Words you do NOT want in your obituary

[spikepipsqueak]

Yep, I was referring to The Darwins.


Is that thread current? How have I missed it?

 

[Keith&Co.]

Sorry, it's a mythical thread, just a funny.

 

[spikepipsqueak]

Damn.

 

[ZiprHead]

"His very conservative church refused the family's request to perform his funeral."

 

[Keith&Co.]

"In lieu of flowers, the family requests:

"...donations to the Flat Earth Society..."

"...donations to the Holy Shit It's Real Action League..."

"...clues or suggestions as to the location(s) of his bodily remains..."

"...Lego pieces for constructing the mausoleum ..."

"...that anyone showing similar symptoms contact Centers for Disease Control immediately..."

 

[Keith&Co.]

"Extinct"

"inadvertently paroled"

"reentry velocity"

 

[ZiprHead]

Being a submariner, Keith, you may really appreciate this one.:

"Marianas Trench"

 

[Keith&Co.]

Being a submariner, Keith, you may really appreciate this one.:

"Marianas Trench"

Uh...yeah. Bleh.

Which puts me in mind:

"Crush depth"

"Test depth"

"A botched rescue attempt"

"explosive decompression"

"..superstitiously avoided by fishermen ever since..."

 

[Thomas II]

"...Hiroshi Ouchi..."

 

[Tom Sawyer]

I think that one of the worst phrases to hear in an obituary would be "Let's face it ... we all kind of saw this coming."

 

[abaddon]

“Good riddance”

 

[Jimmy Higgins]

'presumed raptured'

'bukake face shield malfunction'

 

[Jimmy Higgins]

'presumed raptured'

'bukake face shield malfunction'

It occurred to me I probably wouldn't want the word 'bukake' in my obituary at all.

 

[bigfield]

'...vice captain of the local bukake team...'

'...remembered for his achievements, including a black belt in bukake...'

'...Guinness world record attempt..drowned...bukake...'

 

[Keith&Co.]

"...and the syndrome will be named after him as he was Patient Zero..."

"...after his lucky shirt got caught in the shredder..."

"...last seen in the vicinity of..."

"...thrown from the plane somewhere over the Rocky Mountains..."

 

[Elixir]

"...after his lucky shirt got caught in the shredder..."

Reminds me of one of the terrors of my youth:


I hope the words "Wringer Washer" don't show up in my obit!

 

[hurtinbuckaroo]

"... stuffed and mounted ..."

"... mounted and stuffed ..."

 

[spikepipsqueak]

" ...had to be poured ..."

 

[hurtinbuckaroo]

"... wood chipper ..."

"... while attempting to repair the pumpkin catapult's safety mechanism ..."

"... Fugu ..."

 

[ZiprHead]

"Found dead under his 450 pound girlfriend..."