I have no love for Giuliani, but Hanlon’s Razor tells me that he’s merely bad at expressing himself.
He says “…she was never present when I asked for a pardon”, but what he was trying to say was “…I never asked for a pardon in her presence”; He then goes on to say that he explicitly said he didn’t want or need one.
That may well be a lie, but it’s not an obvious and infantile piece of self-contradiction.
Of course, it does leave open the bigger can of worms, that is Trump handing out pardons like candy - clearly the act of a president who expected his administration to need them.
That is a viable argument. Tweeting while drunk makes such things possible. BUT... here is the important thing, what did Giuliani say? He doesn't say "I never asked Trump for a pardon." Instead he says:
"I told the President I did not want or need one."
Wait what? Why in the heck are pardons even a topic then, if you didn't need or want one?
Trump: Need another Diet Coke here!
Giuliani: I do not want or need a pardon.
Trump: Wha?
Giuliani: You know, I just don't need one.
Trump: Where's my diet coke?!
or
Trump: Okay, now things could get kind of crappy if the murdering gets out of hand. Who wants a pardon?
Giuliani: I do not want or need a pardon.
Trump: Seriously? We are committing sedition bigly here. Gonna break all sorts of laws.
Giuliani: I'll be fine.
Trump: Gaetz wants five, one for his uh... what is Nestor again?
Giuliani: I'm a lawyer, I know what I'm going.