader appoints herself as GG.

An attempted coup d'état has been foiled by the Australian Federal Police, after they arrested a woman who has declared herself Governor General, for illegally importing fake police badges. She planned to form her own alternative Federal Police force, and to arrest a number of senior government officials and elected members of parliament.

"Queensland Joint Counter Terrorism Team investigators (JCTT) have not found an impending threat to community safety, and have yet to find any evidence the group had the ability to carry out acts they had discussed," the AFP said in a statement.
Click to expand...

https://www.abc.net.au/news/2021-09-10/peterborough-woman-arrested-over-fake-police-badges/100452416
 
Keith&Co. said:
Someone said the Proposal effort is a 'shenanigans free zone.'

I am apparently the only person in our office who heard that and did NOT think: That means shenanigans are prohibited up there.'

I took it as a complaint that the area was shenanigan-deficient. Something that needed correcting. So I gave a participant a bucket of plastic dinosaurs. "Spread 'em around, have fun," I told him.

They did not have fun. They've apparently spent the better part of two hours arguing whether the archaeopteryx figure is, or is not, a dinosaur. And they're trying to determine whose goddamned idea the dinosaur toys were.

I may not get the bucket back.
Click to expand...
I got the dinosaurs back, today.

haven't seen the dinosaurs in two years. Heard about them for a month after donating them to the Proposal effort (for a contract we did not get). Usually phrased as 'Were those goddamned dinosaurs your goddamned idea?'

Today, someone i have never met walked into our area, went name-tag by name-tag and stopped at my cube. "I believe these are yours." Dumped the bucket on my desk and left.

I didn't get the bucket.

But, it wasn't my bucket.

As i picked up the dinosaurs, i found several small plastic figures of dinosaurs that did not come from my original set. Wherever they have been, they have accumulated friends....

The only other coworker in the office went by my cube as i interrogated each one to see if they were the one that gave up my name....
 
bilby said:
An attempted coup d'état has been foiled by the Australian Federal Police, after they arrested a woman who has declared herself Governor General, for illegally importing fake police badges. She planned to form her own alternative Federal Police force, and to arrest a number of senior government officials and elected members of parliament.

"Queensland Joint Counter Terrorism Team investigators (JCTT) have not found an impending threat to community safety, and have yet to find any evidence the group had the ability to carry out acts they had discussed," the AFP said in a statement.
Click to expand...

https://www.abc.net.au/news/2021-09-10/peterborough-woman-arrested-over-fake-police-badges/100452416
Click to expand...

When I read the article, my first thought was, "a woman in South Australia who ran for office in Western Australia was trying to organise a national coup in Queensland? I must know more!"

Then I discovered she was a former Palmer United candidate and it all made sense. What a fucking let down.
 
Patooka said:
bilby said:
An attempted coup d'état has been foiled by the Australian Federal Police, after they arrested a woman who has declared herself Governor General, for illegally importing fake police badges. She planned to form her own alternative Federal Police force, and to arrest a number of senior government officials and elected members of parliament.

"Queensland Joint Counter Terrorism Team investigators (JCTT) have not found an impending threat to community safety, and have yet to find any evidence the group had the ability to carry out acts they had discussed," the AFP said in a statement.
Click to expand...

https://www.abc.net.au/news/2021-09-10/peterborough-woman-arrested-over-fake-police-badges/100452416
Click to expand...

When I read the article, my first thought was, "a woman in South Australia who ran for office in Western Australia was trying to organise a national coup in Queensland? I must know more!"

Then I discovered she was a former Palmer United candidate and it all made sense. What a fucking let down.
Click to expand...

Wait, what?

On what planet does any part of this "make sense"?

It's fractally crazy.

I am thinking that you don't really mean "makes sense", so much as "doesn't surprise me".
 
bilby said:
Patooka said:
When I read the article, my first thought was, "a woman in South Australia who ran for office in Western Australia was trying to organise a national coup in Queensland? I must know more!"

Then I discovered she was a former Palmer United candidate and it all made sense. What a fucking let down.
Click to expand...

Wait, what?

On what planet does any part of this "make sense"?

It's fractally crazy.

I am thinking that you don't really mean "makes sense", so much as "doesn't surprise me".
Click to expand...

I'm thinking that, too. I am also guilty of using this phrasing for things that are fractally crazy, like how abortion zealotry "makes sense" but only within the context of insane right wing cult mentality and ideology.
 
bilby said:
Patooka said:
When I read the article, my first thought was, "a woman in South Australia who ran for office in Western Australia was trying to organise a national coup in Queensland? I must know more!"

Then I discovered she was a former Palmer United candidate and it all made sense. What a fucking let down.
Click to expand...

Wait, what?

On what planet does any part of this "make sense"?

It's fractally crazy.

I am thinking that you don't really mean "makes sense", so much as "doesn't surprise me".
Click to expand...

That's what I meant. Oops.
 
The Halloween candy is on display.
As i passed that aisle, a young girl held up a bag of Hershey bars that are 'glow in the dark.'
"What are these for?" She asked her father and brother. "Who eould buy these?"
I reached past her for a bag. She looked at me like i was crazy. So i said softly, "I wanna see what my poop looks like."

Her brother said, 'Ewwwww!'
She suddenly looked thoughtful. Then turned to ask dad if they could get some....

Gonna count that as an upcheck for the day.
 
Boss has spelling problems.
He had to fill out a form and for some reason shared the form in Teams so we could 'help.'

There were four of us suggesting improvements or standardized phrasing for these submittals.
Like, for system affected, we need to say "Fire Control System Mk 98 Mod 6."
: he typed, "Fire Control."
"No, it's Fire Control System." he adds System.
"Oh, yeah. So, Mark 98?" Types Mark.
"No, Mk." he backspaces, types MK.
"No, Lower case k." He fixes that. Types 98.
I suggested; "No, lower case 8." He backspaces and looks for the lower case 8. Eventually curses my name, my family, my hairline....

Upcheck for the day.
 
Keith&Co. said:
As i picked up the dinosaurs, i found several small plastic figures of dinosaurs that did not come from my original set. Wherever they have been, they have accumulated friends....
Click to expand...
551.jpg
 
if3IMEZ.jpeg



Why not, though?
According to canon, He's omnipresent.
He's in the room with me now.
He's in my browser.
He's in the website i surfed to.
He was in the room when the photo was taken, and IN the model, including the exterior, the interior, the paint job, the attachments, the wheeled base...
Might not be in the lighting they used... Not sure if omnipresence and indirect lighting make a paradox.
 
Keith&Co. said:
View attachment 35313



Why not, though?
According to canon, He's omnipresent.
He's in the room with me now.
He's in my browser.
He's in the website i surfed to.
He was in the room when the photo was taken, and IN the model, including the exterior, the interior, the paint job, the attachments, the wheeled base...
Might not be in the lighting they used... Not sure if omnipresence and indirect lighting make a paradox.
Click to expand...

You missed the most important part of the omni God: He is in my hand, helping me along.
 
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