Things that make you laugh...

[Angry Floof]

CAN WE DO A BETTER JOB OF MONITORING WHO IS ALLOWED IN THIS COMMUNITY PLEASE?! WE HAVE A NEW MEMBER, AN ELDERLY MAN. HE'S BEEN PRIVATELY MESSAGING ME, SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES OF HIMSELF IN NASTY POSES ALONG WITH CLOSE UPS OF HIS UNMENTIONABLES. HE IS OFFERING AN IPHONE 8+ IN EXCHANGE FOR SEXUAL FAVORS. I AM ESPECIALLY PISSED BECAUSE IT TURNED OUT TO BE AN IPHONE 6 AND OBVIOUSLY SOMETHING'S WRONG WITH IT. IT'S SUPER SLOW AND THE CAPS LOCK IS STUCK ON.

 

[Keith&Co.]

I'm diabetic, and one of the symptoms of my blood sugar crashing is that i NEVER know my blod sugar is crashing.

My three main indicators are sweating, nausea, and denial.

Last night, i was uncomfortable and my moaning woke my wife up.
"What's wrong?"
"I don't feel good."
"What are you feeling? Does your chest hurt?' I suspect she was starting with heart attack, to work her way down.
"No, no, just... I think I'm seasick."
"You were career Navy. Do you want your friends to know you got seasick on a waterbed?"
"Oh. Noooooooo...."
"Think your blood sugar is low?"
"Nope."
"And what do you always say when your blood sugar is low?"
".........Nope?"
"Think you might want to go eat something?"


I swear, if she ever wants to kill me, she just hasvto leave me alone for a week or two...

 

[Angry Floof]

What a hideous style of bed. I'd feel like I was in a giant medical device.



Why???

 

[bilby]

What a hideous style of bed. I'd feel like I was in a giant medical device.

View attachment 17723

Why???

Because people have WILDLY differing senses of taste and style, which often change radically over short timespans.

To me it looks like the designer was going for 'futuristic' - You are supposed to feel like you are sleeping on the starship Enterprise or Moonbase Alpha.

Back in the '80s, I visited the Calder Hall nuclear reactor for the first time. I expected a 'modern' super hi-tech control room all in white, and full of computer screens and flashing LED lights. Because Nuclear Power Plant control rooms are at the pinnacle of technology, right?

But Calder Hall was built in the early '50s. The control room looked super hi-tech; But 1950s hi-tech. It was like something out of the original Mission Impossible tv series, the Saturday morning Flash Gordon movie serials, or Irwin Allen's Time Tunnel - not a computer screen in sight, lots of toggle switches and big dial gauges, set in pale green anodised consoles.

To my 1980s eye, it looked more dated than stonehenge. But you could see that it must have looked like sci-fi to the first guys to work there.

There's a very fine line between 'sumptuous' and 'garish'. Check out anything decorated by (or for) wealthy arabs, or Donald Trump. Business class on Emirates airlines looks like it was decorated by a magpie on acid. Just keep slapping on the polished walnut and gold trims; Fuck subtlety, too much is barely enough.

The designer of that bed watched too much sci-fi in the 1970s, and likely spent all of 1985 playing 'Elite' on his ZX Spectrum, without once stopping to sleep*.











*I know I did, and a tiny part of my brain that is still a teenager is telling me that that bed is so fucking cool. The rest of my neurons are planning to give that one a serious kicking after school.

 

[Elixir]

The designer of that bed watched too much sci-fi in the 1970s, and likely spent all of 1985 playing 'Elite' on his ZX Spectrum, without once stopping to sleep.

My cat would make short work of that POS, no matter who designed it.

 

[Angry Floof]

My family is full of hardcore Redskins fans. They're all going nuts right now. I'm guessing the Redskins are doing well? Somebody tagged me in one of the memes.

So, of course, amid all the ALL HAILs and woots and fuck yeahs, I commented with the Noam Chomsky quote that sports fandom is just training in irrational jingoism, which was of course followed by more ALL HAILs, woots, and fuck yeahs.

Oh, and the meme was one that combined the Redskins' sportsball conquest with the Murican flag, 'cause fans are also patriots 'n shit! Ignore the atheist. She ain't even got god.

Which was a demonstration of my whole point, and no one cared or even noticed.

 

[Angry Floof]

The designer of that bed watched too much sci-fi in the 1970s, and likely spent all of 1985 playing 'Elite' on his ZX Spectrum, without once stopping to sleep.

My cat would make short work of that POS, no matter who designed it.

It looks like the molded type of styrofoam, like something you could have made for a school project as a kid. Take the molded foam out of the TV box or the cheese printer box or whatever, and that becomes your project structure. Then stick white contact paper all over it, and then maybe add some led lights and silver model paint pin stripes.

Just add a drop screen and projector and you have a bed. Makes sense!

OR maybe it's just a tiny house made out of an Easy Bake oven.

 

[Arctish]

The Philadelphia Flyers have a new mascot

and his name is Gritty

Show

Fan reaction has been pretty heartfelt.

“If this thing tries to touch me, I’m launching a beer at its head.”

 

[Angry Floof]

What a hideous style of bed. I'd feel like I was in a giant medical device.

View attachment 17723

Why???

Because people have WILDLY differing senses of taste and style, which often change radically over short timespans.

To me it looks like the designer was going for 'futuristic' - You are supposed to feel like you are sleeping on the starship Enterprise or Moonbase Alpha.

Back in the '80s, I visited the Calder Hall nuclear reactor for the first time. I expected a 'modern' super hi-tech control room all in white, and full of computer screens and flashing LED lights. Because Nuclear Power Plant control rooms are at the pinnacle of technology, right?

But Calder Hall was built in the early '50s. The control room looked super hi-tech; But 1950s hi-tech. It was like something out of the original Mission Impossible tv series, the Saturday morning Flash Gordon movie serials, or Irwin Allen's Time Tunnel - not a computer screen in sight, lots of toggle switches and big dial gauges, set in pale green anodised consoles.

To my 1980s eye, it looked more dated than stonehenge. But you could see that it must have looked like sci-fi to the first guys to work there.

There's a very fine line between 'sumptuous' and 'garish'. Check out anything decorated by (or for) wealthy arabs, or Donald Trump. Business class on Emirates airlines looks like it was decorated by a magpie on acid. Just keep slapping on the polished walnut and gold trims; Fuck subtlety, too much is barely enough.

The designer of that bed watched too much sci-fi in the 1970s, and likely spent all of 1985 playing 'Elite' on his ZX Spectrum, without once stopping to sleep*.











*I know I did, and a tiny part of my brain that is still a teenager is telling me that that bed is so fucking cool. The rest of my neurons are planning to give that one a serious kicking after school.

I know what you mean about rich Arab/Trump ugly furniture. Ugh. I once knew a family whose front room was almost entirely gold stuff.

As for the giant all-in-one printer/scanner/fax/copier/bed/cinema, is there a sci fi show or movie that would have a bed like that? Maybe it's a movie set or some nerd's reenactment.

 

[Loren Pechtel]

I was out hiking. Most of the trees out on the mountain are evergreen but there are a decent number of aspens out there which were a subject of discussion as they were mostly yellow by now.

I'm a programmer and somehow I got stuck on splitting "aspen" into "as pen"--in other words, typecasting something into a pen. Now, how does a tree write something?!?!

 

[bilby]

I was out hiking. Most of the trees out on the mountain are evergreen but there are a decent number of aspens out there which were a subject of discussion as they were mostly yellow by now.

I'm a programmer and somehow I got stuck on splitting "aspen" into "as pen"--in other words, typecasting something into a pen. Now, how does a tree write something?!?!

As Pencils

 

[Keith&Co.]

Boss and I going over my inputs the this years evaluations.

What are your goals for the coming year, what changes could be made to improve your work environment, what would you like to be recognized for by upper management.

'Dinosaur costume' is not an appropriate answer for all three of those questions. Apparently.

I asked if I needed to be more specific? T-Rex?


It seems that the boss and I are on entirely different wavelengths on this page...

 

[ZiprHead]

Boss and I going over my inputs the this years evaluations.

What are your goals for the coming year, what changes could be made to improve your work environment, what would you like to be recognized for by upper management.

'Dinosaur costume' is not an appropriate answer for all three of those questions. Apparently.

I asked if I needed to be more specific? T-Rex?


It seems that the boss and I are on entirely different wavelengths on this page...

I always hated those. They force me to lie.

 

[Elixir]

Boss and I going over my inputs the this years evaluations.

What are your goals for the coming year, what changes could be made to improve your work environment, what would you like to be recognized for by upper management.

'Dinosaur costume' is not an appropriate answer for all three of those questions. Apparently.

I asked if I needed to be more specific? T-Rex?


It seems that the boss and I are on entirely different wavelengths on this page...

I always hated those. They force me to lie.

Please explain how dinosaur costumes force you to lie.

 

[bilby]

Boss and I going over my inputs the this years evaluations.

What are your goals for the coming year, what changes could be made to improve your work environment, what would you like to be recognized for by upper management.

'Dinosaur costume' is not an appropriate answer for all three of those questions. Apparently.

I asked if I needed to be more specific? T-Rex?


It seems that the boss and I are on entirely different wavelengths on this page...

I always hated those. They force me to lie.

Please explain how dinosaur costumes force you to lie.

Seriously, would you tell the truth while dressed as a T. Rex?

 

[Keith&Co.]

Please explain how dinosaur costumes force you to lie.

Seriously, would you tell the truth while dressed as a T. Rex?

Costumes are (currently!) Prohibited at work becausevthey hide your identity. So, it sort of IS a lie.

My argument is that if _I_ wear a Trex suit to the office, no one will be saying, "I wonder who that could be?"

 

[bilby]

Please explain how dinosaur costumes force you to lie.

Seriously, would you tell the truth while dressed as a T. Rex?

Costumes are (currently!) Prohibited at work becausevthey hide your identity. So, it sort of IS a lie.

My argument is that if _I_ wear a Trex suit to the office, no one will be saying, "I wonder who that could be?"

Perhaps if your employee ID photo was of you in a T. Rex suit, this would be less of an issue?

Certainly that's something you might consider next time you renew your ID...

 

[Angry Floof]

Clear recipe instructions:

DIRECTIONS:
Preheat oven to 350F. Line a 9 x 13 pan or similar with aluminum foil and spray it very well with cooking spray. Do not try to make this without using foil; you will hate yourself.

 

[bilby]

 

[Keith&Co.]

Opoponax said something in a thread in politics:

Not to be a dick (meaning: about to be a dick),

Not necessarily.
I do love to open statements with "I don't want to sound sexist (or racist, etc.)..."

"I don't want to sound leftist, but the printshop wants you to pick up the wall charts."
"What is leftist about that? That's not leftist!"
"Great! Because I didn't want to sound leftist! God, you never listen."
"Dude! What the FUCK are you talking about?"
"Never mind, I hate having to repeat myself."

I don't want to sound sexist, but the meeting starts in ten minutes.

I don't want to sound racist, but it's raining outside.